


Red Strings

by Annzy_Bananzy



Category: Moominvalley (Cartoon 2019), Mumintroll | Moomins Series - Tove Jansson, 楽しいムーミン一家 | Moomin (Anime 1990)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Red String of Fate, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:41:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 40,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29078028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annzy_Bananzy/pseuds/Annzy_Bananzy
Summary: Snufkin was happy with the severed string tied around his finger. Having no soulmate meant he was free to do as he liked without worry for another, which suited the life of a vagabond very well. Plus, he knew things about others and their relationships that not even they knew, which was always fun.But what is he supposed to do when Moomin and Snorkmaiden's connected string snapped? Or when Moomin's string connected with his previously severed one?
Relationships: Mumintrollet | Moomintroll & Snorkfröken | The Snork Maiden, Mumintrollet | Moomintroll/Snusmumriken | Snufkin, Snorkfröken | The Snork Maiden & Snusmumriken | Snufkin
Comments: 223
Kudos: 174





	1. It Begins

**Author's Note:**

> This idea would not leave my brain so I had to write it down. Enjoy~
> 
> Edit: [Anzuss](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anzuss/pseuds/Anzuss) on AO3 (and [xanzusx](https://xanzusx.tumblr.com) on tumblr) made some BEAUTIFUL [fanart ](https://annzybwrites.tumblr.com/post/645765654865117184/oh-my-gosh-this-looks-so-good-i-love-the) for this fic!! Everyone please go check it out :D 
> 
> The fanart links to my writing tumblr since I know I'm not going to change my blog name, but feel free to reblog directly from her please <3

The Red String of Fate, for those who don’t know, is an invisible and intangible string tied around the finger that connects a person to their soulmate, even if they’re on the other side of the world from each other. While this is simply a whimsical myth to most, there are a privileged few that know just how real it is. 

Those with severed strings, like Snufkin, are able to see these thin, red marvels, even if they still can’t touch them. To have a severed string is rare, but since Snufkin has done a lot of travelling in his short life, he’s been able to meet five others just like himself. And from those he’s encountered, both loners and soulmates alike, he’s learned all sorts of things about these tricky strings. 

The red string isn’t just a connector, for instance; it’s also a reflection of the bond between soulmates. Before they meet, the string is a bright, thin, tightly woven, unchanging red, and after they meet and interact throughout the years the string can change in either brightness, thickness, or even color in some cases. Snufkin isn’t entirely sure what the different colors meant, but he was fascinated by the one time he’d seen an orange string. 

When Snufkin was younger, he wasn’t quite sure what to make of it all. He wondered if he should feel proud at being privy to one of the universe’s greatest secrets, or sad that he himself did not have a soulmate. But, after meeting so many people, the opinion he’d finally settled on was that he was happy this way. He didn’t need to worry about being literally tied down to another person, which meant he was free to continue wandering and traveling for as long as he wanted. He liked to think of the world as his soulmate, and it felt like the world loved him back with everything it had, what all the beautiful sights he’d seen. 

Sometimes he’d even help soulmates get together, if he was in the mood for it. Other times, admittedly, he’d fan the flames of an argument between soulmates for his own amusement. The way he saw it was they’d be fine in the long run; the universe said so, after all. The only soulmate pair he’d ever actually worried about was between his best friend, Moomintroll, and Moomin’s girlfriend, Snorkmaiden. 

He swore their string changed with the wind. One day it could be as bright and shiny as the morning sun, and the next it would be so frayed and dirty that it looked about ready to snap. It has definitely been interesting to watch; Snufkin almost wished he would have documented all of the changes he witnessed. Not that it would make sense to anyone but himself. 

But, no matter what happened, they stayed connected to each other. It was fate, after all, and no amount of fighting or misunderstandings could break them apart. 

So then why, on a normal spring day, did he see Moomin with a severed string? 

—

Snufkin played his harmonica as he walked through the edges of Moominvalley’s forests, as he always did when he returned every spring. It was the time to show off the new tune he’d thought of, and to alert a special someone of his return. 

“Snufkin!” 

Right on time. Snufkin stifled his smile so he could continue playing, lifting his head a little higher so he could watch Moomin run towards him with that shameless smile he always had. Another start to a comfortable year in Moominvalley. 

As Moomin grew closer, however, Snufkin’s song stopped short. His eyes were drawn to Moomin’s left hand, where a red string flapped haphazardly in the wind, clearly not tied to anything anymore. 

“Snufkin!” Moomin panted as he stopped in front of him, still smiling wide as he kept talking. “You’re a bit earlier this year! Not that I’m complaining of course, I’m rather glad to have you here – oh, of course you know that.” He laughed a little, reaching over to grab Snufkin’s hand with his right and gently tug him towards Moominhouse. “Anyway, you’re just in time to eat some of Mamma’s strawberry pie, and then you can tell us all about your winter!” 

“Ah,” Snufkin startled a bit as he was pulled forward, coming back to himself in time to take a step. He put a smile on his face, his brain catching up with what Moomin had just said. “I’ll be happy to tell you about my travels. But first, how are things with you?” 

“Hm?” Moomin seemed surprised by the question, his eyes widening as he looked at him. “With me? Nothing really happens over winter, you know that. Oh, Snorkmaiden and I woke up for the midwinter bonfire again this year, but still – nothing special.” 

“Oh?” Snufkin asked, his heart pounding in his chest. What a perfect lead in to this next question. “Nothing’s changed between you and Snorkmaiden, then?” 

Moomin creased his brows together, staring at him oddly as they kept walking. “What would change? I mean, sure, we got into a  _ little _ argument at the bonfire, but we made up.” 

“You’re sure?” 

“Very.” Moomin nodded, smiling again. “I carved a little wooden statue of her doing ballet to apologize, and she really liked it!” 

“Oh, that’s good.” Snufkin’s head spun like a globe. If they made up, then why was his string severed? This wasn’t adding up, he needed to see Snorkmaiden. Maybe they just needed a little help reconnecting? It wouldn’t be the first time. 

“Snufkin?” Moomin stopped them before the bridge, lifting up his left hand to inspect it as the little string flitted back and forth. “Do I have a bald spot on my hand or something? You keep looking at it.” 

“Oh, no, sorry. Just looking into space, is all.” 

—

Snufkin went to see Snorkmaiden the next day, hoping to hear more about the bonfire incident from her, and was disappointed when she repeated pretty much the same thing. Only with some added gushing over the statue she received, and her going on about how thoughtful a gift it was. 

But the thing that made his stomach drop was the sight of her left hand. She didn’t have a severed string like Moomin. Instead, her string was as bright and shiny as if she’d never met her soulmate, and it was pulled taut in a southern direction as if calling her to come find them. 

He made an excuse that he had to go fish immediately and practically ran out of her house. None of this was making sense! Soulmates didn’t just  _ stop _ being soulmates, that’s not how things were done! And even if they did just  _ stop, _ why would one half be left untethered while the other received a new love? Who could Snorkmaiden even be tied to? Someone who previously had a severed string? Then why wasn’t Moomin attached to someone else? 

Not even fishing could help clear his mind. After a few hours, he still felt confused and frustrated, wishing he knew where to find the answers. 

“Snufkin!” Moomin’s voice caused his ear to twitch, and he looked behind him to see Moomin running up to him with that same, huge smile of his. The poor troll; he had no idea of the cruel trick Fate had played on him. But if Moomin was really meant to be a loner now, then why wasn’t he able to see the strings? 

“Hello, Moomintroll.” Snufkin smiled, trying to keep his inner thoughts hidden as Moomin sat on the grass beside him. “Here to join me?” 

Moomin nodded, grinning wider as he said, “I had a feeling you’d be here. I’m just glad I was right – I feel like I’ve won some kind of prize.” 

Snufkin laughed, turning back to his pole as his smile relaxed. As long as Moomin was happy, maybe he should just stop worrying about the strings. The troll was loved by many others, anyway. “A prize, you say?” 

“Mmhm.” Moomin looked off into the distance, spreading his hands apart. “A prize for winning the game, ‘Guess Where the Elusive Mumrik Has Gone.’“ 

Snufkin couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled out of his throat. He loved how ridiculous Moomin could be at times. “I’m not that elusive.” 

“Not anymore,” Moomin agreed, playfully elbowing Snufkin’s side. “Not to me. Not to brag, but I think I’ve become an expert after all these years.” 

“An expert at finding me?” Snufkin raised a brow at him, grinning a bit. “Is that a challenge?” 

Moomin puffed out his chest before nodding. “Maybe it is.” 

“Mm.” Snufkin reeled in his line as he said, “Perhaps a game of hide and seek is in order.” 

Moomin brightened and hopped to his feet. “I’ll tell the others!”

Snufkin chuckled, turning his head to tease Moomin before he could run off, but the words never came out. He was distracted by strings yet again, and the sight he saw was enough to make his heart stop. 

Moomin’s string had tied itself to his own. 


	2. He Can Fix This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin is freaking out. He'd never wanted to break up a soulmate pair, and there had to be a way to fix it. Maybe a trip to a nearby library would tell him how?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly wasn't planning on writing more for this, but a few people on tumblr really enjoyed it so... now you get more.   
> Comments do help that motivation sometimes, everyone XD

_ "Don't act like you're not a little happy.'" _

_ I never wanted this! _

_ "Never, you say?" _

_ Fleeting thoughts don't count! _

_ "Fleeting?" _

_ Dreams don't count either! I would never purposefully break up a soulmate pair -- I'm not  _ that  _ arrogant! _

Snufkin groaned out loud, pulling at the skin under his eyes as he let his forehead thunk against an oak tree. His pack was heavy on his shoulders and he felt much too hot in the spring's noon sun, but he couldn't go back to Moominvalley yet. He needed more time to think, more time to process the fact that his red string was no longer severed.

He still couldn't believe it. He could no longer see the bow knot that now tied his string to Moomin's since they were so far away from each other, but his string was still suspended in the air and disappearing into the horizon. Instead of flapping gaily in the wind like it did for the first twenty years of his life.

_ It just doesn't make sense. _

_ "Does it have to? It's reality now." _

_ There has to be a way to set everything back to the way it was. _

_ "Why would you want it to?" _

_ Oh, don't start! _ Snufkin groaned again and lifted his head so he could stomp off. He was sure he had a nasty look on his face, but he didn't care right now. No one important was around to see him anyway.

There must be someone he could talk to about this! Someone who knew more about the Red Strings, or at least might have heard of something similar happening before. But as Snufkin ran through a mental list in his mind, he realized that the closest person with a severed string he could think of was Moss, and they were at least a two week's journey away. Usually he wouldn't hesitate to start a new course, but it was the start of spring and he hadn't even spent a week in Moominvalley yet. 

Snufkin swallowed, lifting his left hand up to stare at the tight, red string around his ring finger. He could just imagine the way those soft, blue eyes would well up with tears if he said he'd be gone for over a month. He could imagine the sad smile and the little head nod as empty words came out of those small lips,  _ 'Of course, Snufkin. Do hurry back, though?' _ And he'd reply  _ 'Of course, Moomintroll. I won't be too long.' _ And his heart would ache as he left, and not just because he'd be thinking of Moomin's feelings.

Snufkin straightened, his fur standing on end as he shook his head. He pushed himself to start walking again, and to think thoughts instead of linger on feelings.

_ Maybe I can send Moss a letter. There'd be no guarantee when or if they'd get it, but it's the best solution right now. In the meantime, I could head to a library to find something about the strings -- yes, that would be good, wouldn't it? The others could come with, too; Moomin would love the few days of travel, Snorkmaiden is always looking for new stories, and Sniff and Little My -- well, they'd entertain themselves. _

Snufkin took a deep breath, starting to calm down. That's right; he was sure he'd find a solution. By this time next year, Moomin and Snorkmaiden would be tied together like before, and he would no longer have to feel guilty. 

\---

"I can't believe we're going to a library!" Snorkmaiden exclaimed as she skipped beside Snufkin, a small pack of food on her back. "What a brilliant idea -- I can't even remember the last time we've gone!"

"Yes, that's what makes it a good trip." Snufkin smiled good naturedly, trying hard not to stare at the way Snorkmaiden's new string was pulling her in the direction they were headed. He just prayed that her new "soulmate" wasn't at the library; that would just complicate this whole mess even further.

"What kind of books should I get?" Snorkmaiden hummed to herself, looking over her shoulder to call out, "What do you think, Moomin?"

"What?" Moomin had one eye closed, thanks to Little My climbing about on his head and snout and pushing this way and that on his skin. 

Snufkin took a moment to admire Little My’s own String of Fate wrapped around her tiny finger. It wasn’t pulled quite as tight as Snorkmaiden’s, because Little My’s soulmate was a bit closer to the valley. They’d met during a summer party, and haven’t had much time to spend together otherwise; another nice little mymble girl who also liked pranks and spying. They were the perfect example of platonic soulmates, highlighted by her string being a lovely purple rather than red. 

"Sorry,” Moomin mumbled, still struggling with Little My crawling around on his head. “I'm a bit -- oh, Little My! Would you please get off?"

"Well I'd take a ride on Sniff instead," Little My huffed, finally sitting still with her arms crossed. "But his head is so small."

"Hey!" Sniff started feeling at his skull self-consciously. Snufkin was amazed that he had a soulmate tied to him (romantic or otherwise), but to the best of his knowledge they hadn’t met yet. “It’s not that small.” 

Little My snickered before crawling forward, putting her hands on Moomin’s snout and tilting her head so she could stare upside-down into Moomin’s eye. “I’d be happy to ride in the basket you’re carrying.” 

“If I let you ride there, you’d eat all our food,” Moomin deadpanned. 

“I wouldn’t eat  _ all _ of it. Snorkmaiden’s carrying some, after all.” 

Moomin rolled his eyes before grabbing Sniff’s arm and pulling him along so they could walk closer to Snufkin and Snorkmaiden. “Nice try, Little My, but you’ll have to wait until the rest of us start eating, too.” He let go of Sniff so he could walk next to Snorkmaiden, smiling warmly. “What were you saying, love?” 

Snorkmaiden giggled at the petname, while Little My pretended to gag. “I was just wondering what books I should get.” 

“Hm.” Moomin hummed, putting a hand to the tip of his snout as he thought. “Well, I know you like your romances, but maybe you’d enjoy some mysteries this time?” 

“Ooh!” Snorkmaiden’s eyes lit up at the idea. “Great idea! I might even get a few thrillers -- as long as I don’t read them at night, you know?” 

Moomin’s smile turned uneasy. “Right… and as long as they’re not too violent?” 

“Oh, some violence is fine.” 

“Emphasis on  _ some.” _

“Oh, you have such a soft heart.” Snorkmaiden chuckled, taking Moomin’s hand in her own. 

It would have been a romantic sight, if not for the fact that a little red bow was flapping against Snorkmaiden’s back, stubbornly connecting Snufkin and Moomin together no matter how much Snufkin tried to ignore it. 

Moomin and Snorkmaiden were still girlfriend and boyfriend; that hadn’t changed, thank goodness. Snufkin would feel even worse if this whole mess had somehow influenced them to break up. They just needed to keep dating long enough for Snufkin to set these strings right again. 

“What about you, Snufkin?” 

“What?” Snufkin startled, turning to look at Moomin and hating that his heart skipped a beat at the sight of that handsome smile. 

“What books are you getting?” Moomin tilted his head, his and Snorkmaiden’s connected hands swinging nicely as he spoke. “You must be looking for something to suggest the trip.” 

“Nothing in particular,” Snufkin lied easily enough, turning his head forwards again. “Just wanting to see what’s new.” 

“I’m going to get a cookbook!” Sniff interrupted with a grin. “I was thinking of opening up a restaurant -- what do you think?” 

“Can you even cook, Sniff?” Little My asked, raising a brow at him. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you make anything.” 

“Well, that’s why I’d be getting the cookbook. Obviously.” 

“Do you know the first thing about running a restaurant?” Snorkmaiden asked. “It’s not something to be taken lightly, you know! We’re not kids anymore.” 

“Of course I know that!” Sniff huffed, crossing his arms. “But all I’d need is a kitchen and a few tables and chairs!” 

“And where are you going to get that?” Moomin joined in. “You better not be expecting to use Moominouse for this operation. Mamma still hasn’t forgiven you for the slime incident.” 

“I’m telling you, there’s a market for glitter slime!” 

\---

After a full day of walking, it was time to set up camp for the night. Moomin and Snorkmaiden took care of the tents while Snufkin and Little My started the fire. Sniff started pulling food out of the packs, determined to show everyone he could cook and, honestly, the stew he made wasn’t that bad. 

“Snufkin’s is better,” Moomin informed him as he took another spoonful. “But it’s all right.” 

“It’s at least edible,” Little My half-complimented. “Which is honestly more than I was expecting.” 

“Hmph!” Sniff was proud anyway, his arms crossed over his chest with a big grin on his face. “Serves you all right for doubting me! I know what tastes good!” 

Snufkin couldn’t help but laugh a little. This was nice, travelling and sharing a meal with everyone. This felt normal. See? The red strings didn’t even have to mean anything. Nothing had to change. Maybe he was doing all this worrying for nothing. 

“Everyone?” Snorkmaiden piped up, looking at the two tents they’d set up with creased brows. “I just realized, how exactly are we all sleeping tonight?” 

“Well, obviously Moomin will sleep with Snufkin in his tent,” Little My spoke as if she was answering a stupid question. “And the rest of us will be in the yellow one.” 

“Why is that how it has to be?” Snorkmaiden frowned. 

“Because Snufkin’s tent is only big enough for two?” Little My raised a brow. “And Moomin’s the only one he trusts enough.” 

“That’s not true,” Snufkin argued. He swore he could feel his heartbeat in his hand, pounding against the constricting string on his finger. “I let guests stay in my tent for a night. If the weather’s bad.” 

“You don’t think we all could fit in the yellow one?” Sniff asked, tilting his head as he inspected the tents now. 

“It’d be a tight squeeze,” Moomin admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “By which I mean, I couldn’t sleep comfortably when both Mamma and Pappa were in that tent.” 

“So, Moomin stays with Snufkin.” Little My shrugged. “Problem solved.” 

“Oh, but…” Snorkmaiden turned her sad eyes to Moomin, whispering, “I wanted to sleep next to you.” 

Moomin’s cheeks turned a faint pink. He took Snorkmaiden’s hand in his, smiling softly as he assured quietly, “There will be other nights. I wouldn’t want to stick Snufkin with Sniff, after all -- they’re not exactly close.” 

Snorkmaiden sighed, scooting closer to nuzzle against Moomin’s snout. “Oh, I suppose.” 

Snufkin shoved a big spoonful of stew into his mouth so it wouldn’t seem odd that he wasn’t saying anything. But he didn’t even know what to say; it was true that he’d much rather prefer Moomin’s company than Sniff’s, but the sight of that red bow knot connecting them made his stomach tie itself in a different knot. If he wanted to set things back to normal, he should be encouraging Moomin and Snorkmaiden to spend as much time together as possible. How else would their strings reconnect? 

With that in mind, Snufkin swallowed and put a smile on his face. “I don’t mind having Sniff and Little My in my tent for the night if you two want some privacy.” 

“What!?” Little My exclaimed, jaw dropping. “Are you joking?” 

“No take-backs!” Sniff was ecstatic, already scrambling towards Snufkin’s tent. “I want the left corner!” 

“Hey!” Little My chased after him. “You can’t decide that on your own, I’m getting first dibs!” 

“Are you sure, Snufkin?” Moomin stared at his best friend with wide eyes, his ears fully raised. “You don’t have to make yourself uncomfortable for our sake.” 

Snufkin stayed smiling, even while he was already regretting his decision with all the racket Sniff and Little My were making. “I’m sure. You should be able to be with your girlfriend, after all.” 

“Oh, thank you, Snufkin!” Snorkmaiden beamed, nuzzling against Moomin’s cheek again before standing. “I think I’ll head to bed too -- see you soon?” 

“Be there in a sec,” Moomin promised, waving her off before turning back to Snufkin. He was clearly confused as he tilted his head, one ear laying flat. “You didn’t have to do that, you know.” 

“I know.” Snufkin shrugged, stirring his stew around. He wasn’t hungry anymore. “But I wanted to.” 

They sat together in silence, the crackles of the dying fire occasionally making themselves known. 

“Snufkin,” Moomin started, scooting closer. His voice was so low it was making Snufkin’s ears burn. “I know that Snorkmaiden and I aren’t always… we have our problems sometimes, but every couple does. And I know you’ve helped us reconcile in the past, but we’re fine now -- you don’t need to worry.” 

“I’m not worrying.” Snufkin laughed softly, hoping it was light enough to hide the growing sense of dread he felt. His eyes flitted down towards that little red bow again before he looked up into Moomin’s eyes. “I simply don’t want to cause extra hardship.” 

Moomin shook his head, reaching over to take Snufkin’s hand and squeeze it. Normally, Snufkin wouldn’t even bat an eyelash at the motion, but tonight he felt his breath hitch. 

“Snufkin, if Snorkmaiden and I were meant to be, then we’d be. With or without ‘extra hardship.’ But we need to be able to stand on our own, you know? If we rely on other people to ‘fix’ our relationship all the time, well… then that would mean we aren’t strong enough together, right?” 

Snufkin had nothing to say. Because he believed in what Moomin was saying, one hundred percent. It was why he usually didn’t care if he saw a soulmate pair arguing; if they were meant to be together, if they  _ wanted _ to be together, then they’d figure something out and communicate. But this wasn’t a normal situation! He’d obviously done something to cause Fate to disconnect their strings, which meant he needed to fix it. 

“And,” Moomin continued when Snufkin didn’t say anything. “On a different note, I really,  _ really _ don’t want you to make yourself uncomfortable for my sake. I know Sniff drains your -- what did you call it -- your social meter?” 

Snufkin laughed softly, slowly turning his hand over to squeeze Moomin’s hand back. Moomin really did know him best, something he usually felt good about. “Yes, that’s right.” 

“So, I don’t want you to feel too drained.” Moomin smiled softly. “Not when we still have a lot of walking to do tomorrow.” 

“I promise I’ll be fine.” Snufkin turned to look into Moomin’s eyes again, his heart throbbing painfully in his chest. “We’ll be sleeping, after all. That always resets me.” 

“I suppose.” Moomin squeezed Snufkin’s hand one last time before letting him go, stretching his arms above his head as he yawned. “All right then. I’ll help you clean up a bit before heading in myself.” 

“I can take care of it,” Snufkin assured. His heart couldn’t take much more kindness from his best friend. “Get your rest.”


	3. Research

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin finds exactly what he's looking for at the library. Unfortunately, the conclusion he draws from the book he found might not be the best.

The nearest library to Moominvalley was actually fairly grand. It was twice the width and length of Mrs. Fillyjonk’s home and the same height as Moominhouse, all while being made from a combination of black granite and white marble. The front entrance was enclosed by two stone lions, standing tall and regal, and there were windows all along the building for plenty of natural light. It was one of Clemence Town’s most popular destinations, made more obvious by the hotel located within eyesight from the place. 

“It’s even more beautiful than I remember.” Snorkmaiden’s hands were clasped together as she looked up at the library, Little My perched on her head and looking just as dazzled. 

“It looks like they’re adding onto the west wing, too!” Sniff pointed out a pile of construction materials off to the side, as well as a tarp draping over a fairly large part of the building. 

“Well.” Moomin clapped his hands, walking forwards and putting one foot on the white steps before turning to his friends with a big smile. “Enough dawdling. Let’s get reading!” 

Snufkin chuckled softly as he walked with the group. Seemed Moomin was in a “leading” mood today; that should be fun. “And what kind of books will you be perusing, Moomintroll?” 

“Adventure books, of course!” Moomin exclaimed, pumping his fist in the air. “Maybe I’ll find a treasure map! Or a quest for some long-lost magical item!” 

“Mm, I see.” Snufkin grinned, teasing, “So Pappa didn’t ask you to find popular adventure books so he could jazz up his own memoirs?” 

Moomin tensed up, his fist still in the air for a few steps before he sighed and pointed at him. “You must have been eavesdropping before we left.” 

“Is it really eavesdropping if Pappa’s voice carries?” 

“Yes!” 

Snufkin snickered softly before holding his finger up to his mouth. “Shh. We’re about to enter a library.” 

“Oh, since when are you one for rules?” Moomin gently pushed at his shoulder before bounding ahead just to open the door for everyone. 

“Well, maybe I —” Snufkin’s voice cut out, his eyes fixated on the sight of their strings. More importantly, the sight of their connected strings glowing a few shades brighter than before. He felt his blood run cold. That little amount of playful banter affected them that much?? How was that possible! That was normal for them! 

“Snufkin?” Snorkmaiden’s face came into his line of sight, her eyebrows creased in worry. “You’re looking pale. Did you eat enough for breakfast?” 

“He looks like he’s going to collapse any minute!” Little My shouted. 

“Oh no!” Sniff started looking around for a chair. “There’s a bench over there!” 

“Do you need me to carry you?” Moomin offered, looking about as panicked as Snufkin felt. 

“I’m fine,” Snufkin assured, trying to smile. It was tricky when your cheeks felt numb. “Maybe it’s just a bit too hot — I’m sure I’ll feel better once we’re inside.” He took a step forward, and while it might have been a bit stiff thanks to his tingling feet, he didn’t fall. He considered that a win, and he quickly kept walking until his hand was on the door. “See? I’m not going to fall. Everyone should just go find the books they want.” 

Moomin frowned, following close behind him as they all walked inside. “Are you sure?” Moomin whispered close to Snufkin’s ear, that warm breath unfortunately sending shivers down his chilled spine. “I can stay with you for a few minutes at least.” 

Snufkin swallowed, resisting the urge to scratch at his ear and neck as he turned to smile at Moomin once more. “I will be fine. Go find your adventure books.” 

“But —” 

“I’ll be seeing you!” Snufkin quickly disappeared behind a nearby shelf before breaking into a run. Which maybe wasn’t the best idea when you could barely feel your legs, but Snufkin knew what he was doing. Most of the time. 

* * *

Since the library was so expansive, it took Snufkin a few moments to find the mythology section, and even longer to find books that talked about soulmates of any kind. He was surprised by the sheer amount of false ways to identify soulmates; soul marks, hearts glowing from proximity, and even soulmates being able to feel each other’s pain and develop scars from each other. He was glad that last one wasn’t true, he’d hate to imagine Moomin feeling his pain whenever he sprained an ankle. 

Wait, what was he thinking? He wasn’t Moomin’s soulmate to begin with. 

When he did find a few books that mentioned the Red Strings, he’d carried them over to a private table to begin his research. Most of them told him what he already knew; simple basics on what the Red String of Fate was, how most people couldn’t see them, and the minimal influence it had on a person’s choices. Meaning that just because you had a soulmate didn’t mean you were guaranteed to find them, or end up with them in the long run. Supposedly, if a person is open to the idea of soulmates, the string can help you “know” you’ve met your perfect match, but many people have a habit of rationalizing such “knowledge” as infatuation or some other thing. 

Some of them mentioned those that had multiple strings, which Snufkin had only personally witnessed twice. He often wondered how much more difficult it would be to find two or even three soulmates rather than the one, and he was glad that he at least didn’t have that to worry about. 

Most of them also mentioned those with severed strings. Some phrased this as a tragedy and something to be pitied, while others took it in a more hopeful and curious light. Hypothesizing that having a severed string meant a person had so much love to give that they just couldn’t be tied down to one person, or that they simply found fulfillment from life’s other wonders rather than fellow creatures. They were honestly fascinating to read, but none of them were talking about what it meant if a soulmate pair’s string snapped. Or, more importantly, how to fix it. 

Snufkin slammed his third book shut before rubbing at his eyes. He’d find something, he had to. This was his mess and he needed to clean it up for Moomin’s sake. He’d never be able to forgive himself if he was the cause of Moomin being unhappy. 

Snufkin took a deep breath to calm himself, his eyes glancing down yet again to the string on his finger. It was still brighter than it was that morning, and Snufkin felt his stomach drop into his shoes as he considered the implications of that. He may not know exactly how to get Moomin and Snorkmaiden together again, but he had a feeling that strengthening his bond with Moomin was  _ not _ going to help. If anything, he probably needed to weaken their bond, even if his heart ached at the thought of seeing their strings turn just one shade darker. He had no right to feel like that anyway; he wasn’t supposed to be tied to Moomin in the first place! 

With a groan, Snufkin reached for the fourth book he’d grabbed and began paging through it. Maybe this one held the answers? 

It didn’t, of course. But the sixth book, entitled simply  All About Soulmates _ , _ had exactly what he was looking for. 

_ “While rare, it is possible for soulmates to reject each other completely and sever their string. The reasons for doing this are limitless, and can vary wildly from couple to couple, but it usually takes many years to reach this point. Fate isn’t so easily broken and will try to keep its pairs together for as long as possible, but if both halves of the pair feel like Fate got it wrong, then their bond is released.  _

_ “Most of the time a severed soulmate pair will simply stay severed. Many of them might not even realize this has happened and stay together anyway, because ultimately it is up to each individual to choose what kind of relationship they want with fellow creatures. Remember, just because Fate tries to help you out, doesn’t mean you have to listen.  _

_ “Another possibility is for the severed pair to find others with a severed string and connect with them instead. It’s unclear how or why this happens; it could be Fate deciding to try its hand again, or it could simply be a case of creatures choosing their own destiny. Either way, if this happens the two strings tie to each other like shoelaces and, with time, can either separate like before, or entwine so completely that it’s impossible to tell the strings were severed in the first place.  _

_ “It is also possible for the severed pair to connect with someone who currently has another soulmate, or reconnect with their original soulmate — though both of these are more unlikely.” _

Snufkin could hardly believe it. Here it was, pretty much everything he needed to know: their severed strings could separate nice and easy, and Moomin and Snorkmaiden could reconnect. Sure, the book said it wasn’t likely, but what did it know? Surely this was too rare an occurrence to make such claims, and besides, if Snufkin was actively trying to set things right again then Fate should be on his side. 

Feeling hopeful, Snufkin tucked his current book under his arm and deposited the rest of them on a return cart. He might as well check this one out; it might give him more ideas on how to go about correcting this mess. Help him figure out how to make Moomin and Snorkmaiden choose each other again. 

Plus, now he knew that his intuition was right. If he wanted to set things back to normal, he needed to weaken his own bond with Moomin, no matter how hard that might be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the chapter's so short, but this is a good place to cut it for now!  
> I have the next few chapters written out already, but I'm holding off in case I want to change some things. (I might even end up changing this chapter, but we'll see).  
> I hope everyone is still enjoying this ^-^ (Also, prepare yourselves for chapter 6).


	4. Unexpected

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin's self-assigned mission has just become more difficult.

Snufkin had absolutely no clue how to weaken his relationship with Moomin. Or, more precisely, he had no idea on how to weaken it without completely ruining it. He still wanted to be Moomin’s best friend, after all, so he couldn’t just start being mean to him for no reason. He tried simply keeping his distance and only spending time with Moomin in a group setting, but that just resulted in their string not changing at all. So, then he tried subtly suggesting that Moomin and Snorkmaiden spend almost all of their time together.  _ “Perfect day for a picnic, maybe you should make one for Snorkmaiden?” “The tide is nice and low. Don’t you think Snorkmaiden would like to go for a swim?” “How about I play a nice waltz so you and Snorkmaiden can dance?” _ He figured this would be the most effective method, since he also needed Snorkmaiden’s string to untie itself again. That shouldn’t be too difficult, since her “new” soulmate was nowhere near them, so he was hoping that once he untied his and Moomin’s strings that Snorkmaiden’s would simply follow suit. 

It seemed to be working. The string around Snufkin’s finger was at least back to its original brightness, and anytime he saw Moomin and Snorkmaiden together they always seemed relaxed and happy. Actually, they didn’t seem to be fighting at all this year, which Snufkin considered a blessing. He felt even more hopeful; if he just kept his distance things were sure to be back to normal in no time at this rate. 

Which is why it came as such a shock when Moomin told him that he and Snorkmaiden broke up. 

“What?” Snufkin dropped his fire-poking stick. It was a late, summer night, the stars shining brightly down on them and the dim glow of a dwindling bonfire between them. 

“I know it might seem sudden.” Moomin had a sheepish smile on his face, both ears flattened against his head. He’d come to visit Snufkin at his tent, saying he had something he wanted to discuss with him privately. 

Snufkin wished he would have pretended to be asleep. 

“Especially when I told you we were fine in the beginning of the year,” Moomin added with a soft sigh. “But… well, Snorkmaiden and I have been talking about it for a few days now.” 

“A few days?” Snufkin’s mouth was dry. “And this is the first I’m hearing about it?” 

“Well, it’s not like we started by talking about breaking up,” Moomin explained, tracing circles into the dirt with his finger. “We just noticed that whenever we talked about ‘the future,’ we had different ideas. So, we started by writing down what we envisioned for ourselves and for each other, and then we exchanged them.” 

Snufkin could hardly believe his ears. Maybe this was rude of him to think, but what Moomin was describing sounded far too  _ mature _ for either of them. 

“Mamma gave us the idea.” 

Ah, that made more sense. 

“Anyway.” Moomin straightened, looking up to catch Snufkin’s eyes. “Once we did that, the differences were striking. Snorkmaiden had ideas of doing things like college, or enrolling in a theater troupe, or becoming a famous singer, or starting a business of some sort. And I, well… what I want is more simple, honestly. I just want to explore a bit, see what’s out there — maybe sail for awhile, or be a travelling wood carver. I’ve gotten quite good at that over the years.” Moomin chuckled softly, looking up at the stars. “We agreed on one thing; marriage wasn’t on our minds at all. Which was a surprise to me, because Snorkmaiden was really into talking about our wedding when we were kids. But, I guess things can change when you grow.” 

“But…” Snufkin was at a loss for words, and he was quickly losing feeling in his limbs. “But you both seem so happy together.” 

“Well, we’re still friends.” Moomin hugged his legs to his chest, resting his snout on his knees. “And we still care deeply for each other. That was one thing we talked a lot about — that we wanted to support each other in whatever decisions we made.” 

“But.” Snufkin clenched his teeth, trying not to scream. “But why not just stay together, then?” 

Moomin stared at Snufkin, and his unchanging expression was honestly unnerving. “I could just as easily ask ‘why stay together?’” He looked away, letting his legs fall into a crossed position instead. “That was something we talked about, too. We agreed that we could probably make a happy life together. Building a house, starting a family, all that — we weren’t outrightly opposed to it. But a different question nagged our minds: ‘Would we be happier doing something else?’ And the answer was… yes.”

Snufkin’s vision was starting to blur, his head light and dizzy. No, no, this was all wrong; this wasn’t supposed to happen. They were soulmates! They had to get back together — maybe they just needed someone to help them figure out how to make it work? Maybe that’s why Moomin had come to him, he wanted Snufkin to help him mend their relationship. Yes, that had to be it! 

All thought left his mind when he heard Moomin sniffle, a few tears trailing down the fur of his snout. Snufkin’s heart throbbed painfully at the sight; Moomin crying was one of the things he’d do anything to prevent. “Hey,” Snufkin whispered, crawling over so he could wrap his arms around Moomin’s neck in a loose hug. “You’ll be all right.” 

“I know.” Moomin started to shake slightly as he wrapped his arms around Snufkin’s waist, pulling him close as more tears fell. “I’m not crying because we broke up, I’m crying because… because I couldn’t make it work? Because I’m not the best for her? That probably doesn’t make sense. I just… I want to be enough for someone, you know?” 

“You’re enough,” Snufkin whispered, closing his eyes as he rubbed circles into Moomin’s upper back with his palm. “I promise you’re enough.” 

Moomin let out a sob before clenching his teeth, hugging Snufkin even tighter. They stayed just like that for a long while, clinging to each other as Moomin’s tears landed heavy on Snufkin’s tunic or into the dirt, and Snufkin rubbing simple circles against that soft, white fur. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier,” Moomin whispered, still sniffling a bit. “It just felt like this was something I had to decide by myself. Er, not all by myself — with her. And I guess a part of me didn’t want to disappoint you, because you’ve been so supportive of us lately. Actually, way more verbally supportive than I ever remember you being before? If you were hoping to attend a wedding soon, then I’m really, really sorry—” 

“Hey.” Snufkin pulled away just enough to wipe at the trails of tears across Moomin’s cheeks, staring into those big, blue eyes. “This isn’t about me, okay? Just tell me how you’re feeling.” 

Moomin sniffled again, closing his eyes as Snufkin caressed his face. “Sad. But… but good overall, I think. It hurts now, but I really do think this is for the best.” 

Snufkin’s stomach started tying itself in knots again. For the best? What would be best is if Snufkin had figured out how to reconnect Moomin’s string with Snorkmaiden’s long before now. They probably wouldn’t be feeling like this if he’d managed to do that. 

“Time heals all wounds.” Snufkin smiled softly. “Who knows? Maybe after awhile you two can try again.” 

Moomin gave a wet laugh, more tears trailing down into Snufkin’s hands. “You really did think we’d get married, didn’t you.” 

“Well… it can still happen.” 

Moomin sighed softly, gently pushing Snufkin away so he could wipe at his own face. “Snufkin, it’s not happening. I know that probably doesn’t hold much weight right now because I’m crying, but… this wasn’t a decision we took lightly. Snorkmaiden and I just aren’t the best for each other, and we’re okay with that, and, and I need you to be okay with that, too.” 

Snufkin grit his teeth, taking in Moomin’s firm tone and resolved eyes. He really did believe that he was doing the right thing, but Snufkin  _ couldn’t  _ be “okay” with them breaking up. Not when he knew how things were supposed to be, not when he was the cause of all this mess. Moomin was simply wrong about this, he just didn’t know it yet. “All right, Moomin,” he whispered, playing along for now, “I believe you.” 

Moomin’s shoulders lost some of their tension, and the young troll took a deep breath. “Thank you. That… that means a lot.” 

Snufkin matched his smile, even as his eyes drifted between them. Of course their string was shining like a star; why wouldn’t it be? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so, I want you all to know that this story is becoming a lot longer than I first though. The chapters are short now, but chapter 6 and beyond they get a lot longer!   
> I feel like I should make it more clear that there /will/ be angst very soon (and a bit later), but there will also be a happy ending. I'm not trying to trick people into expecting pure angst or pure fluff.   
> I hope everyone's continuing to enjoy <3 Because I definitely am XD


	5. An Unexpected Ally

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Little My figures out what Snufkin's been trying to do all year, and offers her help for inconclusive reasons.

Snufkin didn’t understand it. The next few days after learning about the breakup, he couldn’t help but watch Moomin and Snorkmaiden when they all hung out in a group, and they were acting pretty much the same. They still smiled and greeted each other, and conversation flowed at a decent pace with plenty of laughter. The only difference was that they seemed a bit awkward about holding hands or hugging now, even though they both did that with their other friends. 

Honestly, it made Snufkin more frustrated. Couldn’t they have just stayed together for a bit longer? If they cared about each other so much and there was no one else, why choose to be single? 

_ “Like you’re one to talk?”  _

_ I chose to be single because I didn’t want to interfere with any soulmate pairs.  _

_ “Then why didn’t you ever date someone else with a severed string?”  _

_ They weren’t my type.  _

_ “Oh, your type?”  _

_ Don’t start. _ Snufkin pulled his hat further over his head, wondering if he could walk away from their afternoon of mushroom picking without anyone noticing. 

“Can we make some poisons this time?” Little My asked, grinning and holding up a bright red mushroom cap. 

Moomin visibly jumped away from it, snapping, “For the last time, we are not making poisons! Put that thing down!” 

“You should wash your hands in the stream, Little My,” Snorkmaiden added, gently poking at the mushroom with a stick so she’d drop it. “You don’t know what it’s capable of.” 

Little My rolled her eyes before tossing the mushroom behind her. “Fine. Scaredy cats.” 

Moomin sighed in relief, turning back around. “Do we have enough yet, Sniff?” 

“I think so!” Sniff chirped, holding a large basket half-full of mushrooms with a big smile on his face. “Just you wait, I’ll make these so delicious that Mamma will  _ have _ to let me use her kitchen for my restaurant!” 

“I can’t believe you’re still on this.” Moomin crossed his arms, grinning softly. “Thought you would have moved on to a different idea by now.” 

“Mamma told me that if I can make a five-star menu, then I’m in!” Sniff reminded, waddling over with his basket. “I’ve gotta give it my best shot, right?” 

“You’re not even past the appetizers yet.” Little My shook her head, shaking some water off her hands. “I say he’ll give up in another month.” 

“Says you!” Sniff stuck his tongue out at her, almost tripping over his feet. 

Moomin came over and took the basket from him, easily holding it from the bottom with one hand. “Let me carry it back. Wouldn’t want you to break an ankle or something.” 

“Thanks, Moomin!” Sniff beamed and gave him a quick hug before skipping off. “Dinner’s on me tonight!” 

“Are you sure you don’t want to cook with me?” Snorkmaiden asked, walking next to him with a pout. “I’ve become quite an expert, you know!” 

“Thank you, Snorkmaiden, but I want to do this myself!” Sniff pounded a fist on his chest. “Besides, I want food with a bit more flavor.” 

Snorkmaiden jolted, narrowing her eyes at him. “And what’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Sometimes your food is bland, that’s all.” 

Snorkmaiden’s fur turned a brilliant shade of green all at once, her fists shaking slightly. “You take that back  _ right this minute.” _

“What? What did I say?” 

“Ugh!” Snorkmaiden threw her hands up before stomping ahead. “Men!” 

“Sniff, you like Snorkmaiden’s food,” Moomin reprimanded, frowning. “Why’d you say that?” 

“I’m just being honest!” 

“You should go apologize.” 

“I’m sure she’s fine.” Sniff crossed his arms. “If you’re so worried, go check on her. You’re her boyfriend, not me.” 

“Sniff.” Moomin’s ear twitched softly as he flicked the back of Sniff’s head. “We broke up. We’re just friends. Remember? I told you last night? And the night before that?” 

“Right.” Sniff rubbed at his head. “Sorry. Forgot again.” 

“You could still check on her,” Snufkin spoke up, albeit softly. “Since you are friends.” His eyes drifted down just as Little My turned to give him an inquisitive look, but he quickly looked away to smile calmly at Moomin instead. “I’m sure she’d appreciate it.” 

“Mm…” Moomin rubbed the back of his neck, admitting, “I’m not sure how to comfort her without cuddling.” 

“Just let her rant a bit,” Little My advised with a shrug. “That always helps me feel better.” 

“Friends can cuddle,” Snufkin added, once again feeling Little My’s eyes on him. “So if the ranting doesn’t work, a hug is fine.” 

Moomin tapped at his chin, thinking that over. “I suppose.” He turned to glare at Sniff. “But  _ you _ better still apologize later.” 

“Okay, I will!” Sniff held his hands up in defense, grunting when the mushroom basket was shoved into his arms again. 

Once Moomin was out of earshot, Little My tugged on Snufkin’s pants. “Mind telling me what  _ that _ was about?” 

“What do you mean?” Snufkin glanced down at her carelessly, hoping she couldn’t hear the fast pace of his heartbeat. 

“Don’t give me that.” She quickly crawled up his leg and back to perch on his shoulder. “You’ve been acting weird all year!” 

“Weird how?” He’d learned long ago that the best defense with Little My was to just continuously ask questions. 

“Weird as in  _ way _ too invested in Moomin and Snorkmaiden’s relationship.” Little My began poking his cheek over and over as she talked. “Weird as in you haven’t once asked Moomin to go someplace with you without everyone else around, which is really strange because you hate being around too many people for too long.” 

“You all are fine,” Snufkin defended, putting his hand up to stop her small finger from jabbing him. “That rule mainly applies to parties.” 

“It’s still weird.” Little My crossed her arms. “By this time of the year I should be teasing you and Moomin about spending every morning and night together. But I’ve barely seen you with him at all! And, honestly, I thought you’d be a little happy about them breaking up.” 

Snufkin’s stomach shrunk, and he was acutely aware of how his fingers were turning numb. “Why would I be happy about that?” 

“Because then you can have more of Moomin’s attention, duh.” Little My rolled her eyes. “And don’t even say that you don’t want it. Why else would you write him a new song every year?” 

Snufkin hoped his cheeks weren’t turning pink. “They’re not  _ only _ for him. I’d compose a new song anyway.” 

“Right. And the fact that Moomin is the first person you always play for means nothing.” 

“That’s correct.” 

“You are so full of it.” Little My rolled her eyes again. “This doesn’t have anything to do with that soulmate book you checked out at the library, does it?” 

Snufkin tensed up, his eyes widening as he looked at her. “How did you —?” 

“Come on, like you thought I wouldn’t rifle through your bag one of these days?” She grinned. “I thought you were hiding something, and it looks like I was right. What, do you think Moomin and Snorkmaiden are  _ soulmates? _ Is that why you’ve been so weird about them?” 

Snufkin huffed softly, taking a slow breath to calm his voice. “Well, it seems you’ve reached your own conclusions, so my opinion isn’t really needed.” 

“Oh, come on.” Little My put her hands on her hips, raising a brow at him. “You don’t  _ really _ believe in that soulmate crap, do you? Even if you did, what makes you the expert on it?” 

Snufkin wished he could reply to that question honestly. Instead, he simply looked away and muttered, “Of course I don’t believe in it. That book was just for fun.” 

“Then  _ why _ are you being so weird?” 

“Hey, guys!” Sniff whined, being a good distance behind them as he struggled with his mushrooms. “Wait for me!” 

“Oh, look at that.” Snufkin laughed softly, quickly turning and heading back towards Sniff. “Our dear friend needs our help. Let’s talk later, all right?” 

“I’ll hold you to that, you know!” Little My huffed. 

* * *

Little My’s stubbornness was something Snufkin had always admired about her. Except in this instance, when she refused to leave him alone for more than a few hours. It seemed like no matter where he went, she’d pop up and ask, “Can we talk about your weird behavior  _ now?” _ He’d usually make up an excuse and duck out, but sadly that only worked for two days. 

“Little My, I’m busy,” he tried to tell her. He’d just sat down to start fishing, and he didn’t really want to move. Maybe this time he’d simply ignore her until she went away. 

“Why won’t you just answer my question?” Little My huffed, using a stick to poke into his jar of worms. “All I want to know is why you’ve been acting so strange.” 

All Snufkin did was clench his teeth and stare at the river. 

Little My stared at him for a bit longer than normal, waiting for him to do something. But soon she rolled her eyes and stretched her arms above her head. “Too bad. Because if you were trying to get Moomin and Snorkmaiden together again, I’d offer my help.” 

Snufkin felt his fur stand on end as he glanced at her. Maybe he’d regret engaging, but it wasn’t like he was succeeding on his own. “Your help?” 

“So that  _ is _ what you’re doing?” 

Snufkin hesitated, watching his bobber move up and down in the water as he weighed the pros and cons of trusting Little My. She was ruthless and resourceful, but was also prone to going rogue and forgoing plans in the heat of the moment. Especially if she wanted something else to happen. 

“They both love dancing,” Little My continued when Snufkin was quiet for too long. “I bet if we planned a fancy ball and got them to dance together, sparks would start flying again.” 

“Why are  _ you _ interested in this?” Snufkin narrowed his eyes at her. “What are you planning?” 

“Nothing much.” Little My leaned back on her hands so she could kick her legs up and down. “I just want to see how things will play out.” 

Snufkin stared at her for a bit longer, having a feeling he shouldn’t trust a word she was saying. “You don’t believe in soulmates.” 

“You said you don’t believe in them, either," she reminded. 

“I don’t.” 

“Good. Then we’re on the same page.” 

Snufkin resisted the urge to groan out loud as he closed his eyes. Maybe he was a fool to even consider trusting her, but he was quickly running out of options. Simply having Moomin and Snorkmaiden spend more time together hadn’t worked, possibly because the atmosphere wasn't right. Maybe Little My was onto something; if he could spark some of those romantic memories of each other, perhaps they’d want to try again. 

With a deep breath, Snufkin opened his eyes and turned to Little My. “A fancy ball, you say?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day everyone!! Sorry this chapter isn't especially fluffy, but just hold out a bit longer. ;)   
> (Also, I love writing Sniff just being... so self absorbed and oblivious).   
> In the meantime, just a reminder that chapter six is the most angsty/emotional chapter of this fic, so... again, prepare yourselves for that.


	6. What He Wanted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin finally succeeds in weakening his bond with Moomintroll.

The planning for the ball had taken almost two weeks even with the other Valley residents helping out. Mrs. Fillyjonk was in charge of the guest list since she knew many “highly respectable people” as she put it, Mr. Hemulen provided some beautiful flowers and ferns for decoration, Moomintroll and Moominpappa built a fairly large dance floor and small stage for the musicians, Moominmamma and Snorkmaiden helped mend and touch-up outfits, Sniff insisted on taking care of the catering (which Little My only agreed to under the condition that she supervise), and Snufkin prepared a few flute and violin pieces for the evening. The day of, everyone helped set up white-clothed tables with tall candles and sturdy chairs to surround the dance floor. 

Everything seemed to be going well. Snorkmaiden was especially excited to have an excuse to dress nicely and dance with strangers, and Snufkin simply prayed that she and Moomin would share a couple dances together. He knew what songs both of them liked, so he was sure he could manage somehow, and Little My said she’d run interference and encourage them to dance as well. 

The main gripe that Snufkin had with fancy parties were the outfits. Namely the stiff, uncomfortable suit that he had been stuffed into so he matched the other musicians. Mrs. Fillyjonk wouldn’t have let him play with her musical friends otherwise, and he’d much rather be sitting and playing than mingling. As if being surrounded by the suffocating heat of strangers wasn’t reason enough to dislike parties, it was also dizzying to see so many red strings strewn all over the place; varying levels of brightness and tautness, disappearing through people or looking as if they’d trip anyone who got close. He’d be glad to close his eyes and get lost in the music for the evening. 

“Mrs. Fillyjonk says the guests will arrive in a half hour,” Little My reported to Snufkin as he tuned his violin alongside the other musicians on stage. She was dressed in a fairly plain, red ballgown, with bright pink embellishments embroidered around the edges. Most surprising was her hair; it was styled down for once, the wavy, red locks reaching down to her ankles. “And the food will be ready in an hour, according to Sniff.” 

“Mm.” Snufkin nodded, glad for the familiar weight of his hat on his head. He’d gotten away with wearing it by finding a tie the same shade of green. “What did he make, again?” 

“Five courses: pea soup, cabbage rolls, a house salad, smoked perch with a side of steamed mushrooms and mashed potatoes, and lemon pie for dessert.” 

Snufkin’s fingers stopped against his strings, his eyes widening as he looked at her. “Sniff made all that?” 

“I’m just as surprised as you.” Little My shrugged. “He did get Mamma and Snorkmaiden to help with the actual cooking today, but he planned it and got the ingredients himself.” 

“Goodness.” Snufkin looked behind him towards Moominhouse, which looked quite cozy with all of the lights on, the darkening twilight sky behind it. “Well, good for him. What about the others?” 

“They’re all getting ready.” Little My rolled her eyes. “Honestly, what’s so difficult about dressing up? It only took me twenty minutes.” 

“Snufkin!” Moomin’s voice echoed as he ran from Moominhouse to the dance floor. His fur was all fluffy and clean from the bath he’d taken, and Mamma had found him a handsome, navy blue button-up shirt to wear underneath a white jacket. 

Snufkin smiled and waved, swallowing at the sight of their combined strings oscillating rapidly from the motion. He still wasn’t used to his string looking so bright and long, or becoming shorter with every step Moomin took towards him. 

“You look nice!” Moomin greeted once he was close enough, panting softly as his tail flicked back and forth. 

Snufkin chuckled lightly, nodding in appreciation. “You look very nice yourself.” 

“It’s so good to see you!” Moomin smiled wider. “We’ve been so busy setting this whole thing up that I feel like we’ve barely spent any time together.” 

“I’ll say.” Little My grinned at Snufkin before starting to walk off. “I’m going to check on Sniff.” 

“Oh, bye, Little My!” Moomin watched her leave for a moment before turning back to Snufkin, his smile so bright that Snufkin’s heart skipped a beat. “This really is exciting. I was surprised this was your and Little My’s idea, though — doesn’t really seem like your thing.” 

“Well,” Snufkin resumed tuning his violin, if only so he could focus on something other than how cute Moomin looked. “That’s what makes it some kind of adventure, right?” 

Moomin chuckled, looking around at all of the musicians tuning and preparing various instruments. He leaned in closer, his snout almost touching Snufkin’s nose as he asked, “Could we go somewhere a bit more quiet for a moment?” 

Snufkin’s mouth was dry, his eyes flitting back and forth across his violin strings so he wouldn’t look into those big, blue eyes. “Just for a moment. I still need to finish tuning.” 

Moomin brightened and offered his hand, those soft fingers enclosing so gently around Snufkin’s hand that it sent tingles up his arm. He was just glad that Moomin couldn’t feel how fast his heart was beating as they walked in silence, getting far enough away that the sounds of strings and horns died off, replaced by cicadas and crickets instead. 

“I really missed you.” Moomin’s voice was low, his ears twitching occasionally as he kept his head forwards. “After this party, could we hang out like old times? One on one?” 

Snufkin winced slightly, his heart clenching at Moomin’s hesitant tone. He wanted to agree, he wanted to say that he missed him, too, but the sight of their makeshift red string glistening in the setting sun made him swallow back any such words. “We’ll see what the cards have in store for us.” 

“Oh.” Moomin’s ears dropped even further, but the biggest indication that Snufkin’s words hit deep was the fact that their connected string started to dim. “It’s just… we really haven’t spent much time together these past few months. I guess some of that’s my fault, since Snorkmaiden and I needed time to work out our relationship, but…” His grip tightened around Snufkin’s hand, his head turning to look into Snufkin’s widened eyes. “Now I just want to be with my best friend.” 

Snufkin couldn’t breathe, and not just because this stupid dress shirt was far too constricting. He looked away, his free hand lifting to form a fist over his heart as he thought about what to say. He should just keep being vague; that seemed to be working, right? “I’m sure we’ll find some time to spend together. Don’t worry.” 

When their string started to turn even more dim and dark, Snufkin had to remind himself that it was actually a good thing. 

“Snufkin, do you…” Moomin trailed off, their string turning darker by the second. It only stopped changing when Moomin straightened, a forced smile on his face. “Never mind, you’re right. Let’s get you back to your instruments.” He let go of Snufkin’s hand so he could start running back. “Race you!” 

Snufkin laughed as he chased after him, though it was more hoarse than normal. Their string was completely dim and just a few shades shy of dried blood, and he almost felt nauseous from the sight. 

_ This is good. This is what I wanted. If our connection breaks, then he can reconnect with Snorkmaiden. We can go back to being uncomplicated friends, and everything will be back to normal. _

So why did it feel so wrong? 

* * *

When the ball officially started with Sniff’s prepared menu, everyone seemed to enjoy themselves. It was self-seating, which allowed the Moomin family, the Snorks, and Little My to sit together like normal. Snufkin had to chuckle at the sight of Moominpappa in a red-striped tie, because he kept pulling it loose and re-tightening it every other minute, clearly uncomfortable. But, he matched well with Moominmamma, who looked stunning in a ruffled, cream dress and a bright red, flowery hat, her signature black purse hanging on her chair. However, the most eye-catching sight to Snufkin was their own String of Fate connecting them; a bright, shiny, gold string as thick as a twig, showcasing a strong, enduring bond. Although he didn’t need to be able to see the strings to know that; their love always shone through in the looks they gave each other and the easy way they got along. 

The Snork chose a plain, black bow tie as his fancy wear, looking underdressed compared to everyone else. His string was dim and slightly fraying, as he spent more time hauled in his lab rather than interacting with anyone, much less the sweet, little hemulen he’d met at a summer science convention. Snorkmaiden had gone all out, wearing pearls and gold rings with a golden butterfly clip in her hair, and dressed in a brilliant, violet ball gown with that shimmering, scratchy material that Snufkin hated decorating the skirt. 

Sniff’s food was clearly a big hit. Everyone was smiling as they ate, and the joy only increased with each new dish. Sniff looked close to tears when the main course was served, and was actually crying into Moomin’s shoulder once dessert had reached all the tables. Snufkin hoped they were tears of joy, but it was hard to tell from the stage. The musicians had to play during the entire meal, of course, and afterwards they broke off one at a time to go eat so that a steady stream of music would be playing through the night. 

It’d been awhile since Snufkin had played music with a group, but he found himself enjoying it. The other musicians were very talented and kind, oscillating between a prepared piece and an improvised original that one of them took the lead on. He felt honored to be playing amongst them, and he probably would have felt more so if he wasn’t busy keeping an eye on Moomin and Snorkmaiden. 

They met on the dance floor occasionally, but Snorkmaiden was clearly more focused on dancing with new partners for almost every song, which of course prompted Moomin to find someone else to dance with. Though he usually stuck with people he knew, like Moominmamma, Little My, Sniff, or even Mrs. Fillyjonk once. 

Little My was staying true to her word and trying to get them to dance together, especially when a slower song started, but it wasn’t working too well. Whenever Moomin and Snorkmaiden did meet on the floor, they would talk and smile, or make hand gestures and laugh, and Snorkmaiden even turned yellow and pink a few times, but they stayed in an open dance position and didn’t get close like a couple should. It just wasn’t enough; neither of their strings were changing. 

As the night wore on, Snufkin felt panic rising in his throat. This was the best chance he had at setting things right; he needed to do  _ something _ to get the romance going. So, the next time he saw Moomin and Snorkmaiden meet for a dance, he told the other musicians to follow his lead for a song this time. 

When he played the first line on his violin, he saw Moomin tense up immediately, but Snufkin closed his eyes before the troll could look at him. No doubt this song came as a shock; it was a piece that Moomin had probably forgotten about. 

Snufkin had composed it about three years ago, with Moomin’s close influence. During that time Moomin and Snorkmaiden were having a nasty fight that was lasting for days, and it was one of the times Snufkin had felt worried that their string might break. So, when Moomin came to him, asking for help in composing a waltz to smooth things over, Snufkin agreed immediately. It took a few days, but it had worked, and Moomin and Snorkmaiden danced to it all night while Snufkin played. They were a picture-perfect couple that night. 

And at such a fancy ball, with the other musicians adding and embellishing the simple themes, the song sounded even better. If this didn’t bring them together, he didn’t know what would. He kept his eyes closed as he played, his heart beating nervously as he wondered if it worked. 

When he finally opened his eyes, expecting to see Moomin and Snorkmaiden clinging to each other and softly swaying, Moomin was nowhere to be found. Instead, his eyes locked onto Snorkmaiden, who was glaring at him with bright green fur as she stomped over towards the stage. 

“Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen,” she greeted without looking at the other musicians. “I need to borrow Snufkin here — I’m sure you won’t miss him for a few minutes.” 

Snufkin was pulled out of his chair before he could get a word in, barely managing to set his violin down in time. He was tugged to the far edge of the dance floor, the one closest to Moominhouse, before she grabbed his hands to start a simple two-step. 

“Why did you play that song?” Her cold eyes were making Snufkin’s hair stand on end, and her fury-filled voice made his stomach roll. 

“I don’t know what you mean.” 

_ “Stop.” _

Snufkin winced. Snorkmaiden could really sound like a scolding mother when she wanted to. 

“I might not be his girlfriend anymore,” Snorkmaiden’s tone was low and harsh, leaving no room for argument, “but that doesn’t mean I won’t help him if I can.” 

Snufkin swallowed, simply nodding in response. Her next words were like a stab to his heart. 

“You had to know it would hurt him.” Snorkmaiden’s teeth were clenched, her eyes glaring daggers into his skin. “The things you’re doing and saying — they’re all hurting him. For goodness’ sake, Snufkin, he says he misses you and wants to spend more time together and all you can say is ‘we’ll see what the cards have in store’? I thought you’d gotten over this standoffish attitude.” 

Snufkin opened his mouth to retort with something, anything, but nothing came out. There wasn’t an excuse simple or coherent enough to even try to start explaining. 

“Well?” she snapped. “You don’t have anything to say?” 

“I thought it would help,” Snufkin croaked out, his voice cracking on the last word. 

“Help what!?” Snorkmaiden demanded, her grip tightening on his hands. “What could  _ that _ song have possibly helped?” 

“Your relationship!” Snufkin accidentally yelled. Thankfully the music was loud enough that not too many people heard. “I’m trying to help you two —” 

Snorkmaiden interrupted him with a scoff and an eye roll. “Something really is wrong with you. Moomin and I are friends, and we’re happy that way. There’s nothing to help.” 

“Yes, there is.” Snufkin ducked his head down, staring at the dark red string around his finger as hot tears started to form in his eyes.  _ This is all your fault. _

“Look.” Snorkmaiden spoke more calmly then before, clearly done listening to him. “I don’t know what you think you’re doing, but if you care for him at all then you’ll go check on him. He’s in his room.” She practically threw his hands down before stomping off, leaving Snufkin standing awkwardly on the edge of the dance floor. 

He swallowed thickly, looking over at Moominhouse. A thin, dark red string was exiting out of Moomin’s window, pulling taut on Snufkin’s finger, not that he could really feel the pulling. All of the lights were off, which meant Moomin hadn’t even bothered to turn his own bedroom light on. Snufkin prayed he wasn’t crying in the dark. 

He hadn’t meant to hurt Moomin by playing that old song. He really thought it would just bring back some nice memories; he thought it would set things right again. But, if anything, it seemed like it pushed Moomin farther away from anyone. 

Snufkin took a deep breath and let it out completely before willing his feet to carry him towards Moominhouse. His aching heart was beating loud in his ears, and he was starting to feel so hot that he had to tug off his outer jacket just so he could breathe again. He would have just dropped it in the grass if he didn’t think Mrs. Fillyjonk would berate him afterwards, so instead he carried it over his arm, clutching it tight to his chest as he went through the bright red door and walked up the stairs. 

He stopped in front of Moomin’s door, for once feeling intimidated by the oak wood instead of excited. He took another breath to ease the tightness in his chest before knocking. “Moomin? Are you here?” 

Silence. And yet, Snufkin’s ears hurt from how loud it was. He jumped when he heard faint shuffling from behind the door, and he found himself holding his breath once the door opened. 

Snufkin only had his night-vision since it was so dark, but that was all he needed to see the dullness of Moomin’s normally bright, blue eyes. “Oh, hello.” Moomin’s voice had a purposeful emptiness to it that made Snufkin’s fur stand on end. “Don’t you have music to play?” 

“I…” Snufkin’s mouth was so dry that he had to stop talking just to swallow. “I’m on a break.” 

“Oh. That’s nice.” 

The two stared at each other, and Snufkin felt his knees start to shake. 

Moomin sighed softly, looking away as he mumbled, “Well, what do you want?” 

“I wanted to check on you,” Snufkin whispered. Not that he meant to be that quiet. “I’m sorry you didn’t like that last song.” 

Moomin’s teeth clenched, his head snapping forwards again to actually  _ glare _ at him. Snufkin couldn’t ever remember a time when Moomin looked at him like that before, and he really, really didn’t like it.  _ “Why _ would I like that song anymore, Snufkin? It’s not even that good, first of all, and second of all, it’s obvious you only started playing it because you saw Snorkmaiden and I talking.” 

Snufkin’s mouth was open, but no words found their way out. 

“I don’t understand you, lately.” Moomin’s glare lessened, replaced by a normal frown. “You said you were okay with Snorkmaiden and I breaking up. But you’re still… you’ve been trying to push us together all year, and now you’re  _ still _ doing it. Why? Do you think I don’t know my own heart? Don’t you trust me? You’ve never cared this much before! Sure, you help me out or give me relationship advice when I ask, but you’re never this... pushy!” 

“I know,” Snufkin whispered, clutching his suit jacket closer to his chest. “I’m sorry.” 

Moomin creased his eyebrows together, one hand reaching up by his head so he could grip the edge of the door. They stared at each other again, and Snufkin could tell that Moomin wanted him to keep talking. To explain himself, or to do  _ something, _ but he couldn’t. How could he possibly explain what had happened? How could he even begin to say that he’d taken Moomin away from his soulmate, and now was just trying to set things right again? He wished he knew what to say, what kind of defense to give himself, but he couldn’t speak. He was distracted by the sight of their strings turning three shades darker. 

“Do you remember what we did during summer last year?” Moomin whispered, his hand gripping the edge of the door so tightly that it creaked. “We went on a week-long journey to three nearby waterfalls. Just us two. Just us having fun, and talking, and actually acting like best friends. This year, we haven’t even spent a full day together.” 

Snufkin’s vision was starting to blur, and it felt like his chest was being crushed by a rock. 

“I tried not to think much of it. I tried to tell myself, ‘Of course Snufkin’s not avoiding you, don’t be silly. If he didn’t want to be around, he would have left by now.’ But the days wore on, and anytime I’d come find you we’d only talk for a few minutes before you’d get up and insist you needed to do something else. And at the same time, you kept suggesting I spend my time with Snorkmaiden instead. So, now, I…” Moomin stopped, giving time for tears to collect in his eyes before looking straight into Snufkin’s. “Now, I think I know why you’ve been pushing me and Snorkmaiden together. It’s the same reason you’ve been practically avoiding me all year, isn’t it? You want to leave Moominvalley for good, but you’d feel guilty leaving me ‘all alone,’ right? So you’re trying to make sure I latch onto someone else to ease your conscience.” 

Snufkin’s eyes widened in alarm. No, no! How could Moomin even think that? He didn’t want to leave Moominvalley forever, he’s not even sure if he could anymore. “No, Moomin, that’s not what I —” 

“Just stop.” Moomin closed his eyes tight, a few tears trailing down his snout as he turned away. “I can’t… I can’t believe your words right now. Your actions are far too loud for that.” 

Snufkin felt his whole body starting to shake, tears welling up behind his own eyes. He stepped forward to hug him, but Moomin stepped back. 

“You don’t need to worry about me.” Moomin sniffed, wiping at his eyes before forcing an empty smile on his face. “If you want to leave, I’m not stopping you. I have plenty of friends here, and I’ll always cherish the times we’ve had. Sorry if I was ever too needy or clingy, but you’re free to do what you like. You’re free from me.” 

“Moomin.” Snufkin’s voice was so quiet that he barely heard it himself. 

“Have a good night, Snufkin.” Moomin started to close the door, still unable to meet his eyes. “I’ll either see you again, or I won’t.” 

The door shut, and Snufkin sunk to his knees. His breaths came fast and shallow or not at all, while hot tears burned down his cheeks. He gripped tightly at the front of his shirt, pulling at it as if that would somehow relieve the boulder crushing his heart. He almost laughed at the sight of their red string thinning by three threads, their bow loosening for the first time since it tied them together. 

_ This is what you wanted, isn’t it? _ Their bond would break, and Moomin would be able to connect with Snorkmaiden again. Everything would be back to normal. Except it wouldn’t, because now Moomin thought that Snufkin didn’t even want to be around him anymore. 

_ This couldn’t be more wrong. _ Snufkin pressed his palms into his eyes, his teeth clenching so tight he wouldn’t be surprised if he chipped a tooth.  _ This is  _ not _ what I wanted! _

_ “But it’s what you have now.”  _

_ I can fix it, I— _

_ “Trying to ‘fix it’ is what got you here in the first place.”  _

_ I can’t just leave him like this! _

_ “You have to. He doesn’t believe you anymore, anyway.” _

Snufkin sucked in a breath, a sharp pain hitting his chest from the sudden deepness. That was it, wasn’t it? Even if he did stay now, Moomin wouldn’t believe that he actually wanted to be there. He’d think he was staying in Moominvalley to “ease his conscience.” So, he really didn’t have a choice. Maybe this was how things had to be; maybe this was the only way to give Moomin his happy ending back. To give him back the soulmate he’d been born with. 

It took three tries for Snufkin to push himself up onto his trembling legs, and he felt so dizzy that he almost fell down the stairs. But once his feet touched the grass, he ran all the way back to his tent to pack. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone enjoyed the angst :D   
> (I promise there will be a happy ending, it just takes time to get there).   
> Thank you to everyone that's been commenting so far! I really do enjoy seeing everyone's reactions to the story and the way I'm writing these characters, it makes me smile <3


	7. Secret Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin thinks about his past, and how he got to where he is today. Then he has a chat with an old friend to set him right again.

Snufkin had a fairly normal childhood for a half-mymble kit. He’d travelled through various lands with the Mymble (and his many,  _ many _ siblings) until he turned twelve, and was all too glad to strike out on his own after that. He loved his mother, he did, but being surrounded by dozens of rowdy children all at varying ages annoyed him even when he himself was a child. Besides, the sight of everyone else in his family having a soulmate while he was left with a lonely severed string made him feel hollow inside more often than he’d care to admit. And that feeling was made worse by the fact that he couldn’t even talk to anyone about it because they had no idea what he was saying. The only reason he knew what the Red String of Fate even meant was because his mother had heard about them years ago, not that she believed in them (despite having three strings herself). And the first time he’d ever seen another person with a severed string he’d been ten, and he couldn’t talk with them because the Mymble was in a “Go, Go, Go!” mood and they weren’t stopping unless it was time to sleep. 

Traveling alone, in comparison, felt like a dream come true. He could do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, however he wanted, with no one to tell him he was doing it wrong or demanding he do something else altogether. Now he was free to spend all day fishing in quiet, and he could learn as many instruments as he desired without his siblings getting their destructive, little hands on them. His anxieties melted away, and for the first time he felt like he could  _ think. _ He could think about who he was, what his values were, what it meant to even live in this world, and, of course, what the unattached string on his finger meant for him. 

By now, he’d seen enough of the world to realize that soulmates didn’t have to be romantic, and that just because soulmates existed didn’t mean people were always great at figuring out who theirs was. He couldn’t count how many times he’d seen a couple with strings desperately trying to pull them in different directions, especially in the cities where there were so many people it could make your head spin. He figured it was a combination of impatience mixed with a deep-seeded desire to not be alone; they’d rather have someone imperfect by their side than wait to meet their perfect match. But maybe that was too harsh; after all, it was still common for people to have a variety of friends and acquaintances throughout their life, instead of relying on only one person forever. Besides, even if someone wasn’t with whoever Fate had chosen for them, they could still be happy. Weren’t those with severed strings proof of that? 

That’s how he’d started to think about it. Because he  _ did  _ feel happy while he was travelling alone. The world was and is so big and beautiful, always having something new for him to see or experience. A simple bird call, the sun rising over mountains or setting over trees, the vast ocean waves lapping at sandy shores, the gentle butterflies fluttering amidst colorful flowers, puffy clouds that left their shape to the imagination — he loved them all. So, maybe he didn’t have a soulmate, so what? That just meant he was free to love everything around him without compromise. 

Being able to talk with others who had severed strings cemented that idea in his mind. The first one he’d actually met was a humble barber who said that he was glad not to partake in all that “couple nonsense.” The second was a fellow traveller like him, Susan, who said she used the gift of her “Soulmate Sight” to escort people to their true love (if they believed her, of course). Those were the only two he’d talked with before meeting Moomin, but he’d meet others during subsequent winter travels, like Moss. 

But, Moomintroll… he could perfectly remember the day he first met his soon-to-be best friend. Snufkin was young, almost fourteen, and was still trying to figure out how the world around him worked while acting like he already knew everything. It was a normal day for him; he’d set up his tent by a river, enjoying the sights of the distant mountains, the darker trees, and the local wildlife, and had sat in his tent to play his harmonica for awhile when he’d heard a shout. That’s when he saw him floating by on a little boat — a beautiful, snow white moomin with bright blue eyes who looked just a bit younger than him, accompanied by a clearly bored Sniff. 

He’d been excited to see some explorers, and a little less excited to learn of the possibility of a comet crashing down to destroy the beautiful earth. By this point he’d started to think of the entire world as his own soulmate, so of course he was interested in coming with them to find out more about this “star with a tail.” 

He didn’t expect to enjoy himself as thoroughly as he did, but he found himself greatly enjoying Moomin’s company. Admittedly, the way Moomin hung on his every word fueled his ego quite a bit, but he also found it rather adorable how expressive Moomin was. He was astounded by how Moomin showed no fear in putting his emotions on display for everyone to see, especially since that was something Snufkin had a hard time with. Not to mention how brave and kind Moomin was, especially for a twelve year old! Facing things like crocodiles and a deep waterfall just to find some information on a comet for his family. Not to mention fighting a poisonous bush to save a little female snork. 

Snufkin remembered that day clearly, too; when Moomin and Snorkmaiden met each other for the first time. He’d been amazed, since he’d never seen the moment a soulmate pair first meets, and the way the two interacted was so bashful and awkward that Snufkin couldn’t help but feel amused. He remembered what Susan had said, about being an escort for soulmates, and in that moment he thought that sounded like great fun. He could do the same thing with these two, help them get closer together and watch their relationship grow. Plus, that meant he could become better friends with Moomin, which Snufkin really liked the thought of. 

It seemed Moomin liked the idea of being his friend, too, because right before hibernation that year he was close to tears asking Snufkin if he’d return in the spring. Of course Snufkin agreed; he’d had a lot of fun in just the short amount of time he’d spent with Moomin, and he wanted to see the strength of soulmates’ love in action. 

So, every spring Snufkin returned to Moominvalley, and every year his fondness for Moomintroll and everyone else in the valley grew. No two years were the same; different adventures, different weather disasters, different lazy days. The only constant was the love everyone seemed to share for each other, and Snufkin was happy to be a part of it. Especially when it became painfully obvious that he’d somehow wound his way straight into Moomin’s heart, despite not being tied to him at all. 

The way Moomin always called his name with such excitement that his own heart leapt inside his chest, and the way everyone told him Moomin became depressed if he was late getting back to the valley, and the way Moomin seemed to want to spend most of his time with him — Snufkin didn’t understand how or why it all happened, but it made him feel a bewildering sort of happiness. 

Part of him didn’t like all the attention; it could feel very trapping to have someone think so highly of you, even if Moomin didn’t mean to make him feel that way. But a larger part of Snufkin felt… well,  _ smug. _ He’d spent so much of his childhood resenting and eventually accepting the fact that he wouldn’t have a “special someone,” but then Moomin and his friendship came along and it all felt very special to him. It was like he was laughing right in Fate’s face and telling them to piss off.  _ So what if you didn’t give me a soulmate? I found someone special anyway! _

By the time Snufkin was sixteen, he would sometimes daydream about him and Moomin being secret platonic soulmates, and one time he’d imagined his string attaching itself to Moomin’s right hand. He berated himself afterwards for being so silly; hadn’t he spent his life realizing that someone didn’t  _ need _ a Fate connection to be close? And yet here he was, still subconsciously hoping for it. 

Although, maybe such daydreams had more to do with the overwhelming crush he was developing for Moomin. 

Snufkin couldn’t pinpoint when his feelings turned from purely platonic to more romantic. He was just suddenly aware that it had become commonplace for them to hold hands whenever they walked alone, or for their hugs to last for a minute if not longer, or for Snufkin’s thoughts to inevitably drift to Moomin while he was playing his various instruments. He took note of how seeing Moomin smile or laugh was enough to lift his spirits, even if he’d been in a sour mood seconds before, and how Moomin’s company didn’t drain him at all. In fact, sometimes Moomin’s presence energized him, which was something he’d never experienced before. 

When he realized that his love for Moomin was growing well beyond the point of a simple friendship, he wasn’t sure how to feel. He knew his feelings couldn’t be reciprocated; Moomin already  _ had _ a romantic love, even if that relationship was sometimes rocky. But it wasn’t like Snufkin could stop himself from feeling this way, so he figured as long as he didn’t act on these new emotions then everything would be fine. As long as he knew nothing could change, why couldn’t he occasionally indulge in romantic fantasies? Most of these “fantasies” were things they already did together anyway, like cooking, playing music, telling stories, going on mini adventures, and just talking. The only purely indulgent thought he’d have is of them cuddling underneath the stars, and  _ maybe _ sharing a kiss, but that one was rare. 

Sometimes he felt selfish for his thoughts. After all, how could he claim to love the whole earth when he held Moomin so close to his heart? Other times he felt guilty, wondering if he was interfering too much with a soulmate pair. Especially since it seemed that most of Moomin and Snorkmaiden’s arguments had to do with just how much time he and Snufkin spent together. But certainly it would be fine; Moomin and Snorkmaiden were soulmates, so they couldn’t be broken apart, right? As long as Snufkin wasn’t outrightly taking Moomin away, then everything should work out. 

That was why this year, when he saw that Moomin’s string had snapped, he knew it had to be because of him. His fantasizing had gotten out of hand, or he must have done something to confuse Moomin, to make him give up on Snorkmaiden. His own selfishness had effectively ruined his best friend’s life, which is why he  _ needed _ to get them back together again. He’d made a mess, and he needed to clean it up. 

Who cared if a part of him rejoiced at seeing that little red bow connecting them? So what if Snufkin’s most immediate thought was  _ “Finally”? _ So what if all he’d wanted to do after that was tackle Moomin and kiss that precious snout? That didn’t matter. That life didn’t belong to him; he was meant to be alone. It was his selfishness that got him this far, but he’d be damned if he let his own desires get in the way of Moomin’s happiness. 

_ “But you’ve said it yourself that you don’t need a soulmate to be happy.”  _

_ I know, but… it’s Moomin.  _

_ “What makes Moomin different from others? He’s free to choose for himself, same as anyone.”  _

_ They wouldn’t have broken up if he’d never met me.  _

_ “You don’t know that.”  _

_ It’s an educated guess.  _

Snufkin’s thoughts died after that. His head was far too warm to be thinking, even with the autumn chill trying to cool him down. During the past couple months of aimless walking he’d barely eaten or slept, and now he didn’t even have the energy to pitch his tent. It was a clear night anyway; what did he need a shelter for? 

He stopped walking, dropping his pack carelessly beside a tree before plopping down onto the cool dirt. He stared up at the stars, vision blurring from the heat he still felt in his head, and all feelings leaving his fingers and toes. It had never felt so wrong to be traveling before, but it wasn’t like he had anywhere to go now. It was rather funny; he used to enjoy the fact that he had no home, but right now he’d give anything to be back in Moominvalley. He missed Moominmamma’s food, and Moominpappa’s stories, and Little My’s shouts, and Snorkmaiden’s dances, and Sniff’s schemes, and Mr. Hemulen’s plants, and even Mrs. Fillyjonk’s cleanliness. 

But most of all, he missed Moomintroll. He missed everything about him. 

“Snufkin?” 

For a second he swore he heard Moomin calling him. But, no, the voice he heard was a few notes too high to be Moomin. 

“Snufkin! Jeepers, it is you.” Rustling and clanging sounded through the night sky before a little head popped into Snufkin’s line of sight. “You look ill.” 

Snufkin only hummed in response, blinking his eyes a bit so he could take in who was in front of him. Light brown fur, ears that stretched high into the sky, a pink nose with zig-zag whiskers — it was Moss. 

“I got your letter.” Moss’s voice was much too quiet all of a sudden. Or Snufkin’s head was just too loud. “You weren’t kidding about your string. Hey, Snufkin? Stay with me, okay?” 

He must have ended up not listening, because the next thing Snufkin knew he was tucked into a wool bed inside a small log-cabin. 

He sat up quickly, his head pounding from the effort. It wasn’t nighttime anymore; the sun was peeking through the window, highlighting the bed, a little fire stove, an ice box, and a long desk filled with all sorts of papers and books. 

“Good morning.” Moss was busy stirring a pot of something on the stovetop, turning their head to frown at Snufkin. “You should lay down some more — I’m sure your fever’s not completely gone yet.” 

“Wha—” Snufkin croaked out before his voice died. He clutched at his throat, wincing from the ache that was residing there. He must not have been drinking enough. Or at all. 

“You look like you haven’t eaten in days.” Moss clucked their tongue at him, head shaking softly. “Are you really in that much disarray over having a soulmate?” 

Snufkin tensed, pulling his left hand out from underneath the covers so he could check on his string. His heart sunk when he saw it extending past the cabin walls, no thicker than two threads. It was so close to breaking, and even though that’s what he’d been trying to do, Snufkin couldn’t bring himself to think of it as a good thing at all. 

Moss sighed, ladling some soup into a bowl before walking over to Snufkin. “Eat this, then tell me what happened.” 

Snufkin would have declined the meal, if not for his stomach choosing that moment to let out a growl. He supposed one bowl couldn’t hurt. 

Three bowls and two glasses of water later, he felt okay enough to sit at the edge of the bed, Moss taking a seat next to him. 

“I ruined everything, Moss.” Snufkin’s voice cracked, but otherwise it came out strong. “I broke up a soulmate pair, and if that wasn’t bad enough, I connected to one of them.” 

“I know all that.” Moss leaned back on their hands. “That’s what your letter said, albeit more dramatically.” 

“Well, that’s everything.” Snufkin shrugged, setting the bowl down as tears began building in the backs of his eyes. 

“It can’t be everything.” Moss shook their head, gesturing to Snufkin’s dark red string. “ _ That _ doesn’t happen on its own.” 

“I didn’t mean to connect to him.” 

“I’m not talking about the connection itself, I’m talking about the state it’s in. Strings don’t look like that unless something really bad happened between you two.” 

Snufkin clenched his teeth, remembering the sorrowful shine in Moomin’s eyes as he told him he was free to leave. “I… I was just trying to set things right. I was trying to get his string back to where it was before.” 

Moss stared at him for a few seconds, their whiskers wiggling as their nose twitched. “You were pushing Moomin away, weren’t you.” 

Snufkin almost wanted to ask how they knew Moomin’s name. Then he remembered that pretty much everyone in the surrounding area knew that he returned to Moominvalley every year. “I was trying to push him in the right direction.” 

Moss sighed, their ears drooping. “And who decided what the ‘right direction’ was?” 

“Fate did,” Snufkin replied stubbornly, already knowing where Moss was going with this. 

“Okay, you’ve got me there. But, then it changed its mind, right?” 

“I don’t know.” Snufkin sighed, burying his face in his hands. “All I know is that Moomin and Snorkmaiden were connected, and then I came along and interrupted them.” 

“Hm. Were you there when their connection broke?” 

“No.” Snufkin shook his head. “It happened while I was away.” 

“Then how is any of this your fault?” 

“Because.” Snufkin paused, lowering his hands as he felt heat pool in his cheeks. “Because I was always there, distracting Moomin. Year after year, he’d try to make time for everyone to have fun with, but I’d always end up stealing him away for longer. It’s my fault because…” Snufkin looked away, whispering, “I kind of wanted to connect to him.” 

The wind whistling against the side of the house filled the cabin, but all Snufkin could focus on was the way his heart twisted and pounded inside his chest. 

“At least you can admit it.” Moss patted Snufkin’s shoulder gently, prompting him to look at their small smile. “But that still doesn’t mean it’s your fault. No one really knows what causes a string to break, so you have to study it on a case-by-case basis.” 

Snufkin shook his head, looking over at Moss’s messy desk. “You’ve really been trying to study them?” 

“You bet. Not sure if I’ve reached any conclusions yet, but I’ve met a lot of fascinating people.” Moss chuckled, crossing their arms over their chest. “You’re one of them. I mean, really, you get a soulmate and the first thing you do is try to break away from them? How does that make sense?” 

“I don’t deserve it,” Snufkin replied, clutching his hands together. The sight of his pathetic string made him feel nauseous, but he couldn’t look away. “I was happy with the way things were.” 

“Well, sure.” Moss held up their own hand, shaking it to let the little string dance around. “Choosing our own happiness, right? But you told me a minute ago that you kind of always wanted to get hitched to Moomin.” 

“I didn’t say  _ that.” _

“Oh, don’t go all embarrassed on me.” Moss chuckled again. “It’s good to know what you want. I know you know that.” 

“I suppose.” Snufkin looked up at them, frowning. “But if that want disrupts another person’s life, then it’s not worth pursuing.” 

“How do you know it disrupted Moomin’s life?” Moss tilted their head, letting one ear flop down. “Maybe he wants this, too. His original string did break, after all. And once you become severed, you get to choose someone else. Er, I think — jury’s still out. But the point is, I don’t think your two strings would have connected unless  _ both _ of you wanted them to.” 

Snufkin clenched his teeth. He wanted to believe that, he really, really did. “I just can’t accept it. I know what you’re trying to say — Moomin can make his own choices, and even if he  _ was _ still connected to Snorkmaiden but wanted to choose me, he’d be free to do so. Or if he wanted both of us, I’d be fine with that; I’ve  _ been _ fine with that. But to be with only me… I’d always wonder if I was taking him away from something that would make him even happier, just because I’m being selfish. I mean, he already cries whenever I leave for winter, and now he even thinks I…” A tear fell on Snufkin’s hand, so he closed his eyes. “Now he thinks I don’t want to see him at all.” He could picture it again. Those blue eyes staring right through him as that usually warm, baritone voice coldly told him  _ “Don’t worry about me.” _

He really had ruined everything, hadn’t he? 

“Then why don’t you go back and clear it all up?” 

“What?” Snufkin sniffled, wiping at his eyes before looking up to frown at Moss. “I can’t—” 

“Yes, you can.” Moss’s soft, brown eyes acted as a source of comfort the longer Snufkin stared at them. “You said it yourself. He cries whenever you leave for winter, so how must he be feeling now? You talk about wanting him to be happy, but right now I think you’re just hurting him worse.” 

Snufkin’s fingers clutched tightly at tunic, his heart shrinking painfully in his chest. 

“But I think you can still mend your relationship,” Moss continued. “You don’t have to mention the strings, or why you were acting weird, just say you’re sorry. For goodness’ sakes, Snufkin, if what you really want is for things to go back to the way they were, then you need to at least act like a friend again.” Moss took a breath, smiling when they saw Snufkin’s eyes widen in realization. “We may not know everything about the strings, but we do know that people are  _ terrible _ at figuring out who they should be with. Even if you are connected to Moomin now, that doesn’t mean your relationship has to change. A few years down the line, things could be exactly like before, except now these pesky strings just happen to be tied to different people.” 

All Snufkin could do was blink as he thought that over. It seemed… so simple. Why hadn’t he thought of that before? Was he really just that shocked by the sight of their little red bow? Or by the sight of it growing brighter? He really thought he was smarter than that, yet he’d focused so heavily on his own guilt that he ignored the obvious. All this time he thought he had to put everything back to normal, when he could have just let life run its course. 

Snufkin never had to break their connection at all. They could still be friends, and Moomin could still be happy. And like Moss said, even if they were connected now, that didn’t necessarily mean that Moomin wouldn’t end up with Snorkmaiden in the long run. And at the same time, if Moomin did decide to pursue something different, with him… Ah, he shouldn’t get his hopes up; all that mattered to Snufkin was Moomin being happy, no matter how he felt. 

Shame began to settle hard in his stomach. He’d gone about this all wrong and ended up hurting his best friend in the process. And Snorkmaiden, too, he hadn’t even thought about her or what she wanted; some friend he was. He’d been arrogant, just assuming he knew better and acting without considering how others might be interpreting his actions. And, apparently, Moomin had read him in the worst possible way, not that he could really blame him. What is someone supposed to think when their best friend stops spending time with them? 

“I’ve really been a fool,” Snufkin muttered. 

“Don’t feel so bad.” Moss patted Snufkin on the back. “Love does strange things to a person.” 

Snufkin felt his face burn again. “I suppose you’re right.” He hopped off the bed, taking a deep breath as he looked around for his backpack. “Thank you, Moss. I should go now — feel free to come by the valley anytime.” 

“Maybe I’ll pop by next summer.” Moss stood up, padding over to the front door, where Snufkin’s pack lay beside. “I’m really curious to see how your string will change.” 

Snufkin laughed shortly, holding his hand up and grimacing at the thin, dark strands. How could he ever think  _ this _ was a good thing? Honestly, he felt like an idiot. “I promise you I will never,  _ ever _ let it look like this again.” 

Moss chuckled, shaking his head fondly. “Glad to hear it.” 

Snufkin sighed and picked up his pack, giving Moss one more smile before he was on his way. 

He wasn’t exactly sure how he’d make it up to Moomin, or how he’d explain himself, but he needed to try. If Moomin felt even half as bad as he did, then it was too much for his big, tender heart to bear. 

Besides, they still had the autumn to enjoy together. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To make this clear: Moss is supposed to resemble a bunny, because they are my favorite animals so why not make a bunny OC for the Moomins, y'know? XD
> 
> Next chapter, Snufkin and Moomin will reunite~ The angst is pretty much over, now we've just got to get through Snufkin handling his emotions/thoughts! 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who's been enjoying and commenting on the story; reading everyone's thoughts really makes me smile <3


	8. A Little Explanation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin returns to Moominvalley and talks with his best friend.

The journey from Moss’s cabin to Moominvalley lasted a week and a half. It would have taken a few days longer, but Snufkin was feeling anxious and impatient, so he’d spent more time walking in a day than he normally would. Unfortunately that meant he had less time to figure out what to say, but he was sure he’d figure it out. He and Moomin were still connected after all, so that made him feel hopeful. 

Unfortunately, hope didn’t stop his heart from leaping into his throat when he saw Moominhouse appear on the horizon. His hands turned clammy, and he almost tripped over a fallen log. This was it, soon he’d have to face everyone and apologize, and give some kind of explanation for his behavior. But it would have to wait till morning; it was late at night, and he didn’t think it appropriate to wake everyone up just so he could say a few words. He’d just walk a bit further and set up his tent somewhere in the forest; he didn’t want anyone to see him before he was ready, after all. 

Which is why he quickly ducked behind some bushes when he heard a familiar voice a few paces in front of him. 

“We should really go to bed, Moomintroll.” 

“I know, I know, Snorkmaiden, just let me walk a little more.” 

“You’ve been busy  _ all day _ , you need your rest! You can’t be out here all night, too.” 

“I feel fine, I know what I can handle.”

“That’s what you always say!” 

“And it’s true!” 

Snorkmaiden sighed, shaking her head. “Just face it. He’s not coming back.” 

Snufkin swallowed, his heart slowly sinking. He tried not to be conceited, but he had a suspicion they were talking about him. 

“You don’t know that,” Moomin replied quietly. 

“Moomin —” 

“Don’t ‘Moomin’ me!” He snapped. “If you don’t want to walk with me, you don’t have to.” 

“What, and let you come back with dried tears and a sprained ankle?” 

“I can handle myself, I don’t need a  _ babysitter—”  _

“We’re not babying you, Moomintroll, we’re just worried.” 

“Well  _ don’t _ be.” 

The two stopped in front of the bush Snufkin was hiding behind, allowing him to see the dark color of Snorkmaiden’s fur, though he couldn’t make out the exact shade. He was more focused on the pained look on Moomin’s face, and the way his heart wanted him to immediately run over and hug him, while his stomach sank into his shoes to keep him in place. 

“We’re your friends, Moomintroll,” Snorkmaiden reminded him, stepping closer to take his hands in hers. “I’m your friend. And I’m telling you to save your heart. You said it yourself: you’ll either see him again, or you won’t. So just… let him go.” 

Tears pooled in Moomin’s eyes immediately. He shook his head, pulling his hands away before walking forwards again. “I’ll go to bed in a few minutes.” 

Snorkmaiden gave a frustrated sigh and followed after him, her fur turning even darker. “Right. Sorry, forgot about how you’re physically incapable of  _ not _ thinking about him for even a  _ second.” _

Moomin simply sighed, his shoulders slumping down as he hung his head. “I already promised I’d give up if he didn’t return next year.” 

Snufkin almost gasped, the pain in his chest was so sharp. He covered his mouth, trying to stop himself from making any sound as his body went cold. 

“So, can you just.” Moomin clenched his fists, stomping forward again. “Just let me be for now.” 

“You’re such a fool, Moomintroll!” Snorkmaiden yelled after him. But it seemed she’d had enough as she stomped away from him, groaning her angry displeasure at the night sky. 

Snufkin stayed hidden, trying to control his breathing and the hollow feeling in his chest. The familiar feeling of unshed tears burned behind his eyes, and his legs were starting to tingle with the beginnings of numbness. Hearing Moomin even consider giving up on him… no. No, he couldn’t have that. He just couldn’t! 

He burst out of the brush, running towards Moomin as fast as his feet would carry him. He still didn’t have a plan, but when Moomin turned around to see who was making so much noise, Snufkin didn’t hesitate to tackle him in a hug, sinking his fingers into that warm, familiar fur, and burying his face into his broad chest. 

“Wha—!” Moomin almost fell backwards from the force of it, his arms automatically coming forward to hug him back. “Sn-Snufkin??” 

“I’m sorry,” Snufkin whispered. He realized Moomin probably hadn’t heard him, so he lifted his head and repeated himself, not caring that Moomin could see the tears in his eyes. “I’m sorry.” 

Moomin’s eyes widened, searching Snufkin’s face in alarm. “You’re… crying?” 

Snufkin nodded, hot tears falling down his cheeks as he laughed softly. He buried his face into Moomin’s fur again before mumbling, “I missed you.” 

“You…” Moomin’s grip tightened around Snufkin, a few seconds passing before he let his snout rest on top of Snufkin’s hat and head. “Never mind. I don’t care if this is a dream.” 

Snufkin laughed again, because if he didn’t he’d just cry harder. “It’s not a dream. I’m here, and I want to be here — I didn’t even want to leave, but it felt like I had no choice. Which wasn’t true, I realize that now, so I came back.” 

“You’re talking in circles a bit,” Moomin muttered, slipping his warm hands between Snufkin and his backpack for a better hold on him. “But I hear you. It’s okay.” 

“No, it’s not.” Snufkin gently pressed his head up into Moomin’s snout so he’d lift it, and they could look into each other’s eyes. “I really hurt you, and I’m sorry. I don’t have a good excuse that makes any sense, but I promise I won’t be acting like, like a stranger anymore.” 

Moomin’s ears twitched, his arms tensing up just a little. His eyes roamed across Snufkin’s face again, his mouth in a tight line as if fighting with himself on whether or not to believe him. He took a long, slow breath, his voice hesitant as he whispered, “You really, truly mean it?” 

Snufkin nodded quickly, taking one hand away to wipe at his eyes. “I do. I really, truly do.” He lowered his hand back to Moomin’s shoulder, and he took a moment to enjoy the feeling of Moomin’s big arms pressing into his back, keeping him close. He didn’t know how Moomin could make hugs feel comforting instead of claustrophobic, but he was grateful. 

“I still have so many questions,” Moomin whispered, pressing his snout to Snufkin’s forehead. 

“I can try to answer some.” 

Moomin didn’t speak for a few seconds, and when he did it sounded like he was trying not to cry. “You really can’t tell me what that was all about? Why we weren’t spending any time together? I kept wracking my brain, trying to see if I’d done anything—” 

“It wasn’t your fault at all,” Snufkin interrupted, squeezing Moomin once. “I was…” He still didn’t have any words to explain himself. “I was handling some new ideas very poorly.” 

“New ideas?” Moomin pulled back a little so he could frown at him, and Snufkin could see his tears glistening in the starlight. “Ideas about what?” 

Snufkin glanced away, his fingers curling against white fur. “Long story short, I’d gotten it in my head that you needed to be with Snorkmaiden to be happy.” 

“What?” Moomin creased his brows together, lifting a hand to wipe at his eyes.  _ “Why?” _

“I don’t know.” Snufkin sighed, closing his eyes. “But I should have listened to you. I should have believed you.” 

“Yes, you should have,” Moomin agreed. “Honestly, Snufkin! I thought I was supposed to be the one with stupid ideas in my head.” 

Snufkin laughed again, letting his head fall forward so he could rest it against Moomin once more. “I know. I won’t live this down anytime soon, I expect.” 

“Definitely not.” Moomin squeezed him gently. “But… I still don’t get what that has to do with you avoiding me.”

Snufkin felt warmth pool in his face, and not just because he was gladly soaking up Moomin’s body heat. How could he say this without confessing? “I didn’t want to get in the way. Or distract you.” 

Moomin snorted, plucking Snufkin’s hat off his head so he could nuzzle the top of his hair with his snout, inadvertently sending shivers down his spine. “Snufkin, I’m certain that by now this is no big secret, but I will always be distracted by you.” 

Snufkin’s grip tightened, his heart skipping a few beats in his chest. God, did Moomin have any idea how romantic that sounded? Did he have any idea how Snufkin’s knees were close to buckling? He was making it so  _ very _ hard for Snufkin to want to stay just friends. 

“Too much?” Moomin muttered. 

“No,” Snufkin whispered, shaking his head gently against Moomin. “You’re never too much. And I don’t think you’re needy, or clingy — at least not so much that it’s overbearing.” 

“Oh.” Moomin exhaled sharply in place of laughing. “Well, good to know you’ve been thinking about that night, too.” 

“It was the last time we’d seen each other, after all.” Snufkin gently pulled away to look into Moomin’s wide eyes again, his head feeling chilly from the absence of his hat and Moomin’s snout. “I know I’ve already said it, but I’m sorry. I’m so sorry that I ever made you think I’d want to leave you for good, because it’s quite the opposite.” 

Moomin’s fur bristled slightly, his ears standing at attention, and Snufkin was sure his tail would be flicking about if he could see it. “If you keep saying things like that, I’ll have no choice but to forgive you.” 

Snufkin felt the corner of his mouth turn up into a grin. “So I’m not forgiven already?” 

“Mm, not yet. I’ll need at least seven more heartfelt apologies before winter.” 

Snufkin gave a loud laugh, shaking his head softly. “Why seven?” 

“Because it’s such a nice number, don’t you think?” Moomin seemed to be struggling not to smile, and was losing terribly. “Really rolls off the tongue.” 

Snufkin was laughing so much that he snorted once, covering his mouth right after to hide his shy smile. “Excuse me.” 

Moomin smiled brightly, placing Snufkin’s hat on his own head as he chuckled. “Nothing to excuse. I love seeing you relaxed like this.” He helped Snufkin slip his backpack off so he could put it over his own fuzzy shoulders. “Now, as a continuation of your apology, why don’t we have an impromptu camping trip? We have lots to catch up on, although it’d probably be better if I just showed you what we’ve all been up to tomorrow. Oh, you know what I’d really love?” Moomin started walking further towards Moominhouse, obviously expecting Snufkin to follow. “A rousing song on your accordion! You haven’t played that one in awhile, which is a shame because you play it so beautifully.” 

Snufkin stayed put for a moment, simply smiling as Moomin walked off and continued rambling about the accordion tunes he could remember. He thought Moomin looked rather good wearing his hat and backpack, and the fact that he’d really only let Moomin take those things from him (and that Moomin knew he had this privilege) was right at the forefront of his mind. His heart was quick and steady like a drum’s, his eyes drawn to the sight of the little red bow still connecting their strings. He’d never felt so glad to see it back to its normal thickness, though it was still a little dull. Seemed Moomin really did want those seven apologies, not that Snufkin could blame him. He’d be glad to make it up to him, and even more thrilled to see their string glow bright again. 

Really, why had he ever thought that he needed to break their connection? Snufkin sighed, shaking his head at himself. He broke into a jog to catch up with Moomin, reaching for his left hand and squeezing it once. He smiled wider when Moomin turned to look at him, promising, “I’ll play all your favorites until you fall asleep.” 

“Fall asleep?” Moomin chuckled, tipping Snufkin’s hat down further over his eyes. “And what makes you think I’ll fall asleep anytime soon?” 

“Hm. Years of knowing you?” 

“... All right, you’ve got me there.” 

“Of course I do. Can I have my hat back now?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *singing* Reunited and it feels so good~ 
> 
> The angst may be over, but that doesn't mean Snufkin is ready to fully accept /all/ of his feelings (even if Moomin is... so painfully obvious). Sorry this one's a bit shorter again, but it was a good place to cut off! 
> 
> Thank you again for all of your wonderful comments!! I'm always glad when people enjoy reading something as much as I enjoyed writing it <3


	9. Catching Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin learns what Moominvalley has been up to since he left. And he realizes that one person is very upset with him.

Moomin hadn’t been kidding about having lots to catch up on. Apparently, immediately after the fancy ball had taken place, Sniff was approached by a party guest and received an endorsement to open up the restaurant he’d been talking about all year. In Sniff fashion, he couldn’t believe it and had fainted, but luckily Little My was there and had settled negotiations with the man for him. 

A week later, Moomin had offered to build the establishment for him, which Snufkin was slightly surprised to hear. From the talk he’d overheard between Moomin and Snorkmaiden, he really thought Moomin had been a wreck when he left. 

Moomin called him out immediately for his reaction. “What, did you think I spent the entire summer pining for you in my room?” 

“No, no, of course not,” Snufkin lied. 

Moomin crossed his arms, staring at him for a moment before sighing and glancing away. “I spent every night pining instead, okay? But I needed something to distract me during the day.” 

Building a restaurant proved to be a wonderful distraction indeed. Snufkin was genuinely impressed by the tall, one-story structure when Moomin took him to see it at sunrise the next morning. The location was sublime; a little forest clearing close to the beach, so that anyone that was spending a day swimming or seashell hunting would be more likely to come over to eat. Plus, it left the opportunity for sailors and other adventurers to find it easily. And for just a few months, Moomin already had the entire framework built with doors and windows put in, only needing to further insulate the walls and apply shingles to the roof. 

“You did all this yourself?” Snufkin asked, in awe as he felt the smooth, wooden walls with his fingertips. 

“Yeah, for the most part.” Moomin rubbed at the back of his neck, staring up at the building with a weak smile. “Pappa helped with some of it, but, um… like I said, this was my distraction. Mamma had to remind me to eat most days, and Snorkmaiden tried to remind me to sleep. Little My just teased me, of course.” 

Snufkin felt his heart lurch in his chest. He wasn’t sure how to feel about causing Moomin such distress, but he definitely didn’t feel good about it. He swallowed, placing both hands against the building to ground himself. “And Sniff?” 

“He wouldn’t stop talking about ideas for his restaurant. I can’t tell you how many themes he’s gone through — a pirate’s bar, a spaceship, a zen garden, a jungle, a colosseum, a diner; you name it!” 

“What has he settled on?” 

Moomin snorted before laughing briefly. “Snorkmaiden talked him into something called ‘Moominvalley chic.’ I don’t think he even knows what that means, but it sounded fancy so he went with it. Mamma’s been helping him with the menu when she wasn’t fretting over me. I’m just hoping to finish the roof before winter comes, you know?” 

Snufkin curled his fingers against the wall. “I could help, if you’d like.” 

Moomin was silent, his next words coming out slow and quiet. “I’ll have to think about it. It’d feel weird to have you help me out with it now, but I do want to spend time with you, so…” 

“I understand.” Snufkin turned around, pressing his back against the wood instead as he smiled calmly. “I could play music for you while you worked, if that sounds better.” 

Moomin’s ears twitched, his eyes looking Snufkin up and down once before he walked over. Snufkin couldn’t breathe when Moomin placed his hands on his shoulders, his soft belly pressing against Snufkin’s front while the tip of his snout rested against Snufkin’s forehead, effectively pinning him against the building. “That does sound nice,” Moomin whispered, his warm breath making Snufkin feel dizzy. “Thank you.” 

Snufkin swallowed, lifting his hands up to lightly press against Moomin’s chest. His heartbeat was so loud in his ears that he could barely hear himself as he whispered back, “You’re welcome.” 

They stayed just like that for a few moments, Snufkin closing his eyes in a vain attempt at controlling himself. His thoughts were running far too wild the longer they stayed in this position, but he didn’t quite have it in himself to break away. 

His breath hitched when Moomin nuzzled his head and stood up straight immediately after. “Come on,” he whispered, smiling once Snufkin opened his eyes. “Let’s head back. I’m sure everyone else will want to see you, too.” 

* * *

Moomin was mostly right. Moominpappa greeted Snufkin loudly once he entered the house, coming over to pat him hard on the back and exclaim, “Good to see you again, Snufkin! The valley isn’t the same without you.” 

Moominmamma nodded in agreement, folding her hands together. “Yes, we missed you terribly, dear. I couldn’t quite believe it when Moomin told us why you’d left.” 

Little My had only been glaring at him as soon as he entered, but now she ran up and kicked him once in the shin. “If I’d known you were gonna be so stupid I would have never helped you plan that stupid ball!” 

Snufkin smiled weakly down at her, shaking his leg out a bit. “Sorry, Little My. Won’t happen again, I promise.” 

“Is Snorkmaiden awake?” Moomin asked, pulling at his fingers as he looked to the stairs. 

“Not yet, dear.” Moominmamma frowned, tilting her head a bit to give her son a look. “She stayed up quite late waiting for you to come back.” 

“Oh.” Moomin winced, his ears flattening. “I’ll go wake her up, then.” 

Snufkin watched out of the corner of his eye as Moomin headed upstairs, his heart skipping a beat at the thought of seeing Snorkmaiden. He had a feeling that she wouldn’t be quite so thrilled that he was back in the valley. 

“Why don’t you sit down, Snufkin?” Mamma suggested, heading back to the kitchen. “I’ll make you a cup of coffee.” 

“Thank you, Mamma.” Snufkin tipped his hat before sitting down on the living room couch, Little My quickly clamoring up to sit next to him. 

“I  _ can’t _ believe you ran away!” she exclaimed as Moominpappa moved to sit in his chair. “I thought the ball being a failure would help you treat Moomin and Snorkmaiden normally again.” 

“Ah, so  _ that _ was your game.” Snufkin chuckled, patting her bun with a tense smile. “Don’t worry, I’ve been regretting that night plenty already.” 

Little My pushed at his hand, huffing. “Plus I was hoping to get you to dance with Moomin once most of the guests had left, since I know he’d have wanted to.” 

Snufkin kept his smile up as he rested his head in his hand and ignored her implications. “Oh? Well, that would have been a better end to the night for sure.” 

“You really think so?” She asked, narrowing her eyes at him. “So you  _ don’t _ think Moomin and Snorkmaiden are soulmates anymore?” 

“Maybe we shouldn’t talk so loud, please?” 

“Soulmates?” Moominpappa sat up a bit, blinking at the two of them. “What’s this talk now?” 

Snufkin ground his teeth, still smiling. “Nothing, Pappa —” 

“Mamma used to talk about soulmates when we were younger.” Moominpappa chuckled, settling back in his chair with a pleased smile on his face. “It’s a nice thought, isn’t it? That someone out there is perfect for you.” 

“You believe in soulmates, Moominpappa?” Little My was not impressed, rolling her eyes. “I shouldn’t be surprised.” 

“Well, sure I believe!” Moominpappa huffed, giving Little My a pointed look. “With how magical the world is, how could I not? Oh, I don’t know if I believe in all of it, though — I just think people choose someone to think of as their soulmate. It’s a way to express how much they mean to you!” He stood up suddenly, quickly heading to the kitchen. “Speaking of, I feel like being with my soulmate right now.” He passed behind them on the couch, chuckling when Little My pretended to gag. 

“What’s with you people.” Little My shook her head, crossing her arms and slumping on the couch. “All your ‘romantic’ thoughts. There’s more to life!” 

Snufkin couldn’t help but chuckle a little, relieved that the conversation was off him now. “Soulmates can be platonic, too, you know.” 

“So you  _ do _ believe in them?” 

“Perhaps. The way Pappa put it certainly sounds nice, doesn’t it?” 

Little My scoffed again, her next words making Snufkin’s heart skip a few beats. “If soulmates did exist, then you and Moomin would be it.” 

A loud thud came from the ceiling then, drawing their attention upwards. A creaky door swung open, and they could hear Moomin and Snorkmaiden talking in hushed tones. 

“Snorkmaiden, please be nice —” 

_ “Nice? _ Was he being ‘nice’ when he took off without a word?” 

“It was just  _ one _ argument!” 

“An argument implies a conversation, Moomintroll.” 

“Not an argument then, one… lapse in judgment!” 

Snorkmaiden groaned loudly, her tone turning just a bit quieter, but not quiet enough. “I  _ hate _ how much you let him get away with.” 

“I’m not letting him ‘get away’ with anything!” Heavy footsteps were heard coming down the stairs. “Look, just… hear him out?” 

_ “Fine.” _

Snufkin exchanged glances with Little My, who was already hopping off of the couch. “Something tells me I should go. Good luck with her!” She ran off, quick to head out the front door and close it quietly behind her for once. 

Snufkin swallowed when Snorkmaiden made it down the stairs first, and took notice of the greenish-gray coloring of her fur. That couldn’t be anything good. He offered what he hoped looked like a normal smile and a small wave. “Hello.” 

Snorkmaiden only narrowed her eyes at him, her fur now cycling through varying shades of green. All of which meant she was very upset with different secondary emotions. Oh, dear. 

“Isn’t it nice to see him?” Moomin tried to mediate, his hands clasped tightly together and his ears pinned back. “He’s promised to not act like a stranger anymore!” 

Snorkmaiden rolled her eyes. “How charming.” 

“Coffee’s ready!” Moominmamma returned with a metal tray holding several cups of coffee, all at varying levels of darkness. “They’re just the way everyone likes them. And Snorkmaiden, I have some pancakes for you to eat when you’re ready.” 

“Thank you, Mamma.” Snorkmaiden took a breath, her fur stabilizing at a bright green as she exhaled and took a cup. 

“Thanks, Mamma.” Moomin took his coffee next, quietly asking, “Are there enough pancakes for me, too?” 

“Of course, dear.” She walked towards Snufkin so he could take the darkest cup from her tray. “Even though you were out all night I still hoped you’d join us for breakfast.” 

Moomin’s ear twitched before he sighed. “I didn’t mean to worry you.” 

“I’m your mother, Moomintroll,” she reminded him gently, tucking her tray under her arm. “Moominpappa and I will enjoy our cups on the back porch, if you need us.” 

“Thanks.” Moomin stepped forward as his mother passed so he could grip her arm and nuzzle her cheek briefly. “And sorry.” 

Moominmamma smiled warmly, nuzzling back with her eyes closed. “Thank you, dear. Enjoy your day now, everyone.” She gave them all a pleasant smile before taking her leave. Snufkin wished he could go with her. 

“So!” Moomin clapped his hands, looking back to Snorkmaiden. “Why don’t you take a seat next to Snufkin? Catch up a bit?” 

Snorkmaiden only gave Moomin a look before stepping towards a single armchair instead, sipping her coffee loudly to discourage conversation, which Snufkin was all too happy to comply with. 

Moomin’s ears fell again, but then he turned to Snufkin with those wide, hopeful blue eyes, and Snufkin internally sighed. 

“Snorkmaiden,” he started, keeping a smile on his face even as she glared at him. “Perhaps you and I could go for a walk by the beach after breakfast?” 

“That sounds like a great idea!” Moomin chirped, his tail wagging as he turned back to Snorkmaiden. “You could even go for a swim while the water’s still not too cold!” 

“Neither of you are subtle,” Snorkmaiden mumbled into her drink. 

“Well, neither are you with that fur color,” Moomin argued, crossing his arms now. “Is it so wrong of me to want my friends to get along?” 

“Of course not.” Snorkmaiden sighed again, closing her eyes. “A walk after breakfast sounds lovely.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, this chapter and the next one were combined, but then the next part became so long it just made sense to separate them. That being said, I'll probably end up posting the next chapter tomorrow to make up for it slightly XD 
> 
> We're moving along, people!! It is with great excitement that I can tell you all to prepare yourselves for chapter 13 now, but this time in the best way possible. ;)


	10. A Small Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin and Snorkmaiden have an important talk regarding Moomin and relationships.

The walk to the beach felt like an eternity because of how silent it was. Snorkmaiden clearly had no intention of starting a conversation yet, and Snufkin could barely focus with how quick his heart was beating and how the edges of his vision blurred. He’d been so focused on Moomin this year that he wasn’t even sure what Snorkmaiden would be thinking of him, or why exactly she was mad. He could guess, of course, but he’d rather not assume things. 

Once they finally stepped onto the light sand, she took a deep breath and turned to him, fur still green. “You know, I was really,  _ really _ hoping that Moomin would chew you out a bit if you came back. But, of course, he just lets you act like nothing happened at all.” 

Snufkin’s entire body felt tense. “He didn’t… we talked last night.” 

“And what excuses did you give him?” 

Snufkin sighed, tugging his hat further down his head as he frowned. Excuses? He supposed you could call them that, but he was sincere when he’d answered Moomin’s questions. He tried explaining his behavior to the best of his ability, and Moomin listened. That’s all. “Moomin hasn’t completely forgiven me.” He lowered his hands back to his sides, looking up to meet her eyes. “He wants me to apologize seven more times.” 

Snorkmaiden raised a brow at that. “Is that genuine or one of your little inside jokes?” 

“... Both?” Snufkin smiled weakly. “I think it just means I need to make it up to him.” 

“Hm.” Snorkmaiden tapped her foot on the ground. “Good for him I suppose. That still doesn’t excuse you in my book. I mean, I know we aren’t the closest of friends, but he’s not the only one you left without saying a word to.” 

“I know.” Snufkin swallowed, turning his head away. “I’m sorry.” 

“Little My was broken up about it, not that she’d outrightly admit it. She thought she’d played a part in pushing you away from the valley, since she helped you plan that stupid ball.” She stopped, taking another breath before continuing in a quieter tone, “And then I started to feel guilty for pushing you to talk to him that night. Maybe if you two had talked in the morning we wouldn’t have had all this drama. I just thought you’d, you know, reassure him. Not  _ run away.” _

“I didn’t intend to.” Snufkin sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose briefly. “He assumed I didn’t… No, it’s not his fault. My actions made him think awful things about me, and now I need to show him just how sorry I am. I know that.” He lowered his hand again, looking up at her with a frown. “I am sorry, to him and to you — to everyone, even. I need you to know that I’d never hurt him on purpose, I just thought I was doing the right thing.” 

Snorkmaiden stared at him, crossing her arms over her darkened fur before taking a breath. “Look. If you want me to forgive you, then I need you to be 100% honest with me.” She turned her head slightly to the side. “Otherwise there’s no point, and I’ll just leave. Understand?” 

Snufkin only nodded, his hands folding behind his back. 

“Good.” Snorkmaiden nodded once. “Because whatever you told Moomin might have been good enough for him, but I have a feeling you didn’t give the whole story.” 

Snufkin swallowed, a smile automatically coming to his face as he replied, “Well, that depends what you —” 

“Wipe that damn smile off your face.” Snorkmaiden rolled her eyes in disgust before walking over to some nearby rocks. She sat down, turning to him with a glare. “I told you I want honesty, so stop with that happy, little façade you put on to avoid engaging with people.” 

Snufkin felt his stomach twist. He knew Snorkmaiden was perceptive and currently pissed off, but you don’t just call out a man’s coping mechanism like that. Nonetheless, he walked over and took a seat next to her, both of them watching the sea’s waves lazily lap at the shore before receding back into untold depths. “You’re right,” he whispered eventually, staring down at his shoes. “I didn’t give him the full story.” 

“Thank you.” Her fur finally began lessening in color. “What did you tell him, then?” 

Snufkin took a deep breath in through his nose, letting it out slowly as the sea’s winds jostled his hat. “I told him I was sorry, because I am. I didn’t… I would never want to leave for good, but I know I’ll have to convince him of that still.” He looked away, forcing himself to talk loud enough to be heard. “I told him why I was acting so strange. Because I’d gotten it in my head that you two needed to be together in order to be happy.” 

“What??” Her voice cracked, but Snufkin wasn’t sure if it was from pure shock or slight outrage. “Why would you —! Ugh, he told me you’d been expecting us to get married, but I didn’t think your delusions ran  _ that _ deep.” 

“It’s not a delusion.” Snufkin turned to her, frowning. “You two have been together most of your lives; it’s a classic romance.” 

“Maybe in a story.” Snorkmaiden shook her head, staring out at the water as her fur took a gray tinge to it. “Maybe if we’d stayed the same our whole lives, but… we’re both  _ different _ now, Snufkin. We changed, but our relationship didn’t change with us. Being with someone for most of your life, like you say, it’s more tricky than people think.” Snorkmaiden leaned forward, resting her head in her hands. “It’s precisely because you have so much history together that it almost feels like you shouldn’t change, even if you want to. That you should stay exactly how the other person remembers you, because that’s how the relationship began. And since we’ve been dating since we were kids, it feels even worse.” She closed her eyes, sighing softly. “Maybe if we expected or even encouraged each other to change from the start, it might have been better. But that’s not how we practiced our relationship at all; we just kept chasing an unrealistic ideal. Now, as friends, I think we encourage each other much better. I feel like we actually see each other for who we are.” 

Snufkin could only stare at her, his eyes wide as he took that in. She sounded so  _ certain _ about this, just like Moomin had when he talked about breaking up. There was a tinge of melancholy of course, but no regret. Honestly, she mainly seemed hopeful, with a readiness to move on that he wasn’t sure how to take. His eyes drifted to her shining, red string, still trying to pull her south. Or maybe it was pulling her new soulmate north. 

“I wish we would have started out as friends,” Snorkmaiden continued, straightening up a bit. “Instead of forcing a romance from the start. I do wish we’d found a way to make it work. I think we  _ could _ have been happy together, but with things the way they are now, I also think we can be just as happy if not happier like this.” She turned to look at Snufkin, staring straight into his eyes. “So I hope you  _ stop _ thinking those foolish thoughts.” 

Snufkin offered a weak smile before looking back towards the sea. “I’ll try. I suppose it’s time I face the fact that both of you want this change.” 

“We do.” Snorkmaiden sighed softly. “It feels… good. Overall.” 

Snufkin clenched his teeth, closing his eyes as he took a quiet breath through his nose. “You wanted complete honesty?” 

“Please.” 

Snufkin stayed silent for a few moments, his heart making itself known to him in his head. “The reason this whole breakup has been hard for me to accept is because I feel like I was the cause of it.” 

The wind whistled in his ears, his body frozen to the rock he was sitting on. 

“I’m guessing you didn’t tell Moomin that?” 

“Definitely not.” 

Snorkmaiden snorted, a few chuckles coming soon after. “You weren’t  _ the _ cause of it, Snufkin. I don’t think there’s ever just one cause for these things. I won’t lie and say you didn’t play a part at all, but I don’t blame you if you’re worried about that.” 

“I was a little.” 

They sat in silence again, Snufkin keeping his eyes closed. He wasn’t sure when he’d started gripping his pants so tightly, but his fingers were starting to go numb from the force. 

“I appreciate you saying that though,” Snorkmaiden whispered. “I mean, I was jealous of you growing up. You could always capture his attention so easily, since you portrayed this air of ‘mystery’ and ‘wisdom.’ And it felt like you could cheer him up in an instant, when sometimes it would take me an entire day.” 

“That’s,” Snufkin’s voice cut out after that. He swallowed, finally opening his eyes so he could look at her again. “That’s not true.”

“I know. That’s just what it seemed like.” She turned her head, raising a brow at Snufkin. “Can we acknowledge the elephant in the room now?” 

Snufkin felt his heart flip in his chest. “I’m not sure what you —“

“Honesty, Snufkin.” 

He clamped his mouth shut, turning to the sea again. He forced his hands to relax, stretching out his fingers as he whispered, “I never… I didn’t try to come between you two, you know. Not really.” 

“But you do love him.” It wasn’t a question. 

Snufkin pressed his fingers against his thighs, his mouth dry as he nodded. “I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t apologize for feeling love.” Snorkmaiden shook her head. “That’s just sad.” 

“I suppose you’re right.” He took a breath, realizing he hadn’t taken one in awhile. “I’m not sorry for how I feel, mind you. I’m sorry for… how my feelings affected things.” 

Snorkmaiden scoffed again, laughing softly afterwards as she shook her head. “You’re silly sometimes. I  _ just _ said that you weren’t the reason we broke up.” 

“But I was a part of it, so I bear some responsibility.” 

Snorkmaiden rolled her eyes. “You know what responsibility you bear? Keeping us together for so long! You actually helped us a lot throughout the years! You’d assist Moomin with his more extravagant romantic ideas, or give him advice, or even talk to me and help me calm down after a fight. That’s why I never knew how to feel about you; so often it felt like you wanted Moomin all to yourself, but you’d always make it obvious that you wanted us to stay a couple.” 

Snufkin could only smile weakly, leaning back on his hands as he idly kicked his heel at the rock he was sitting on. “Well… like I said, I thought you two belonged together.” 

“But  _ why?” _ Snorkmaiden pressed, staring at him with her eyebrows crossed. Her fur took on a confused, orange tint. “If you love him, and I presume you’ve loved him for awhile, why  _ didn’t _ you try to get between us? Why did you think me and him had to be together?” 

Snufkin ground his bottom teeth against his top set briefly, glancing down at her left hand again before looking back to her eyes. “I know you want me to be honest, but this is the part that I don’t think you’ll believe.” 

“Try me.” 

Snufkin hummed, tilting his head up slightly to look at the fast-moving clouds in the sky. “Have you heard of the Red String of Fate?” 

“Hm… I’m familiar. They tie two people together, right?” 

“They tie soulmates together,” Snufkin clarified. “Romantic, platonic, or something else. If two people are supposed to be together, Fate ties a string on their left ring finger to pull them close.” He turned to look at her then, staring right into her deep, brown eyes. “And you and Moomin were tied together.” 

Snorkmaiden raised a brow, searching his face for a moment. “Are you joking?” 

“I’m not. I can see the strings; anyone born with a severed string can see them, and do with that information as they please.” 

“A severed string?” She sounded even more incredulous now. 

“That’s right.” Snufkin nodded. “Some people don’t have a soulmate, but a string still dangles on their finger.” 

Snorkmaiden rolled her eyes. “That just seems unnecessary.” 

“Well, it’s the truth.” 

“So,” Snorkmaiden trailed off, crossing her arms as her fur turned to a lighter orange. “You’re telling me that you’ve been so insistent on us being together because we have literal Red Strings tied around our fingers that only you can see?” 

“Well, you did,” Snufkin repeated, swallowing. He glanced away as he added, “At the start of this year, I saw Moomin’s string was untethered. And when I went to see you to try and find out what happened, you were already connected to a new soulmate.” 

“What — really?” Snorkmaiden’s ears stood at attention, her eyes widening slightly. “That can happen? Do you know who they are?” 

Snufkin shook his head. “Whoever they are, they’re far from the valley. Your string has been pulled taught all year.” 

“Wow.” Snorkmaiden put a hand to her cheek, her fur slowly changing into a bright pink. “I’m not saying I believe you, but I guess the idea of having a new, fascinating stranger as my soulmate isn’t so terrible. I do still like romance, you know.” 

Snufkin chuckled fondly, grinning a bit. “I know. I did help Moomin with romantic gestures, like you said, so I know what you like.” 

Snorkmaiden laughed a little, shaking her head. “My favorites were always the river rides. You two could really make a nice atmosphere together.” 

Snufkin’s heart skipped a beat as he looked away, his smile stretching tensely. “Is that so? Glad to hear it.” 

“But wait,” Snorkmaiden continued, “by your logic, does that mean Moomin just doesn’t have a soulmate anymore? That hardly seems fair.” 

“...” 

“Oh, well that’s just rotten! I should give ‘Fate’ a piece of my mind.” 

“Actually.” Snufkin stopped, closing his eyes before swallowing. “Moomin’s string attached to someone else a day later.” 

“What?” Snorkmaiden’s tone was just shy of pure shock. “Do you know who it is?” 

Snufkin laughed softly, letting his head fall forward to rest on his hand. “I suppose you could say I know him very well, yes.” 

The wind whistled between them for a moment, and Snufkin was painfully aware of how fast his heart was beating. It had been doing that a lot this year, it couldn’t be good for his health. 

He jolted when Snorkmaiden gave a sudden, loud giggle, and when he turned to look at her she burst into laughter. Clutching at her stomach, letting her head fall back as her laughs rang in the air and her fur erupted into a bright yellow — it made Snufkin’s cheeks turn pink. 

“Why are you laughing??” 

“Because  _ that _ I believe!” Tears formed in the corners of her eyes, she was so amused. “That actually explains so,  _ so _ much!” 

“What do you believe?” Snufkin questioned, tugging his hat down to conceal his eyes. “I didn’t say who his string connected to.” 

“You really didn’t need to, though, did you?” She took a breath, still giggling occasionally as she said, “So you’re Moomin’s new soulmate, and you promptly began panicking?” 

Snufkin tensed up, and he was certain his entire face was turning bright red as he looked at her. “What makes you think I —” 

She interrupted him with more laughter, shaking her head. “Oh, come on, you already told me you love him. How is saying he’s your soulmate different?” 

“Because he wasn’t supposed to be!” Snufkin actually groaned, digging his palms into his eyes. “Because I shouldn’t have interfered with his life so much. Who knows how happy he could be with you if I hadn’t been so selfish?” 

He could feel his ears burning as silence stretched between them. Snorkmaiden shuffled closer and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. 

“Who knows how happy he could be with you, though?” She whispered. “Is that really what this year was? You feeling guilty? Feeling like you’re pulling him somewhere he doesn’t want to go?” 

Snufkin swallowed again, bringing his legs to his chest and holding them close so he could rest his chin on his knees. 

“Oh, Snufkin.” Snorkmaiden sighed, taking her hand off him. “This is why you should talk to people more.” 

“Who would have believed me? I did try. I sent a letter to someone else with a severed string, and I tried doing my own research.” He turned his head, resting his cheek on his knee so he could look at her. “I just thought… reconnecting your strings was what I had to do.” 

Snorkmaiden frowned softly, her fur back to a plain white as she tilted her head at him. “And now what are you thinking?” 

“I don’t know anymore.” Snufkin looked down, finding a few shiny bits of sand to focus on. “Part of me still expects you two to end up together in the long run. I mean, people are terrible at finding their soulmates — it’s not uncommon for people to build a life with someone other than who Fate picked. So, even if the strings are a bit different to what they were before, nothing has to change.” 

Snorkmaiden only stared at him for a moment, and when she spoke it was clear she was trying to be careful with her words. “Is there a part of you that maybe… wants to listen to the strings as they are now?” 

Snufkin was certain his face was red as he nodded. “Of course there is. But, I… he’d never, I mean — it feels t-too good to be true?” 

Snorkmaiden chewed at her bottom lip, clearly trying not to smile. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard you stammer that much before.” 

“Oh, hush.” Snufkin groaned again, pressing his forehead into his knees and covering the back of his head with his hands. “I know I’m a mess. I actually became  _ sick _ while I was gone. I haven’t been sick since I was a kit! And when I came back I was practically sobbing into Moomin’s fur.” 

“Wait, really?” 

“You don’t have to sound  _ so _ amused.” 

Snorkmaiden snickered slightly before muttering, “That explains why he forgave you so fast.” 

“Like I said, he hasn’t completely —” 

“But he will, though.” She tapped his shoulder, so he turned his head again to look at her small smile. “You know he will.” 

Snufkin stared at her for a moment, taking in her soft, open expression. He sat up straight, putting his legs back on the sand as he took a breath. “I don’t want to assume. I know I hurt him; I can see it in our string.” 

“What?” Snorkmaiden tilted her head. 

“The strings can change to reflect the relationship,” Snufkin explained, holding his own left hand in front of him. The string lazily stretched behind him, in the direction of Moominhouse, and was still a bit dim. “A thicker, brighter string means things are going very well, and a dull, frayed string means things are very poor.” 

Snorkmaiden hummed, squinting at his hand as if she could see it. “I suppose that makes sense. You know, that’s kind of unfair, you having an advantage like that. He can’t so easily know what you’re thinking.” 

“I guess that’s why those with soulmates don’t normally see the strings?” Snufkin guessed, smiling weakly. “You’re right, it probably is unfair. But it’s quite distracting, so I might as well use the information.” 

Snorkmaiden raised a brow at him. “You don’t seem sorry at all.” 

Snufkin shrugged, trying not to smile any wider. “What? I can’t control what I see.” 

She rolled her eyes before looking towards the sea again. “But you’re still not going to try and be with him?” 

“Not as anything other than friends.” Snufkin looked down, kicking one heel at the rocks lightly. 

“Why?” Snorkmaiden leaned back on her hands. “If you love him, if you want to be with him, if you have a  _ literal _ string tying you together — why are you just ignoring all of that?” 

Snufkin stilled his feet, looking up into the horizon. “Because anything else is still hard to wrap my head around. It doesn’t feel real. I’ve spent the majority of my life believing I would never be with someone like that, that I was meant to wander forever and enjoy the world in its entirety with minimal attachments. And now… what am I supposed to believe? I’m still not used to the sight of my own string being uplifted instead of flapping in the wind, and anytime I see it glow bright or dim dark it’s all I can think about for hours. Besides.” He hunched over a bit, turning to look at her again. “I do still feel like I interrupted.” 

“Oh, for goodness’ —!” Snorkmaiden stopped herself, taking a deep breath instead before turning to him with forcefully wide eyes, her hands clasped together. “Snufkin, I hereby officially give you my blessing to date him, or court him, or  _ whatever. _ I literally do not care, and I really,  _ really _ don’t think Moomin would mind either.” 

Snufkin felt like his brain went to sleep as he stared at her.  _ Court _ him? Courting was such a long and arduous process with far too many rules. Who even enjoyed it? Did people really still court? Did Moomin court Snorkmaiden when they met? He couldn’t really remember, but he didn’t think so. It didn’t sound quite right. He blinked, shaking his head a little before laughing softly. “I’m really not interested in courtship.” 

“You are almost purposefully missing the point of my statement.” 

“I told you it’s hard for me to think about.” Snufkin sighed, looking back at the sea. “Can I ask you something now?” 

“You might as well.” 

“What really happened at the midwinter bonfire?” He brought his legs back up, crossing them this time so he could rest his elbows on his knees. “Because I feel like that had to be the moment your string finally broke.” 

“You really think that did it?” Snorkmaiden asked, looking off to the side as she thought about that day. “Hm… you might be right. The day started off normally enough; we both woke up during winter, so we decided to play in the snow for a bit, and the bonfire just happened to be starting that night so we went to enjoy it.” She shifted her position so she could rest her head in both of her hands, staring distantly at the water. “We were cuddling by the fire, my head on his shoulder, and I said how nice this was, and he said, ‘It is nice. I wish Snufkin could be here to enjoy it, too.’” 

Snufkin felt his heart flip at least twice. He swallowed, offering a weak smile. “Sorry?” 

She snorted, closing her eyes. “It’s not completely your fault. Anyway, I got upset and we argued a bit, but this time it felt different for me. It was more like… I think I was just angry because that’s what I was used to. It’s how a girlfriend should be, hearing something like that, you know? But deep down I just felt tired, even bored. When we’d have these arguments before I’d always ask, ‘Who do you love more? Snufkin or me?’ And when we were kids he’d say, ‘Of course I love you more, Snorkmaiden!’ And when we were teens, it became, ‘I love both of you, but you’re my girlfriend, Snorkmaiden.’ And at the bonfire this past year, it was ‘I love you both equally, just differently.’ And when he said that, I… it just made me think about  _ how _ I actually loved him, you know? Because there are different kinds of love. Maybe what I was pretending or forcing to be romantic was really just friendly. So, I tried paying more attention to how I actually felt when we were together.” 

“Mm.” Snufkin had his hands clasped together, idly pulling at his fingers. 

“And you know the rest.” She opened her eyes again, humming in the back of her throat. “Hearing about this soulmate business makes me wonder how long it took for me to attach to someone new. Was I ready right when it snapped? Had I already checked out emotionally? I thought I’d been giving Moomin my all until I just couldn’t anymore, but maybe that’s a lie to make myself feel better.” 

“The strings don’t automatically reflect all of your emotions,” Snufkin told her. “Creatures are more complicated than that. I’m sure you were trying your best.” 

“Thanks.” She dropped her hands, turning to smile at him. “You are a good friend when you’re not inside your own head.” 

He smiled back at her, stretching out his back a bit. “Glad to hear it.” 

She nodded once at him before standing onto the sand, stretching her arms above her head. “I’ve had enough sitting around. Want to collect sea glass with me? I’m sure Moomin’s just going to be working on the restaurant all morning, so we can meet up with him at lunch and tell him our talk went well.” 

“That sounds like a lovely time.” He hopped onto the sand as well, brushing off his tunic. “Are you going to be making another sun catcher?” 

“How did you know?” She chuckled, the two of them starting to walk along the shore. 

Snufkin smiled, keeping his eyes peeled for hints of smooth glass amongst the sand. “We are friends after all, I suppose.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter, specifically Snorkmaiden saying how she thinks her and Moomin's relationship would have been better if they changed together, is very much based on my own life, and some struggles I was having when dating someone I'd known since childhood. It can be tricky. 
> 
> I love writing dialogue, so I hope everyone enjoyed reading this!! The next chapter will include a very important talk with Mamma~


	11. Enlightenment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin and Moomin are spending more time together again, and it's as enjoyable as it is scary. But after a talk with Moominmamma, Snufkin realizes he shouldn't fight how he feels anymore.

Seeing Sniff again had been completely uneventful. He’d stared for a few seconds before saying, “Oh, hey, Snufkin! Haven’t seen you awhile. Want to hear about my new restaurant?” 

Snufkin decided to let him ramble this time. 

The next week, a new routine emerged. Every morning, Snufkin would head to Moominhouse right after breakfast, and If the weather was decent Moomin would work on the restaurant while Snufkin played music or talked with him. When the afternoon hit, they’d head back to eat with Mamma, Pappa, and whoever else was around, before heading off to spend time together. They’d do the things they normally did, such as cloudwatch, fish, make flower clowns, run around, hike to the Lonely Mountains or through the witch’s forest — anything that allowed them to talk and simply enjoy each other’s company. When evening hit, Moomin would head home since Snufkin needed some quiet time to recharge, but they’d always share a long hug before parting. Moomin would usually spend time with Snorkmaiden, Sniff, and/or Little My at that point, so it was a good trade-off. Plus, Snufkin felt up to joining them later sometimes. 

By the time next week hit, Snufkin was elated every time he’d look down at his and Moomin’s string glowing as bright as a distant star. It felt much better to embrace this new “normal” than try to deny it, but his insides would still clench and squirm if he thought about his rather personal talk with Snorkmaiden on the beach. 

_ “Who knows how happy he could be with you?” _

Moomin definitely seemed in much better spirits. Literally everyone told him so; one night Little My had gone on a particularly long tirade about how sad and mopey Moomin had been while Snufkin was away, despite Moomin desperately trying to silence her. Even Moominmamma would tell him such.  _ “I don’t think he’s ever been this happy in the autumn before.” _

When the year’s spring had first begun, Snufkin would immediately stop any daydreams he had about more romantic scenarios with Moomin. Now, the more time went on, the harder it was to stop himself. Especially when Moomin asked if he could sleep next to Snufkin in his tent every night. 

“I know we’ve already been spending pretty much all day together.” Moomin started the conversation after an afternoon of tree climbing, the two of them resting on their backs under a weeping willow’s canopy. “So I’ll understand if you don’t want to, but… winter is coming soon. I’d love to be able to be with you at night, too.” 

Snufkin felt his fur stand on end, his mouth turning dry as he processed the request. “I wouldn’t be opposed to it,” Snufkin whispered back eventually. “But we can’t just stay up all night talking. We’d need to actually wind down and sleep.” 

“Oh, definitely.” Moomin sat up, grinning down at Snufkin as his tail wagged slowly behind him. “After all, I need proper sleep to retain these good looks.” 

Snufkin chuckled, tilting his hat over his face to hide his own smile. “Oh? So if you didn’t get enough sleep, would you turn into a monster?” 

“Of course. I’ll get razor sharp teeth, and my fur will turn all bristly, and my tail will shrink into a stub — just awful, really.” 

“Sounds dreadful. Would your eyes turn red, as well?” 

“How did you know?” 

“And your ears will get matted.” 

“And I’ll get two inch claws!” 

“And your fur will turn all gray, or maybe blue?” 

“Purple with green spots, actually.” 

Snufkin could only laugh at that image, lifting his hat off so he could give Moomin an amused look. “Really?” 

“Too unrealistic?” Moomin laughed with him, scooting closer before laying on his side, his head resting on his upper arm as he kept smiling at Snufkin. “It could happen.” 

“It’s very unlikely.” Snufkin turned over as well, mirroring Moomin’s position so they could look at each other better. “But I suppose stranger things have happened.” 

They settled into a comfortable silence then, simply staring into each other’s eyes. It was moments like these that made Snufkin’s heart pound, especially when they were close enough that he could feel Moomin’s warm breath across his skin. When he couldn’t stand it anymore, he closed his eyes, asking, “What should we do now?” 

Moomin hummed, suggesting, “We could take a nap?” 

Usually Snufkin wasn’t one for naps, but they’d been so busy the past week and a half that a nap actually sounded enticing. “Sure. Right here?” 

“I was thinking so. But, maybe a different position?” 

Snufkin creased his brows together before opening one eye to look at him. “What do you mean?” 

“Well…” Moomin had a faint flush on his cheeks underneath that fur. “It might be cozier, and warmer, if we cuddled?” 

Both of Snufkin’s eyes snapped open wide, and it felt like a Hattifattner had just sent a shock right through his spine. 

“Friends cuddle, right?” Moomin whispered, glancing away now. “I think you’ve said that before.” 

“I did,” Snufkin whispered back, swallowing.  _ Control yourself. It’s a friendly action, not much different from a hug. _ He put a smile on his face as he replied, “We could try it. How would you like to…?” 

“Oh.” Moomin looked into his eyes again, brightening as he suggested, “I was thinking you could turn around?” 

Snufkin nodded, not trusting his voice as he rolled onto his other side. His heart practically burst out of his chest when he felt Moomin’s front against his back, and he took a sudden breath when that warm arm wrapped itself around his middle, pulling him as close as possible. 

“Does this feel okay?” Moomin whispered, that deeper voice so close to his ear sending tingles across his entire side. 

Snufkin only nodded again, closing his eyes as he tried to even his breathing. Moomin was bound to notice if he kept acting so strange; he needed to get his body under control. “Very warm,” he muttered. 

“Too warm?” 

Snufkin hesitated, taking a moment to press back further into him, his arm wrapping around Moomin’s to lock it there. “No,” he decided, hoping his rapid heartbeat couldn’t be felt. “Just warm.” 

Moomin settled then, shifting a bit against the ground to find the most comfortable position as he held Snufkin, who felt like his whole body was being slowly roasted over a fire. His head spun lightly even as he closed his eyes, daydreams coming to the front of his mind one after the other. Some were just Moomin nuzzling different parts of his face, others were of him turning around and kissing him, some even involved confessions of love from both of them. 

_ Please stop,  _ he pleaded with his mind.  _ This is literally the worst time to have these thoughts. _

“You can say no to this,” Moomin whispered, startling Snufkin out of himself. “But I was thinking we could fall asleep just like this every night, until the snow falls.” 

Every night? Snufkin swallowed, curling up a bit more as he whispered, “That sounds…”  _ Incredible, terrifying, amazing, dangerous, intimate. _

“You can think about it?” Moomin offered. 

“I think,” Snufkin’s voice actually cracked, and part of him wanted to die. “I would like that, overall.” 

Moomin’s grip tightened slightly from excitement. “You’re not just saying that for my sake, right?” 

Snufkin shook his head lightly. “I’m not. I promise.” 

“Okay, good.” Moomin’s snout nuzzled against the top of Snufkin’s head, sending another shiver down his spine. “Thank you.” 

Moomin managed to actually fall asleep soon after that; Snufkin could feel the way his breaths evened out. He himself was still feeling rather dazed, his daydreams ensuring his heartbeat was still rapid against his chest. Every night,  _ every night _ just like this? How would he ever be able to sleep again? Oh, he shouldn’t be so ridiculous; he was sure he could get used to feeling Moomin pressed against him. He was only reacting so much because this was the first time doing this, surely. He was adaptable, and besides, cuddling did feel very nice and cozy. 

He took a deep breath, holding it for a few seconds before letting it back out slowly to calm himself. This was fine, and normal, and something he wanted even if part of him still felt hesitant. But it’s not like he’d pushed for this; Moomin had been the one to request it. He could feel slightly relieved remembering that. 

With all this in mind, Snufkin took another calming breath before settling himself, sleep coming to claim him in less than a minute. 

* * *

“I told you, I know what I saw!” Little My yelled. 

“And  _ I’m _ telling you you’re mistaken.” Moomin rolled his eyes, arms crossed. “There’s no reason for worms to glow!” 

They stared each other down, standing in the middle of Moominhouse’s living room. Moominpappa was upstairs in his study, Moominmamma was sitting calmly by the fireplace while mending an old blanket, and Snufkin was enjoying a cup of herbal tea as he watched the argument with a small smile. 

“I saw glowing worms dancing in a puddle,” Little My insisted, “and if you don’t believe me then let me show you!” 

“Fine!” Moomin started stomping towards the door, calling behind him, “We’re heading out! Snufkin, I’ll meet up with you at the tent later.” 

“Have fun.” He lifted his cup in the air to send them off. 

“Do be careful,” Moominmamma called, not looking up from her needle. “It is rather dark out.” 

“Don’t worry,” Little My assured, grinning smugly at Moomin. “The glowing worms will light our way back!” 

Moomin scoffed. “And when that fails, the moonlight will be  _ just _ fine.” 

They half-grunted, half-yelled at each other as they walked out the door, shutting it loudly behind them. 

“They’re quite lively, don’t you think?” Moominmamma looked up to smile at Snufkin. “Just like siblings who grew up together.” 

Snufkin chuckled, placing the edge of his cup against his bottom lip. “Indeed. Little My and I certainly don’t fight as much.” 

“That must have been a blessing for Mymble,” Moominmamma joked, chuckling lightly as she turned back to her project. “Have you seen her lately, dear?” 

“I saw her during the past winter,” Snufkin replied, swirling his tea around. “She and her children were traveling with her new girlfriend.” Who just so happened to be Mymble’s  _ fourth _ soulmate, not that Snufkin knew how she’d acquired another one, and frankly he didn’t want to think too much about it. 

Moominmamma nodded. “And your father?” 

“I saw him right before spring, actually. His nose is looking a bit more gray these days.” 

“That will happen.” Moominmamma looked up at him. “If you see him again, do tell him to stop by. I think Moominpappa could do with a visit from old friends.” 

Snufkin nodded his agreement, and the two of them lapsed back into a comfortable silence. Well, it would have been comfortable for him, if his heart wouldn’t skip a beat every time he caught a twinkling in the corner of his eyes. He’d been avoiding looking at his soulmate string for a couple days now, as he didn’t want it to affect how he behaved around Moomin again, but tonight he couldn’t stop glancing at it. 

A red string as bright as a nearby star, and just a few threads thicker. If that was all the change there was, he would have been perfectly fine. But what really made his throat dry was the fact that there now seemed to be flecks of gold in between the strands. 

Gold strings were even more rare than severed strings, Snufkin’s found. He’d only personally seen two couples with them, one being Moominmamma and Moominpappa, and the other being a pair he saw in passing. That particular color was usually reserved for a love that’s lasted throughout the ages, or through great hardship. 

He held his left hand in front of his face, chewing his lip at the sight of the pesky string.  _ Aren’t you moving a bit too fast? _

“Something on your mind, Snufkin?” 

“Hm?” Snufkin lowered his hand back to his teacup immediately, plastering a polite smile on his face. “Nothing much.” 

Moominmamma stopped her sewing so she could give him her full attention. “I’d love to hear whatever it is you’re thinking.” 

Snufkin hesitated, drumming his fingers lightly against the cup as he looked towards the darkened window. “How can a person stop feeling selfish for wanting something that everyone else has?” He tilted his head down, placing his left hand on his knee so he could look at his string again. “Or, more precisely, how can someone stop feeling selfish when they finally have something they’ve secretly always wanted?”

Silence stretched between them again as Moominmamma considered what to say. Snufkin didn’t mind; he didn’t really need her to say anything. 

“Snufkin,” Moominmamma started, folding up the blanket she’d been working on. “I’m going to ask you something that will either make perfect sense to you, or will make me seem like a silly old woman. Does that sound all right?” 

Snufkin turned his head to her, raising a brow in curiosity. “Sounds all right to me.” 

“Very well.” She sat up straight in her chair, paws folded nicely in her lap as she looked over at him with her round, emerald eyes. “Were you born with a severed red string on your finger?” 

Snufkin jolted, almost spilling the remainder of his tea over himself. “Wh-what?” 

“Were you?” she asked again, relaxing slightly in her chair. 

Snufkin swallowed, setting his tea down on the coffee table before nodding. 

“Really?” She hummed quietly, standing up and placing the blanket in her chair so she could walk over and sit next to him on the couch. “I had a feeling it was either that or something else.” 

“But.” Snufkin felt his head spin lightly. “How do you know about them?” 

“Well, I was born with one, too, you know.” She chuckled when Snufkin’s eyes went wide. “Don’t believe me?” 

“It’s just…” Snufkin stared down at her own string, which was going straight up into the ceiling to reach her husband. “Your connection with Moominpappa looks normal. Like it’s always been there.” 

“Oh, thank you for saying that.” She giggled once, putting both of her hands to her cheeks in slight embarrassment. “I have wondered how it’s kept up all these years. I stopped being able to see the strings after ours seamed together.” 

Snufkin smiled softly, still a bit frazzled. “Your string is in wonderful shape, believe me.” 

Moominmamma smiled warmly before lowering her hands back to her lap. “What about yours, then?” 

“Mine?” Snufkin’s heart skipped a beat, putting his hands behind his back automatically. “It’s, um…” 

Moominmamma chuckled in amusement. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want. I have my suspicions anyway.” 

Snufkin was sure his cheeks were turning pink as he glanced away. “I still don’t fully understand. Did Moominpappa also have a severed string, then?” 

“Not when I first met him,” she replied. “He was first tied to — oh! Perhaps I shouldn’t say, actually.” 

“I’d love to hear it,” Snufkin insisted. He wasn’t usually one for gossip, but he felt like he  _ needed _ to hear this entire story. 

Moominmamma clutched her hands together, tapping her foot a few times on the ground as she thought. “Oooh, all right. He was first tied to the Joxter.” 

Snufkin felt his fur stand on end, immediately regretting his curiosity.  _ “What?” _ But his father was tied to Mymble! And their string didn’t seem to have anything wrong with it either. 

She smiled sheepishly at him. “I probably shouldn’t have told you. But it’s true; their string had red and purple stripes, showing equal platonic and romantic feelings.” 

_ Romantic? _ Snufkin echoed in his mind, desperately trying not to picture his father and Moominpappa together. “But… but, then, how…?” 

“Well, Moominpappa’s story is true,” she began to explain, leaning back against the couch. “We first met while I’d been caught in a storm. I’d been visiting a mermaid friend of mine with an air bubble she’d made, and unfortunately the storm hit just as I’d been swimming back home. I’m usually a very strong swimmer you know, but even I was having trouble fighting the waves.” 

“Mermaids?” Snufkin asked, leaning forward to rest the side of his head in his hand. “You’re friends with mermaids?” 

“Well, I was,” she clarified. “I haven’t seen them in years now. Anyway, afterwards he took me up on Hodgkin’s boat, and that’s when I finally took notice of his peculiar string connected to a sleeping mumrik. I was quite amused by the whole thing, since he’d been making it very obvious that he fancied me with flowery words. It wasn’t the first time, but like always I couldn’t help but think, ‘How sad that you can’t recognize your own soulmate.’” 

“I don’t know if it’s sad,” Snufkin said, looking thoughtfully into space. “It’s common for people to spend their whole lives searching and wondering, isn’t it? If it was really sad for someone to not be with their soulmate, then those with severed strings should be downright miserable. But I haven’t found that to be true.” 

“I suppose.” Moominmamma chuckled. “You have a much different attitude towards these things than I did at your age. I don’t know how you’ve been handling it, but I figured that since I wasn’t tied down to any one person, that meant I could simply enjoy relationships with anyone and everyone I wanted.” 

Snufkin stared at her, blinking once, twice, before he felt a bit more heat enter his cheeks. Was Moominmamma saying what he thought she was saying? 

“So, when I met Moominpappa, I figured it would be fun to indulge him,” she continued, not elaborating on her last statement. Snufkin wasn’t sure he really wanted her to. “Maybe all he was interested in was having a pretty woman on his arm, but that was all right. He was a handsome and strong man, which was enough to pique my interest back then.” 

“When did his string change?” Snufkin asked. “When did it break and connect with yours?” 

“I believe it was about a year later.” She sighed, closing her eyes. “We’d been dating all that time, and the Joxter’s visits had become shorter with longer stretches of time between them. When their string finally broke, I felt awful. I didn’t even know it was possible to break up a pair, and of course I felt responsible since I’d just been having a bit of fun with them. I went out to find the Joxter, to try and reunite them, but when I finally caught up with him he’d become infatuated with the Mymble and she’d snatched up his newly severed string like a fish to a hook.” 

“Ah.” Was that how his mother had acquired so many? 

“I went back to Moominpappa, sorrow weighing my heart so heavily that I couldn’t stop crying. I wasn’t sure what to do; I mean, I liked him, I wouldn’t have dated him for so long if I didn’t, but I wasn’t his soulmate. Surely a life with me wouldn’t be as fulfilling for him.” She turned her head to look at Snufkin, a twinkle in her eye as she smiled. “And then, once we reunited and shared a long hug, our strings connected, and… well, I had some conflicting feelings about it.” 

“I can understand conflicting feelings,” Snufkin muttered, trying not to look at his hand again. 

“I was actually angry at first.” She sighed. “Thinking things like ‘How dare he rob me of my own fun with others,’ and ‘If he gave up his soulmate for me, who’s to say he won’t give up on me if he meets someone else?’ I think I was secretly a little happy, too, but I didn’t really acknowledge that until he tried so hard to cheer me up, even when he had no idea what was wrong.” She put her hands on her cheeks again, closing her eyes. “He went diving in the sea one day, and he didn’t come back out until he’d found a clamshell that held a lovely pearl. When he gave it to me, I figured there was no use fighting our connection anymore.” 

Snufkin nodded his head, straightening up as he tried to process this new information. Moominmamma having a severed string, Moominpappa and Joxter, strings blending together without much fuss; it all sounded unbelievable. “When did your strings fully combine, then?” 

“Shortly after I found out I was pregnant,” she replied, smiling warmly at the memory. “I was so excited to start a family with him that I didn’t even care that I’d lost my soulmate sight.” 

Snufkin copied her smile, able to picture how happy she must have been quite easily. “That’s very sweet.” 

“Thank you.” She chuckled again, turning her head more forwards, but still keeping her eyes on him. “So, am I right in assuming you were talking about being ‘selfish’ because you have a soulmate now?” 

Snufkin felt his fur stand up again, turning his head away as he slumped down into the couch, gripping the edge of the cushion. “That… would be correct, yes.” 

“Can I guess who it is?” 

Snufkin internally groaned as he closed his eyes. “Is it really much of a guess?” 

She couldn’t help but laugh. “I suppose it isn’t.” 

“Sometimes I think this entire valley knows how I feel.” 

“Well, you do write a new song for him every year.” 

“Those aren’t  _ just _ for him! Why does everyone keep saying that?” 

Moominmamma simply laughed again, and when Snufkin opened his eyes to pout lightly at her she didn’t seem sorry at all. “Let me guess, your string tied to Moomin’s soon after you came back this past year?” 

“That’s accurate, yes.” 

“Well, I suppose I’m a little surprised.” She hummed, her smile still full of laughter. “I always assumed you two were natural soulmates.” 

Snufkin felt his face burn again and he quickly pulled his hat down to cover it. “Did you now.” 

“With how quick my son took to you? Of course. I thought, ‘There’s Fate at work. I hope it works out.’” 

“Snorkmaiden was his soulmate,” Snufkin informed her, curling his legs up to his chest as he kept his hat pulled down. “Though their connection was…” 

“Always changing?” 

He nodded. “It was fascinating to watch over the years, really.” 

“I’m sure it was.” Moominmamma leaned back on the couch then, causing a slight shift in the cushion. “But watching your own string is even more so, isn’t it?” 

“Sadly.” 

She chuckled, patting him twice gently on the shoulder. “It almost seems like you’re afraid of it, dear.” 

Snufkin chewed at the inside of his cheeks, staying curled up for a moment. “I don’t know if fear is the right word.” He lifted his hat, wrapping his arms around his legs instead as he looked at her, relaxing slightly from her warm, sympathetic expression. “I’m worried, and concerned. I still feel like I interrupted a Fated pair, though admittedly I’ve stopped feeling guilty about it. It’s rather hard to feel guilty when I see Moomin in such high spirits, and Snorkmaiden, too — I told her about the strings, by the way.” 

“Really?” Her eyes widened. “Did she believe you?” 

“A little? Hard to truly tell.” He rested his warmed cheek against his knee as he mumbled, “She at least believes that Moomin is my soulmate now.” 

Moominmamma chuckled, putting a hand to her mouth. “I suppose that’s quite easy to believe.” 

Snufkin let his eyes slip closed so he wouldn’t have to look at the teasing glint in her eye. “But even if I don’t feel guilty, I still feel selfish, like I was saying. Because I still want to travel on my own often, or at least through winter like normal, but at the same time I love having this connection to Moomin.” He paused, swallowing when he noticed his voice had gotten very quiet on that last part. “I used to think of the entire world as my soulmate, and I still want to think that way. But I also don’t want to give up any of what I have with him, not anymore.” 

The faint crackles of the dwindling fire in the fireplace filled the silence, and Snufkin could feel his slow, steady heartbeat in his chest. 

“Why is it selfish to want both of those things?” Moominmamma’s quiet voice drifted into his ears. “What I hear you saying is that you don’t want to give up a part of yourself to start a new relationship, or change one you have currently. And I think that’s perfectly fine.” 

Snufkin creased his eyebrows together before opening his eyes. “You think so?” 

She nodded. “It’s good to know who you are before dating someone. It’s easier to communicate and set boundaries that way. The best relationships are made up of two complete people choosing to come together; you run into trouble when you expect the other person to make you feel complete.” 

“True.” Snufkin lifted his head, taking a breath as he loosened the grip on his legs. “I don’t know. It still feels unreal, being tied to him after so many years.” 

Moominmamma hummed again, tilting her head. “Because it makes you feel like your relationship has to change?” 

“Not exactly.” Snufkin rested his chin on his knees, swallowing again as he whispered, “I don’t feel like it  _ has _ to change.” 

Moominmamma paused, letting Snufkin’s heart slowly speed up. “Perhaps,” she started, “you  _ want _ it to change?” 

Snufkin’s world turned blurry as he unfocused his eyes. That was the truth, wasn’t it? All of the romantic thoughts he’s had, all of the daydreams he’s indulged in over the years — he wanted them to happen. He wanted it all so badly that it could be overwhelming, even all-consuming. He wasn’t used to feeling that way; life was so much easier when he wasn’t attached to anything in particular. What would happen if the things he’d only been thinking became his reality? Would they fill his thoughts even more? Would the feelings completely swallow him? Or maybe he’d built this impossible standard in his mind, and he’d actually be disappointed by the real-life equivalent? And worse, what if he told Moomin what he wanted, and he was met with a confused look and that sweet voice telling him, ‘I like things just the way they are, I don’t want anything to change.’ Then Snufkin would have revealed himself for no reason, all because he was listening to a silly string. 

Snufkin took a deep breath, coming back to the present moment. “Maybe I am a bit afraid after all.” 

“That’s natural.” Moominmamma placed a hand on his shoulder, helping ground him a bit more. “It can be terrifying to be vulnerable. By showing someone our entire heart, it gives them the opportunity to break it. But, it also gives them the opportunity to show us how much they care.” 

Snufkin paused for a moment, his heart clenching a little as he admitted, “I feel like Moomin gives me his heart so freely. And I treated it terribly this year.” 

“Well.” Moominmamma took her hand off of him, letting him think. “Then perhaps it’s time to even things out.” 

Snufkin ground his teeth lightly, tucking his head more to rest his forehead against his knees. “Maybe you’re right.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mamma's time to shine~ Also, I threw in some PappaJox because I can and because I have an appreciation for that ship XD  
> I don't think mermaids actually appear in the Moomin series? But I love mermaids so they're going to exist here! (Edit: Many people have told me there are mermaids in this series, so woo!!)
> 
> I hope everyone enjoyed <3 We're approaching the end, let's see what Snufkin does ;)


	12. Getting Ready

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Moominhouse hosts a potluck before winter officially arrives, Snorkmaiden has an announcement, and Snufkin slowly works up the nerve to talk to Moomin about something very, very important.

As the days became shorter and the nights became colder, every permanent valley resident prepared for hibernation. Moomin had finished the roof of the restaurant awhile ago and covered the structure in tarps to prevent weather damage to the still unfinished walls, Moominhouse canned the last of their jams and vegetables so they’d have plenty to eat in the spring, and everyone made sure their doors and windows would be secure to keep out the wind. 

By Snufkin’s calculations, winter would be here within a week and a half, and when he mentioned this to Moomin, it became quiet. 

“Snorkmaiden’s been wanting to throw another party,” Moomin said after a moment. It was late at night, and they laid under a blanket side by side in Snufkin’s tent, their arms touching. “Nothing fancy, just a potluck with some records playing in the background. That would be a good way to end the year, don’t you think?” 

Snufkin hummed, turning his head to look at Moomin and take in his far-away look. He’d heard about the possibility of a late-fall party a couple weeks ago, and he had his own ideas for how that night could go. If he could muster the strength. “A little party does sound nice.” 

“I can mention it to Mamma tomorrow.” Moomin turned his head to look into Snufkin’s eyes. “Would you stick around if we held it in a few days?” 

Snufkin smiled softly, shifting the arm closest to Moomin until he found that soft paw and entwined their fingers. “I’ll stick around until you lay down to sleep.” 

Moomin smiled back, squeezing Snufkin’s hand lightly. “I always love to hear that.” 

“I know.” Snufkin turned on his side, resting his other arm over Moomin’s as he closed his eyes. He felt his heartbeat in his head, quick yet strong, and he shifted with Moomin until he was simply holding Moomin’s arm like a teddy bear. 

Moomin chuckled, the deep sound making Snufkin’s own body vibrate lightly. “You could just curl up on top of me, you know.” 

Snufkin only hummed in response, sleep coming to him rather quickly that night. 

Moomin laughed quietly again before whispering, “I do have a request for you, about the party.” 

Snufkin brushed his nose against Moomin’s shoulder to show he was still listening. 

“Could I have your first dance?” 

Snufkin’s fur stood on end, his eyes opening so he could look at him, but Moomin had a focused look directed at the top of the tent. He swallowed, whispering back, “So I won’t be playing any music for the party?” 

Moomin exhaled sharply, turning his head to pout a bit at him. “After what happened this past summer, I think I’d prefer you didn’t play at any parties for awhile.” 

Snufkin smiled weakly before burying his face against the top of Moomin’s arm. “Haven’t I apologized enough for that?” 

“I believe we’re only up to six apologies,” Moomin joked, not hiding his smile. “I was thinking a dance could be the seventh.” 

Snufkin laughed, shaking his head against Moomin. Silence settled between them for a few moments before he spoke, just loud enough to be heard, “I’d be honored. But I can’t guarantee I won’t step on your toes.” 

“That’s fine. You’re so light I could just pick you up and hold you if it becomes a problem.” 

Snufkin felt butterflies in his stomach at the thought. “I suppose that’s true. Hopefully it won’t come to that.” 

The wind rustled the tent, helping them settle a bit more underneath the blanket. 

“If you really want to play something, I won’t stop you,” Moomin whispered. “I do love hearing you play, just… maybe not that piece again.” 

Snufkin nodded, squeezing Moomin’s arm in his grasp. “That’s reasonable. I don’t have to play, if you want to…” He trailed off, feeling his face warm. He swallowed before finishing, “If you want to dance all night.” 

The longer Moomin was silent, the more Snufkin’s ears hurt from the lack of sound. 

“I would love that,” Moomin replied eventually. He gently tugged his arm out of Snufkin’s hold so he could turn on his side, those beautiful blue eyes staring straight into Snufkin’s own as their hands found each other and squeezed tight. 

Snufkin’s mouth was dry, his legs shifting restlessly from the stimulation. “We could also head off on our own later on, if we want a break from everyone.” 

Moomin smiled, leaning in slightly so he could nuzzle his snout against Snufkin’s forehead. “I could take your break with you, you mean?” 

Snufkin nodded, his head spinning a bit from the affection. “Yes. But for now, we should really get some sleep.” 

“You’re right.” Moomin squeezed Snufkin’s hand again before lifting his arm, wrapping it around Snufkin’s back and drawing him in closer. 

There have been plenty of nights now where they lay just like this, with Snufkin pressed right up against Moomin to feel that soft, warm fur against his hands and cheek. And yet every time, it still took a few moments for him to settle his heart before he could fall asleep. 

* * *

The potluck was a no-fuss affair. They held it inside Moominhouse since it was a bit too cold outside to be comfortable, and there was no dressing up required. Which Snufkin was grateful for as Mrs. Fillyjonk was still a bit cross with him over the grass stains he’d gotten on the last suit he wore. 

The morning of, Snufkin went fishing to provide his contribution to the potluck, honestly feeling a bit excited. It had been a long time since he’d prepared food for a group, and cooking with Moomin always felt very relaxing. His claws were a great help in fileting the pike, and it felt natural going between comfortable silence or amicable chatter. Plus, after they prepped the fish, Snufkin helped Moomin with the dish he was preparing: raspberry tarts. 

In the afternoon, Snufkin helped move Moominhouse’s living room furniture up against the walls to make space for dancing, and the guests slowly trickled in, each bringing a dish to leave in the kitchen. Mr. Hemulen brought a large, colorful salad made from some of his more unique but still edible plants, Mrs. Fillyjonk brought a very specific tea that she insisted on brewing in Moominhouse without any help, Mymble Jr. and the Inspector brought a flavorful sausage soup, Little My brought a bowl of blueberries she’d picked, Snorkmaiden brought three perfectly soft loafs of homemade bread, and Sniff helped Mamma make a large batch of mashed potatoes and garlic mushrooms. Everyone could eat as they pleased since there was no set time, so Snufkin spent the first part of the party enjoying the various dishes with his friends. 

“I think I’d like this bread recipe!” Sniff exclaimed, hands clasped together as he stood in front of Snorkmaiden. “Could you teach me?” 

Snorkmaiden huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. “Oh? It’s not too bland for you?” 

“I apologized for that!!” 

“Barely!” 

Snufkin snickered a bit, patting Sniff on the back as he held a plate topped with food in his other hand. “This is why you should never scorn a woman, Sniff.” 

“You’ve got that right.” Snorkmaiden stuck her snout in the air, and Sniff just sighed. 

Moomin chuckled, swallowing the bit of soup he had in his mouth before suggesting, “What if Sniff credited the recipe solely to you in the menu?” 

Snorkmaiden hummed as she thought that over before nodding. “I suppose that will do.” 

“Great!” Sniff beamed, and then stumbled forward when Little My hopped up onto his shoulder. 

“Want any recipes from me?” she asked, jabbing her thumb into her chest. “I make a mean gumbo.” 

Sniff pouted a bit, putting his hands on his hips. “You’ve doubted me since the beginning! I’m not taking anything from you!” 

“Well excuse me,” Little My scoffed, leaning her elbow against his head. “I just thought you’d get tired when you didn’t immediately see a profit.” 

“I’m not just about profits anymore!” Sniff insisted, his eyes practically sparkling as he stared up into space, his hands clasping together in front of his chest. “Now it’s about collecting as many recipes as I can! And, you know, the money will be nice, too.” 

The others started laughing, and it only took a few seconds for Sniff to join in. 

Soon it was time to dance. Moominpappa brought out his old record player and all the records he’d accumulated over the years, and he’d put himself in charge of changing them out when he wasn’t dancing with Moominmamma. He mostly had upbeat songs in his collection, which allowed everyone to do little improvised dances or simply stand around to mingle. When there was a steady beat, Snufkin would do a bit of tap dancing and enjoy a quick laugh when his friends tried to imitate him. 

It was during the slower songs that Snufkin came into trouble. He had promised to dance with Moomin all night, of course, but that didn’t stop his heart from giving a little jump whenever Moomin would turn to him, arm extended and a soft smile on his face. They stayed in the open position, just their hands clasped together, but that was enough to make Snufkin feel warm all over. He tried not to think about how everyone could see them, and he tried to tell himself that they weren’t drawing too much attention, but the thought always lay in the back of his mind. Thankfully, Moomin seemed to pick up on this pretty quick, and he’d talk to Snufkin in a low voice about something at random like an old story he wanted to recount together, or some simple commentary on the guests around them, or even just a stupid joke he’d heard somewhere. It definitely put Snufkin more at ease, but when he thought too much about it and realized just how well Moomin had come to learn his non-verbal cues he could feel his knees start to shake. He wondered when it was, exactly, that he’d decided to let Moomin know him so deeply, and he also wondered when the thought of being fully seen by Moomin made him feel a shy warmth instead of a gripping cold. 

How could someone fall so far and so hard and not realize it? 

It didn’t help that the first few times they danced together, something seemed to remind him of just how much seemed to be changing between them. The very first time Moomin reached for his hands, Snufkin made the mistake of glancing at Snorkmaiden and had only been met with a grin and a wink. He purposefully avoided looking at her during any songs after that. 

When the second slow song played, Little My clamored onto Moomin’s shoulder, grinning as she teased, “Don’t you two make a pretty picture? Are you only going to dance with each other all night?” 

Moomin’s face turned bright red, so Snufkin spoke up. “If you want to dance with Moomin, you just have to say so.” 

Little My stuck her tongue out at him. “That’s not what I’m saying and you know it!” 

“Little My!” Snorkmaiden plucked her off of Moomin’s shoulder with a huff. “Let them have their fun.” 

“What?” Little My crossed her arms as she was held in Snorkmaiden’s paws. “I just want to know who asked who, that’s all. Because both of them are cowards to me.” 

Snorkmaiden rolled her eyes before placing Little My on her head. “That’s none of our business.” 

Snufkin glanced at Moomin, who had his head ducked down. “Moomin asked me, actually,” he informed the ladies, smiling politely. “So I suppose you can call me a coward if you’d like.” 

“Why would you be a coward?” Moomin had to ask, lifting his head just to crease his brows at him. “It’s just… dancing.” 

“Oh, Moomintroll.” Snorkmaiden sighed, putting a hand to her cheek. “You are so brave, yet very stupid sometimes.” 

“Excuse me!?” 

Snufkin had to laugh, pulling one hand away to cover his mouth. He could only laugh more when Snorkmaiden continued: “But you’re better than Snufkin who has been both stupid  _ and _ cowardly this year.” 

“I don’t think either of us deserve this!” Moomin argued, crossing his arms over his chest while Snufkin bent over slightly from his laughter. 

“I say you do!” Little My scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Things would be  _ so _ much easier if the both of you were just honest with yourselves.” 

“Oh, they’re honest with  _ themselves _ all right,” Snorkmaiden mumbled, quiet enough where Snufkin barely heard. 

“If you’ll excuse us,” Moomin huffed, taking Snufkin’s hand again and tugging him to a different part of the room to dance. “We’ll catch up later when you’re not insulting us!” 

“They mean well,” Snufkin assured, still feeling amused. He was sure his face was pink, but he had already been nervous enough before they started dancing tonight that any extra nervousness seemed to just come out in laughter. 

Moomin just huffed again, squeezing Snufkin’s hand tightly. “I don’t even feel like dancing now. Let’s just wait for the next one.” 

“Sounds good.” 

Except the third time they danced together, Moominmamma came over with their old camera to take a picture. Moomintroll was the one who became far too embarrassed about that one, quickly bringing his mother into the kitchen to have a few words with her. Snufkin had to step outside for a moment since his nerves were making him laugh so hard. 

* * *

“Attention, everyone!” Moominpappa clinked a spoon against a water glass he was carrying, standing in between the kitchen and the living room. The guests slowly quieted and stopped dancing so they could give him their attention, and Snufkin exchanged a look with Moomin who simply smiled at him. “I just wanted to thank you all for coming,” Moominpappa continued, “I can’t think of a better way to welcome the snow than with all of you, our lovely neighbors. We’ve been through a lot together — meteors, floods, witches and hobgoblins — but this year seemed to be more calm.” 

“Thank goodness for that!” Mr. Hemulen exclaimed. 

Moominpappa chuckled. “Yes, yes, thank goodness. I do say, the most exciting thing that happened is the beginning of Sniff’s new venture! Do you have a name for the restaurant yet, Sniff?” 

“Still working on it!” Sniff replied, pulling at his fingers. “But it should be ready in the summer, thanks to Moomintroll! I’d love it if you all stopped by then.” Tears sprung to his eyes when his friends and neighbors started clapping for him, and he quickly flung himself into Moominmamma’s arms for a hug since she was close by. 

“I’m sure it’ll be a grand opening!” Moominpappa took control of the room again with his booming voice. “I know me and my family will come to support you, and I’m sure others will, too. I know I, for one, have been greatly enjoying taste-testing your recipes.” He put a hand to his face, obviously lost in thought over all of the good food he’d had. He tensed up and shook his head, getting back to his speech. “Yes, yes, no matter the success or the tribulation, this community always pulls through to help each other in the end, offering support no matter what. So, with that in mind,” he gestured to the crowd, his eyes crinkling as he smiled warmly, “I believe Snorkmaiden wanted to make an announcement to you all.” 

Snufkin creased his brows together as Snorkmaiden walked up, her fur a dark yellow, which he believed meant a more tentative joy. He looked at Moomin again, who was still smiling, but his ears were flat against his head and there was a crease in his eyes as he watched his old friend. 

“Good evening, everyone,” Snorkmaiden started. Her hands were clasped together at heart level, and she surveyed everyone with a smile before starting again. “I’m sure most if not all of you know me; my brother and I have lived in this valley for… oh, almost seven years now?” 

“Six years, ten months, and twenty days,” the Snork informed, adjusting his glasses briefly. “So, yes. Almost seven.” 

“Thank you, Snork.” Snorkmaiden chuckled, shaking her head fondly. “We’ve really enjoyed our time here. We’ve made wonderful friends and had all sorts of adventures, and Snork was able to build all sorts of new things — like his flying ship!” 

“I like that one the best,” Little My spoke up. 

“We know, Little My.” Snorkmaiden seemed to have more difficulty keeping her smile on her face as she continued. “I want you all to know that you mean a lot to me, and it is with a mix of excitement and sadness that I say it’s time my brother and I leave the valley for awhile.” 

Murmurs broke out amongst the crowd. Snufkin’s eyes widened, and he looked to Moomin again, who met his gaze with shining eyes and a sad smile, but no hint of shock or surprise. 

“It’s not because we don’t like it here,” Snorkmaiden continued, urging everyone to quiet down again. “We just want to have new experiences. Snork’s been thinking of finding research work in a museum or a library, and I’m trying to decide if I should attend some college classes or join a theater troupe. And we won’t be leaving right away — we’ll stay and hibernate for one more year, but when spring comes we’ll be off.” She paused then, blinking a few times before nodding her head. “That’s all I’ll announce right now. Snork and I would be happy to talk with you later, individually, if you want.” 

She walked back into the crowd, towards Moomintroll and Snufkin, while Moominpappa led everyone into a round of applause. “Thank you, Snorkmaiden. We’ll miss you, but I’m sure we all understand. Well!” He raised a hand up. “Back to the dancing, everyone! The night is still young, and it’s not too cold yet!” 

The sound of everyone’s hushed chatter was almost louder than the song currently playing, and a few people were already surrounding the Snork to talk with him. When Snorkmaiden reached her friends, she went in to hug Moomintroll first, the corners of her eyes a bit wet. 

“You did great,” Moomintroll whispered, rubbing her back gently. “I’m sure you’ll have a lot of fun out there.” 

She laughed softly, nuzzling his cheek before stepping back. “Thanks, Moomintroll.” She turned to Snufkin, opening her arms for him. “You can have a hug, too, if you want.” 

Snufkin could only stare, feeling a bit behind as he looked between the two of them. “Wait, you already knew?” 

Moomin nodded, wiping at one of his eyes. “She told me about a month ago. I mean, I knew earlier that she was thinking about going off to do something else with her life, but I didn’t think she’d actually  _ leave _ until a few years later. But,” he smiled at her again, “when the time is right, you just know it, I guess.” 

“And the time is right.” Snorkmaiden put her arms behind her back, her yellow fur becoming brighter by the second. “And I’ll come back and visit, of course. Probably in the summers.” 

“You’ll always have a place here,” Moomin told her, wiping at both of his eyes now. 

“Oh, don’t cry,” Snorkmaiden almost begged, her eyes looking far more shiny than before. “Because if you start crying then I’ll start crying!” 

“Sorry!” Moomin sniffled a little, laughing at himself before turning and heading off. “I’ll, I’ll get us some drinks.” 

Once he was out of earshot, Snorkmaiden took a deep breath, dabbing a few times at her eyes with her paws. “He can be so emotional, can’t he?” 

Snufkin nodded. “But it’s endearing, I think.” 

“Of course you think that.” She sighed softly, her fur still yellow as she looked at him. “Sorry I didn’t tell you about my plans earlier. I was still a little mad at you for leaving so suddenly in the summer, so this was my revenge.” 

Snufkin laughed shortly, shaking his head. “I don’t blame you. I am quite surprised Moomin didn’t tell me, though.” 

“He can keep secrets.” She paused for a moment. “But I’m sure he wrote it all down in his journal.” 

Snufkin nodded again, able to clearly picture a teary-eyed Moomintroll sitting at his desk and writing furiously. He chuckled a bit before focusing on her again, tilting his head. “Can I ask when you fully decided it was time to leave?” 

“Well, I’d been thinking about it for awhile,” Snorkmaiden admitted sheepishly. “I kept going back and forth, since obviously it’s never any fun to leave the great friends you’ve made, and I was a little worried about leaving Moomintroll alone. But… one day I just asked myself what I really wanted. And it’s this; it’s a change, it’s a decision to pursue something different, and I deserve to give myself a chance to try.” 

“I completely agree.” Snufkin folded his arms behind his back, needing to ask, “And me saying that your new soulmate is far from Moominvalley had no sway in this decision?” 

Snorkmaiden huffed softly, crossing her arms defensively. “Well, if I happen to meet a nice stranger whom I get along with, I’m not going to stop anything from happening. But that’s not  _ why _ I’m leaving!” 

Snufkin had to chuckle, shaking his head slightly. “All right, all right,” he relented, “where are you thinking of going?” 

“I’m not sure.” Snorkmaiden sighed, pulling at her cheek enough to pull her bottom eyelid down. “Snork wants me to apply at all of these prestigious universities, and I keep telling him that I don’t want to be an engineer but I don’t think he’s listening.” 

“What would you want to study?” 

“I was thinking medicine, maybe. But I’m still not sure if I’d rather join a theater troupe as a dancer.” 

Snufkin hummed, nodding as he considered that. “You could do both for awhile, see what you like better. There are plenty of schools that have both art and science classes.” 

Snorkmaiden let her cheek go, putting her hand under her chin instead as she looked at him. “Do you think I could handle both?” 

“I haven’t a doubt in my mind.” Snufkin smiled genuinely at her, offering, “I know quite a few schools you could look into, actually. I played in some of their concerts when they needed an extra musician, so if you mention my name it might help.” 

Snorkmaiden snorted once, crossing her arms as she grinned at him. “That should surprise me, but it doesn’t. You are a musical prodigy, after all.” 

“Mm, the professors seemed to think so. I also attended a few philosophy lectures, you know.” 

“Of course you did.” She rolled her eyes playfully. “Well, if you mark the schools on a map I’d be grateful.” 

Snufkin nodded. “I’ll do that tomorrow.” 

“Thanks.” Snorkmaiden smiled a bit more, her eyes glinting as she leaned in. “So, tell me about how your night’s going.” 

Snufkin felt his ears start to burn as he glanced away. “My night is going very well, thank you.” 

“Mm, I suppose dancing with your soulmate would make anyone happy.” 

“Could we maybe not talk so loud?” Snufkin asked, tugging his hat over his eyes. 

Snorkmaiden giggled again. “Oh, fine, you scaredy cat.” 

Snufkin kept his hat over his face, clenching his teeth together for a moment. He took a breath before tilting his head up to meet her eyes. “You won’t be able to call me that for much longer.” 

They stared at each other, Snorkmaiden’s eyes slowly widening with realization, and Snufkin’s feet shuffling nervously on the floor. 

“You’re going to tell him!?” She exclaimed in as loud of a whisper as she could. “When? Tonight? Tomorrow? Can I help?” 

“Tonight,” he muttered, glancing away. “And no, I have it under control.” 

“How are you going to do it?” Snorkmaiden asked, bouncing slightly on the balls of her feet in excitement. “You’re going to take him somewhere alone, right? Maybe play a song for him, and take his hands, and stare into his eyes and say how you long to make him yours —” 

“Please, stop talking,” Snufkin mumbled, actually covering his ears as he closed his eyes. “There’s no way I would say  _ that. _ It’s too possessive.” 

“Oh, right, right,” Snorkmaiden chuckled, calming down a little as her tail swished behind her. “Sorry. What are you thinking of saying, then?” 

Snufkin felt his mouth go dry as he lowered his hands. “I was just going to tell him how I feel. And then he can do with that what he wishes.” 

“Aw.” Snorkmaiden put her hands to her cheeks, smiling wide. “I think that will go over very, very well.” 

Snufkin felt his face burn again and he had to look away. He didn’t want to presume that he knew how Moomin felt about him, but, well… Moomin did wear his heart on his sleeve, after all. Still, there was always a chance he’d been reading his best friend wrong this whole time. 

“He’s coming back,” Snorkmaiden whispered before straightening up. “Act natural.” 

“Here you are,” Moomin greeted, his eyes much more dry as he handed a cup to Snorkmaiden first. “Apple and orange juice for everyone.” 

“Thank you, Moomin.”

“Yes, thank you,” Snufkin said as he was handed his cup. Except his voice had all the wrong inflection and he internally cringed. 

Moomin paused, his ears twitching as he stared at Snufkin. “Are you all right? Do you need to leave for a bit?” 

Snufkin cleared his throat, taking a sip of juice before he smiled at Moomin. “In a few minutes.” He glanced at Snorkmaiden, who was practically beaming at him, and quickly turned his attention back to Moomin. “We can step out together when we finish our drinks.” 

Moomin smiled softly and nodded. “Sounds good.” 

“I’ll say.” Snorkmaiden’s tail was still swishing back and forth as she giggled. “Well, I’ll leave you two alone. I should probably go rescue Snork from the crowd.” 

“I’m sure he’d appreciate it.” Moomin chuckled. “It looks like Little My is asking him a million questions.” 

“Of course.” Snorkmaiden sighed, leaning in to hug Moomintroll before turning to Snufkin. She brightened when Snufkin opened his arms up so she could hug him as well. “Have a good night, you two~” She sang, winking at Snufkin before finally heading off. 

“What was that about?” Moomin asked, tilting his head at Snorkmaiden’s retreating form. 

“Who knows?” Snufkin drank more juice so he wouldn’t have to talk. 

Moomin shrugged, turning towards Snufkin with a small smile on his face. “It’ll be good to take a little break. You’re sure you won’t mind me coming along?” 

Snufkin paused, keeping his cup against his mouth as he looked up into those dazzling blue eyes, his knees starting to wobble like before. He gave a quick nod, glancing away as he muttered, “I want you to come along, Moomintroll.” 

Moomin brightened, his tail flicking about behind him as his ears stood up. “Great.” He laughed softly, his cheeks turning a bit pink as he took a sip from his own drink. 

Snufkin could only smile, gripping his cup tightly between his hands as his heart pounded against his chest. 

Tonight was the night. Snufkin was ready.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, that cliffhanger should be illegal -- BUT it was a good cut-off point and I think you guys will be pleased with chapter 13 ;) 
> 
> I do want to say this; when first writing this fic I had not intended to give Sniff so much background character development with his restaurant, but I really love how it all turned out. Not only does it give a further sense of growth and change throughout life, the ultimate message of this story, but it also gave me something very convenient to have Moomin distract himself with. My best friend was like "I love how Moomin literally built an entire BUILDING to deal with his emotions", and yes. Yes, that is exactly it XD 
> 
> With Snorkmaiden, I absolutely love the idea that she leaves the valley at some point in her life to pursue something different. She's a character that seems so full of life, and someone that could be stifled by staying in the slow-paced comforts of Moominvalley. She's great <3 
> 
> I feel kind of bad, because I did not give Little My any character development really, but it's hard to improve upon perfection, y'know? 
> 
> I wish you all a very pleasant day, and I hope you never stop changing for the better <3


	13. A Big Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snufkin finally tells Moomin how he feels.

“It’s a bit cold to go out this far, don’t you think?” Moomin asked, hand-in-hand with Snufkin as he was led down the path to the beach. “I’ll be fine since my winter coat grew in, but I’m a bit worried about you.” 

“I’m plenty warm,” Snufkin replied, squeezing Moomin’s left hand reassuringly. “I promise.” He was even a little too warm if you asked him, what with how his heart seemed determined to pump more than enough blood into his face. 

_ Am I really going to do this?  _

_ “You made a plan for it.”  _

_ A plan and reality are two very different things.  _

_ “You already told Snorkmaiden you were going to. You can’t back out now.”  _

_ What if I can’t properly express how I feel? _

_ “That’s what the gift will help with.”  _

_ I hope he likes it.  _

Snufkin took a deep breath, letting it out slowly to try and calm his racing thoughts. He supposed it was normal to feel this nervous when you were planning on confessing your deepest emotions to the person that means the most to you, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. 

“Snufkin, are you all right?” Moomin asked, taking a few big strides to walk next to him instead. “You’ve been clutching at your scarf this whole time.” 

“Hm?” Snufkin took notice of how stiff his left fingers were, having indeed been grasping at his scarf since he left. He focused on stretching out his hand, laughing softly. “Perhaps I’m a bit cold after all.” 

Moomin frowned softly, his ears twitching once. “When we get to the beach, we could go into the bathhouse? I don’t think Too-Ticky’s moved in there just yet. It’ll help with the wind at least.” 

“Hm, maybe. After we walk along the shore a bit?” 

Moomin’s shoulders lost some of their tension as he squeezed Snufkin’s hand. “All right. Whatever you feel comfortable with.” 

Snufkin felt his heart jump. He could so clearly remember a time when Moomin had a more selfish approach to his relationships; when he’d care more about what he thought or how he felt during any kind of interaction, and when he couldn’t understand that sometimes his friends needed a break from him even if they care about him. And in that same vein, Snufkin could remember a time when he himself couldn’t understand wanting to be around anyone for an entire day straight, or when he’d spend so much time focused on a personal mission or helping someone out just so he wouldn’t have to think about himself or what he wanted. 

Was it when they started to meet in the middle, started truly understanding each other more, that these feelings started? When they were kids Moomin would act heartbroken every winter, but now he seemed accepting and understanding whenever the snow fell. And Snufkin used to never enjoy having anyone hug him, or hold his hand, or even know him too well, but now with Moomin he wanted all of those things and more. 

He supposed in the end it didn’t really matter when things changed between them. They just have, and Snufkin finally felt ready to accept that. He glanced down at the thick, bright, gold-speckled string that connected them, and he took a moment to realize that the sight felt normal to him. He had finally gotten used to seeing his string tied to someone else, and looking so different. And almost as soon as he realized that, he could feel his stomach flip around anxiously. Feelings really were dangerous things. 

“The ocean’s calm tonight,” Moomin commented, alerting Snufkin to look up at the near-approaching shore. “Think we’ll see any seahorses?” 

“I thought they didn’t come this far?” 

“They don’t usually,” Moomin admitted. “But a man can dream.” 

Snufkin felt himself grinning before he teased, “What is with your fascination for seahorses?” 

“It’s not a fascination!” Moomin argued, though his cheeks looked a bit darker in the moonlight. “I just think it would be fun to live in the ocean.” 

“Mm. You have a fascination for mermaids, too, right?” 

“Oh, that’s enough out of you.” Moomin gently pushed at Snufkin’s shoulder, but since they were still holding hands he didn’t go that far. 

“Sorry.” But Snufkin was laughing as he said it, so when Moomin narrowed his eyes at him he just laughed more. 

“You are not the least bit sorry.” 

“Not about this, no.” 

Moomin huffed, squeezing Snufkin’s hand before starting to speak as if he was addressing an audience. “Is this why you invited me along tonight? To laugh at me? To mercilessly tease me for your own amusement? What cruel reasoning!” 

Snufkin was laughing hard enough that he had to cover his mouth. They were walking along the shore now, the moonlight glinting beautifully on the water as he shook his head. “No, no. But you are rather fun to tease.” 

Moomin scoffed, tilting his head up so his snout stuck in the air a bit. “Well, I never.” 

Snufkin snorted, ducking his head down to cover his whole face with his hand as his shoulders shook with laughter. “You are ridiculous.” 

“And you,” Moomin poked at his shoulder, “have an adorable laugh.” 

Snufkin bristled, still chuckling a bit as he lifted his head to look at him.  _ “Adorable?”  _

“You heard me.” Moomin was grinning now, his free hand resting on his hip as he nodded once. “It’s adorable. You’re adorable.” 

“I am  _ not.”  _ Snufkin wasn’t sure if he felt indignant or embarrassed, but he was sure his face was turning a bit red now. 

“Well, I think so,” Moomin argued, clearly enjoying himself. “And you won’t be able to change my mind.” 

Snufkin pursed his lips, searching Moomin’s face for a moment before looking towards the sea. “Well, I’ll just say it’s nice to see you so confident.” 

“Thank you.” 

They walked in silence for a bit, and for once the silence made Snufkin feel even more nervous. Because he should probably put his plan into action, now that they were approaching a certain clearing of rocks. 

“Hold on a second,” Snufkin told him, gently pulling his hand away. “I need to get something quick.” 

Moomin tilted his head, one ear flopping down. “All right?” 

Snufkin simply smiled at him before clamoring over a pile of rocks close to the grass, reaching his hand underneath a certain one to pull out the gift he’d made. Before pulling it out fully, he turned to Moomin. “Close your eyes.” 

Moomin’s eyes widened a bit before he followed the instruction, his tail swishing behind him. “All right. They’re closed.” 

“Good.” Snufkin took a breath to collect himself before pulling out the gift he’d made, softly padding back over to him. “Hold out your paws.” 

“This is far too exciting for an autumn evening, Snufkin.” 

“Well, I suppose I don’t  _ have  _ to give you what I made just for you —” 

“Enough suspense!!” 

“All right, all right.” Snufkin chuckled before gingerly placing a large, dark-wood flute into Moomin’s eager paws. “You can open your eyes.” 

Moomin snapped his eyes open, his fingers grasping the flute as he held it a bit higher. His jaw dropped slightly as he turned it all the way around, his eyes widening as he began feeling the smooth sides of it, gripping the instrument between his paws and seeing just how perfectly it fit between them. Then, Moomin ran his fingers across the special flute block Snufkin had tied by the mouthpiece with twine; a small, hollow heart with the tops ending in swirls instead of coming together completely. “You… you made me a flute?” 

Snufkin nodded, his fingers pulling at each other as he tried to smile despite the nerves tangling in his gut. “Yes. This flute imitates the sound of the deep woods. So, whenever you play it, especially during winter, you can be comforted in knowing that we’re both hearing the same thing.” 

“Really?” Moomin still seemed to be in awe as he looked at the instrument. He licked his lips before holding the flute to his mouth, giving a tentative blow. He only knew how to play a few notes, but the medium pitch and resonating timbre of the flute made those few notes sound exquisite. 

Snufkin took the time to take a few more breaths, smiling a bit more when Moomin stopped playing. “See?” 

“Snufkin, this is…” Moomin held the flute to his chest, his ears flat against his head and his tail curling a bit. He stared straight into Snufkin’s eyes, sending his heart right into his head. “Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome.” Snufkin ducked his head down, noticing that his hands were now just clasped tightly together. 

“This must have taken so long,” Moomin whispered, his fingers stroking along the tops of the heart once more. 

“Not when you know what you’re doing,” Snufkin replied, shrugging easily. “This is what I worked on during most evenings for the past month, when you were with the others.” 

Moomin clutched it even closer to his chest, the corners of his eyes growing shinier by the second. He laughed softly, ducking his head down. “I feel a bit guilty now. You didn’t have to make me something so special. I know we keep joking about ‘seven apologies’ but you’ve already done enough to —” 

“No,” Snufkin interrupted, feeling a small, cold panic rise in his chest. “No, Moomin, I didn’t make this because I felt guilty, I made this for you because I…” He trailed off, his mouth completely dry. He was fully aware of how the cold wind bit at his skin, and he could feel his fingers becoming stiff the longer he clutched his hands together. 

“Because?” Moomin whispered, tilting his head slightly. 

Snufkin swallowed, glancing down. “Sorry, I… I need a moment.” 

“That’s okay.” Moomin gently placed his hand on Snufkin’s shoulder, squeezing it briefly before letting go. “Take all the time you need.” 

Snufkin felt his heart jump into his throat, and he had to laugh at himself. He shouldn’t react so strongly to simple words, even if they did sound incredibly sweet coming from Moomin’s mouth. He brought both of his hands to his face, hiding slightly as he muttered, “I don’t think you have any idea what you do to my heart.” 

The wind whistled between them. Moomin cleared his throat before his fingers brushed against one of Snufkin’s hands. “May I?” 

“Hm?” Snufkin hummed, letting Moomin take his hand. He felt his fur stand on end when Moomin placed the hand on his soft, white chest, directly over his heart. “Moomintroll?” 

“This is what you do to mine,” Moomin whispered, his heartbeat strong and fast against Snufkin’s hand. 

“Oh.” Snufkin couldn’t dare look into Moomin’s eyes right now, instead keeping his gaze on his own hand, which almost felt warm enough to burn. It just had to be his left hand against that beautiful fur, didn’t it? He curled his fingers, watching them disappear into the white expanse before he slowly took his hand off, holding it tight against his own chest now as he ducked his head down. 

“Is it similar?” Moomin whispered, his low voice sending tingles down Snufkin’s ears and neck. 

“Yes,” Snufkin whispered, feeling that cold panic strike his chest again. He swallowed, shaking his head as he closed his eyes. “Wait, I, I’m sorry, I wanted to do this differently, I’m just having some t-trouble expressing this how I planned to.” He clenched his teeth, hating how much he was stuttering. He felt like a mess and he was sure he must look like one, too. This wasn’t like him, he could always at least act confident and calm even if he felt the opposite. This wasn’t right, he shouldn’t say anything now, he should just leave and try again in the spring —

“Like I said,” Moomin’s gentle voice drifted in between his thoughts. “Take as much time as you need. I’ll always wait for you.” 

Snufkin could feel his knees starting to wobble. He took a deep breath that honestly sounded more like a gasp, since he hadn’t been breathing properly for awhile now. “Moomintroll,” he breathed, finally looking up to meet his eyes. He steeled himself, taking a moment to enjoy the small smile on Moomin’s face before he was finally able to get the words out. “I love you.” 

He did it. He finally,  _ finally _ told him, and now he could be quiet and relax a little. 

So why did more words keep pouring out of his mouth? 

“I love you so much that it wrecks me. Sometimes you’re all I can think about, and I know that must seem odd to hear coming from me because I know I act detached most of the time, but that’s only because it’s terrifying to feel this much. I don’t know how you do it, show everyone how you feel all the time without fear — even tonight you took the lead which I’m sorry for. I’ve loved you for so long, but I felt like I needed to keep it a secret because I thought you were meant to be with Snorkmaiden — and I know,  _ I know, _ we’ve been over this already, but you need to understand just how  _ long _ I thought that way, and why it’s been so difficult to imagine anything different even if all I really want is to be able to call you my home. To be able to cuddle under the stars, and kiss your handsome snout, and talk with you about everything that’s on my mind, and to say I love you countless more times because it feels so  _ freeing _ to finally be able to speak something so true.” 

Snufkin was panting by the end of his little outburst, and once his brain caught up with everything that he’d just said he felt his body go cold, every ounce of heat pooling into his face. He covered his mouth with both of his hands, his eyes wide as he stared up at Moomin. This time he was sure his heart would beat right out of his chest, his thoughts nothing but static. Part of him wanted to run, but his feet were frozen in place, so all he could do was watch Moomin, who probably thought he was crazy. 

“Wow,” Moomin breathed, his paws wrapped tightly around the flute, his eyes just as wide. “I think I need a moment now.” 

Snufkin audibly groaned, lowering his head so he could cover his face with his arms. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say all that — feel free to ignore it all if you want.” 

“No, I’m glad you said it,” Moomin clarified, one of his paws coming to rest on Snufkin’s shoulder again as he stepped closer. “I just didn’t expect… Snufkin, please look at me?” 

Snufkin clenched his teeth together, needing to stop himself from shaking his head. He took a breath before lifting it, still covering the bottom half of his face with his fists as he looked at his dear friend. 

Moomin smiled, the hand on Snufkin’s shoulder moving to the back of his neck, gently gripping the base of his head as he whispered, “I love you just as much if not more.” 

Dizziness overtook Snufkin so quickly that he actually stumbled forward, needing to brace himself against Moomin’s chest. His head burned where Moomin touched, but it was a good kind of burn; like how a hot spring felt against aching skin. “Oh?” 

Moomin laughed, the deep sound sending vibrations up Snufkin’s arms. “Is this really a surprise? I thought I was being rather obvious since you’ve come back.” 

Snufkin felt embarrassment shiver throughout his entire body. He buried his face into Moomin’s shoulder, muttering quietly, “I didn’t want to assume — I mean, you’ve always been very friendly and affectionate.” 

“I suppose.” Moomin wrapped his arms around Snufkin’s waist, pulling him as close as could be before nuzzling the top of his head through his hat. “But I hope there’s no doubt now. I love you, Snufkin. So often you  _ are _ all I can think about, especially when I get to hold you like this.” He chuckled, and Snufkin pulled his arms out so he could wrap them around Moomin’s neck. “You know, it’s kind of funny. I always thought I felt things more deeply, but hearing you say all this just now, it almost seems like you’re the one who has more feelings.” 

“Oh, I see it’s my turn to be teased, is it?” Snufkin smiled as he felt Moomin laugh against him. 

“Well, I get to tease you so rarely.” 

“Oh, please, you find a way. Like calling me  _ adorable.” _

Moomin laughed more, squeezing Snufkin as he nuzzled his head again. “I hope you know that this little performance has cemented that idea in my mind forever.” 

Snufkin groaned quietly, closing his eyes as he let his head rest entirely against Moomin’s arm. “Again, I didn’t mean to say so much.” 

“What did you mean to say, then?” 

“Preferably I would have stopped talking after ‘I love you.’” 

“Aw, really?” Moomin rubbed at his back, chuckling a little, his low voice once again sending shivers across Snufkin’s skin. “But I quite enjoyed hearing about how I ‘wreck’ you.” 

Snufkin bristled, his grip tightening around Moomin. “... Did I really use that word?” 

“Oh, yes. There’s no way I’d forget something like that.” 

“Great.” Snufkin resisted the urge to groan again, instead clutching Moomin’s fur in his fists as he took a breath. He had already thoroughly embarrassed himself, so why not say even more embarrassing things? “Well. It’s true, you know. You’re the only one who can reduce me into such a mess.” 

“I feel honored,” Moomin joked, gently pulling Snufkin’s hat off his head so he could nuzzle his snout into his hair. “Really though, there’s nothing better than seeing you let everything go. That’s why I love it when I can get you to laugh so hard; I feel like you don’t get to do that often.” 

“I don’t,” Snufkin agreed, leaning into Moomin’s snout. His head still felt dizzy, the warmth of their embrace not helping him in the slightest. But, for once, he rather enjoyed the foggy feeling in his head. 

“You know,” Moomin whispered, his paw idly stroking up and down Snufkin’s back. “I used to always worry about not being enough for someone. But, with you, I always felt like I was a bit too much. Too emotional, too expressive, too… attached. That’s why I’m actually really, really glad you did say all of that, even if you didn’t mean to. Because it makes me feel like maybe I’m not too much. Maybe I’m just right.” 

Snufkin smiled softly, lifting his head and moving back just enough so he could caress Moomin’s cheek, staring right into his big, ocean blue eyes. “You have always been enough, Moomintroll,” he whispered. “And you are just right for me.” 

Tears pooled in the corners of Moomin’s eyes. He moved his free hand to cup the back of Snufkin’s head again, holding him there so his snout could start nuzzling across Snufkin’s forehead, his cheek, his neck — across whatever he could reach comfortably. Snufkin wasn’t prepared; his breath kept hitching, and it felt like a cloud had seeped its way into his body, making everything light and fuzzy. Moomin was a strong, ocean wave, and he was a ship going wherever the current took him. 

“Moomintroll,” Snufkin whispered eventually, gently pushing at his chest. His vision blurred at the edges as he looked into Moomin’s widened eyes, so he shook his head a little before gripping Moomin’s face between his hands. “Let’s not get too carried away now.” 

Moomin’s cheeks darkened immediately, his eyes glancing away. ”Sorry.” 

Snufkin smiled softly, leaning in to kiss the tip of his snout. “You don’t need to apologize.” He paused for a moment before placing another kiss to the side of his snout. “I did enjoy it after all.” Another kiss, closer to his face. “But it’s getting late.” A kiss to his cheek. “And I want to ask you something.” 

“Ask away,” Moomin whispered, his voice cracking on the first word.

Snufkin grinned a bit, glad he was no longer the only one acting so affected. “Mm,” he hummed, kissing lower on his cheek, “Maybe it can wait.” 

Moomin swallowed, his arms wrapping around Snufkin’s waist again to pull him flush against his belly. “We have time.” 

Snufkin chuckled, pulling away just enough so he could look into Moomin’s eyes again. “Time for my question, or time for more kisses?” 

Moomin flushed further, his eyes looking anywhere but at Snufkin. “Wh...whichever.” 

Snufkin bit the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning any wider. Maybe he shouldn’t tease Moomin so much, at least not right now. He slid his hands down to grasp Moomin’s shoulders, squeezing once. “I can’t help but notice you don’t exactly seem surprised by my little confession.” 

“Ah, well.” Moomin’s ears twitched, his eyes looking up towards the sky. “I suppose I wasn’t completely shocked.” 

“Was I being that obvious?” Snufkin had to ask, brushing a few fingertips along the side of Moomin’s head, and loving the way the fur bristled underneath his touch. 

“Not…” Moomin paused, his eyes moving back down to look at him. “I mean, I don’t think you were obvious about it. But I couldn’t help but feel hopeful when you kept accepting my advancements.” He pressed his snout against the side of Snufkin’s head. “And tonight, seeing you so nervous in front of me, and receiving something so heartfelt from you — it just seemed like the right conclusion.” 

“Mm.” Snufkin closed his eyes, gently pressing his head back against Moomin’s snout. “Were you worried you’d be wrong?” 

“Maybe a little,” Moomin admitted. “But my heart felt so full that I didn’t dwell on that for too long. The idea that you felt the same for me, it was too enticing not to follow.” 

Snufkin smiled a bit more. “You really are brave, Moomintroll. I hope you know that.” 

“Thank you.” Moomin squeezed him gently. “Can I ask you something now?” 

“I don’t see why not.” 

“Well…” Moomin hesitated, gently pulling his snout away so Snufkin would open his eyes and look at him again. “You mentioned that you’ve loved me for a long time?” 

Snufkin stiffened, his fingers curling against Moomin’s fur again as he ducked his head down. “Yes, I did say that.” 

“And it’s true?” 

“Yes,” Snufkin confirmed, “but I’d rather not say for how long, because I’m not even that sure of it myself.” 

“That’s all right.” Moomin chuckled, nuzzling the top of his head again. “I’ve always known that I loved you, I just don’t think I quite knew how I loved you until this year. Does that make sense?” 

“It does.” Snufkin smiled softly, resting his forehead against Moomin’s shoulder. “When you figured out how you felt, did you ever think about telling me?” 

“Mm…” Moomin’s low, hesitant hum made Snufkin’s ears tingle. “Well, when I fully figured it out, you were avoiding me, so… I didn’t think it would go over too well. I thought saying anything would just push you further away.” 

Snufkin clenched his teeth. “I feel ashamed to say that with the headspace I’d been in, you probably would have been right.” 

Moomin sighed softly, pulling out of their embrace so he could put Snufkin’s hat on his own head before taking Snufkin’s hands, though the flute still rested between one of them. “When did you decide to tell me?” 

“Oh.” Snufkin swallowed, staring at their hands as he thought of what to say. “Well, after a talk with Moominmamma, I thought it might be a good idea. I… I know I don’t always say what’s directly on my mind, especially if it’s about missing you or wanting to be with you, and it seemed a bit unfair.” He looked up, feeling a shiver up his spine from the pleased look Moomin was giving him. “After all, you’re never shy about telling me those things. So, I started making the flute, and thinking about what I wanted to say.” 

“It really is beautiful,” Moomin complimented. He squeezed Snufkin’s hands before letting go, just so he could stroke a fingertip along the heart block on the top of the flute. “I can’t help but notice this little detail.” 

Snufkin laughed softly, his hands coming together again so he could pull at his fingers. “Yes, well.” He glanced away, the heartbeat in his ears louder than the ocean beside him. “I thought you’d like it.” 

Moomin hummed, his soft paw reaching over to cup Snufkin’s cheek, gently turning his head back to face him. “Does it symbolize anything in particular?” 

Snufkin felt his mouth turn dry as he took notice of the wide smile on Moomin’s face, the green hat on his head drawing even more attention to it. 

“Because if left to my interpretation,” Moomin continued, his eyes glinting in the moonlight, “it seems like you’re giving me your heart.” 

Snufkin bristled, a shiver rolling through his entire body as he closed his eyes. “Well, I… you can th-think that.” 

Moomin laughed softly, and Snufkin jumped when he felt that snout nuzzling against his forehead. “Is it true, though?” 

Snufkin swallowed, his fingers starting to hurt from how much he was pulling on them. “Moomintroll,” he whispered, opening his eyes and taking a breath to steady himself, “I think it’s time I admit that you’ve had my heart for quite awhile.” 

Moomin smiled even more, pulling Snufkin into a spinning hug, swirling him through the air without any trouble. “I’ll be sure to treat it carefully,” he promised, nuzzling all along his cheek and neck again. 

Snufkin cleared his throat, tucking his shoulders a bit higher as a laugh bubbled out of him. “It’s, ah… I believe you. Could you put me down?” 

“Oh!” Moomin exclaimed, quickly setting his feet back onto the sand. He took a step back, clutching the flute in both of his hands as he smiled weakly. “Sorry. Got carried away again.” 

“It’s all right,” Snufkin assured, even if his skin felt ablaze every time Moomin nuzzled him like that. He cleared his throat again, smoothing out his tunic as he chewed at the inside of his cheek. “I do enjoy it, you know. It’s just…” 

“A lot?” 

“A lot for right now,” Snufkin clarified, looking up at him with a small smile of his own. “But still not too much, all right?” 

Moomin smiled a bit more, his shoulders relaxing a bit as he nodded. “Good to hear.” 

Snufkin chuckled a bit, crossing his arms as he teased, “You can be very forward sometimes, though.” 

Moomin’s face was bright red underneath his fur, and he turned his head to the side in embarrassment. “Well, when you came back, I… I thought if I just kept flirting with you, then either something would happen or you’d tell me to stop.” 

Snufkin couldn’t help but laugh at that, clutching at his stomach as he doubled over. “R-really? That was your plan?” 

“What?!” Moomin turned just to pout at him, putting his paws on his hips. “What else was I supposed to do? I thought being direct would scare you away again! But I knew I loved you, and I knew I wanted you in my life in one way or another, so… I thought I’d just follow your lead, you know? I thought ‘If Snufkin wants to be anything other than friends, I’ll make it clear that I want that, too.’” 

Snufkin was still laughing and shaking his head. “And if I didn’t? If I just wanted to stay friends, you would have been fine with that?” 

“I think so.” Moomin let his arms relax by his sides again. “I mean, we’ve been friends for so long it’s not like it would have been hard to continue like that. As much as I love holding you and nuzzling you, I’m happy just being around you, too.” 

Snufkin felt as if a wind was swirling itself inside his body as he looked at his dear friend. “I’m happy being around you, too.” He took a breath, lowering his head slightly. “It’s interesting, isn’t it? How the love between us has always been there, slowly shifting and changing.” 

Moomin chuckled a bit, stepping forwards again to place his paw on Snufkin’s shoulder. “Well, I’m really, really glad about this change.” 

Snufkin felt his heart leaping inside his chest. He closed the distance, hugging him once more to rest his head against his shoulder and grip that soft fur between his fingers. “I’m glad for it, too.” He spoke softly into the air, enjoying the warmth this embrace brought him. It felt like a dream to be here, as close to Moomin as he’s always wanted; to actually enjoy the way his emotions bubbled right at the surface, ready and willing to be perceived by the one he loved. But this was reality, and the thought of that made his whole body feel light again. He could get used to this new normal, and he honestly couldn’t believe that he’d actively tried to sabotage this beautiful moment from happening in the beginning of the year. 

Part of him wondered how things would have gone if he’d accepted the changing strings right away; if he’d let nature run its course naturally. Would they have reached this point sooner? Or would it have taken even longer, since neither of them would have had a reason to act any different around each other? Right now, he couldn’t really bring himself to care. All that mattered was right now, with Moomin’s warm arms wrapped around him, the sea’s winds blowing at his hair, and his body relaxing completely against the beautiful creature in front of him. 

Snufkin didn’t try to stop his smile as he turned his head, kissing the side of that handsome snout before whispering, “You’re my soulmate, Moomintroll.” 

Moomin’s eyes widened as much as they could, his ears twitching a few times as his cheeks slowly bloomed with more color. He swallowed before nuzzling Snufkin’s forehead, returning the sentiment with a whisper of his own. “You’re my soulmate, Snufkin.” 

* * *

This winter was very different for Snufkin. He still left to go on his travels once Moominvalley took to hibernating, and he still shared a very heartfelt goodbye with Moomin (albeit with more nuzzling this time), and he still felt in high spirits as he set off on his own once more. But this year, he had a not-so-little red string on his finger that stretched out into the horizon, always letting him know the way back to the home he’d found so many years ago. And it wasn’t just red anymore; one, winding thread amidst the string was solid gold. It was just a little too distracting for his tastes, but he didn’t mind looking at it at night and remembering the good times he and Moomin have shared over the years. 

Some winters he’d travel through as many towns as he could, and other times he’d only walk through the woods, preferring prolonged peace and quiet. This time he wanted the latter, just so he could think and reminisce about all that he’d done the past year, even if quite a lot of it was embarrassing. It was good to think through these things so he wouldn’t make the same mistakes, and besides, it allowed him to compose more songs. And yes, these ones were just for Moomin, not that he’d admit that to anyone else. 

When it was time for Snufkin to head back to the valley, he noticed that he was considerably more excited than past years as well. His feet travelled quicker, his lips were almost always upturned into a smile, and his eyes would constantly drift to the sight of the red string in front of him, guiding him even though he didn’t need anything to remind him of where he needed to go. Of where he wanted to go. 

In no time at all, with the warm sun beating down on him and the snow slowly melting away, he found himself traversing the familiar hills of Moominvalley. He pulled out his harmonica and began playing as soon as he saw tall blue walls and a bright red roof, cycling through the many, many tunes he’d thought up in the past winter. And as he got closer, the sound of a wooden flute echoing his notes made him feel like he was floating. 

As soon as he could see Moomintroll in his path, standing on their bridge and looking so focused and cute as he played the flute Snufkin made him, he put his harmonica away and just started running. He grinned when the flute’s notes stopped suddenly, Moomin’s eyes widening as he watched Snufkin approach, and his arms opening up just in time for Snufkin to jump into them, the force of the hug sending them into a little spin. 

The moment felt so right, and so perfect, that Snufkin felt silly for ever doubting the connection between them in the first place. He had been happy with their relationship before, and he didn’t regret any of the time he spent being Moomin’s best friend, but he’d be lying to himself if he said that he didn’t enjoy this more. 

Moomin was his soulmate, and he couldn’t be happier. 

When they walked to Moominhouse, hand-in-hand and talking with each other like normal, Snufkin couldn’t stop smiling. The little red string that he’d spent so much time fretting over, so much energy worrying about; he couldn’t even see it anymore. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter~ It was a lot of fun to write all the fluff :3 
> 
> Longer Notes this time!  
> 1\. This story is pretty much "finished," but I did want to write a little epilogue consisting of: a) Snorkmaiden visiting the valley and everyone being excited, b) Joxter and Mymble interacting, and c) Snufkin being the lovesick fool he is. But I would also like to ask if you guys have any questions about this story that I can either try and address in the epilogue itself, or in the notes! So please feel free to ask me anything ^-^ I can't guarantee this will come out anytime soon because I'm /very/ busy with school, but it should be fun! 
> 
> 2\. Fic recs: I haven't read a /ton/ of Moomin fanfiction, but for anyone that is still hungry for character development I highly recommend ["Moominland in the Mirror"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20001673/chapters/47357614) by clefairytea. It entails Snufkin and Snorkmaiden switching bodies until Moomin can workout what, exactly, he feels for each of them, and I love Snorkmaiden in that story. It's also finished!  
> I also want to recommend a story that is currently on hiatus, ["Yearn No More"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18517756/chapters/43887022) by TemenCMoth. It was the first Moomins/Snufmin fic I ever read, and it entails Snufkin encountering a witch and getting cursed to be emotionally honest. Which of course entails telling everyone that he loves Moomin. I love this one purely because of the focus on emotional turmoil. 
> 
> 3\. About this chapter, I knew that I wanted to have Snufkin give Moomin something, but I was thinking things like a painted rock or an acorn. I asked my best friend, who doesn't even watch any Moomin shows, and he said: "Snufkin doesn't own a lot of things, right? Just instruments? What if he made Moomin something like a flute?" And I was like "YOU'RE SO RIGHT."  
> He sent me some TikToks of "lumira_" playing a cool flute that had a flute block tied to it, but when I looked up what a flute block is, it seems that it's more specific to the Native American flute. I loved the idea of Snufkin carving a little heart to attach to the flute, so I just wanted to address that this is where the inspiration came from for that. 
> 
> 4\. Thank you to everyone that has kudosed and commented on this fic! It's great to see that so many of you loved this story as much as I did, and I loved reading all of your comments and excitement <3 I hope you all have a great day!


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